11 December 2012

Sitting here wasted and wounded

I don't really know what to say about Mum any more.

Nicky said that she'd said she didn't want me bringing 'him' (John) to see her. That she had enough doctors telling her what to do.

Christ, I know it can't be easy for her, but she still should be able to realise that I'm bringing John because he's my partner - my family, not because he's a doctor.

They say it's good to talk to people in hospital about what's going on - so I was telling her about Mycroft being home, how well he gets along with Carla, and Sherlock's play, and she just didn't want to know. I thought...maybe being sober, she might...take it in, more, I suppose.

It certainly doesn't make me feel like making the effort to see her again any time soon. Perhaps that's what she wants. Who knows.


Anyway, onto more interesting things. Found these pictures. They're just beautiful. The guy found a way to replace the pigment in living, growing flowers with pure water. Amazing.






The website is here. You should go and look.

They seem so amazingly fragile. Ghostly, almost.


Went to see an osteopath earlier, about the migraines. He said my neck is almost 'too flexible' when I tip my head back, and that the joints in it separate too much when I tilt my head forward. I don't know quite what that means in terms of migraines... but he made everything crunch and worked on my shoulders for a while, as well as my back. He seemed nice. Young, bit posh. Called Charlie. Very friendly.

I can't say I found it relaxing, exactly, but I certainly felt woozy afterward. And walked straight into the chaos of a car crash - well, car vs. lorry. I identified myself, grabbed a spare Police hi-viz and helped sort out the traffic/onlookers until more backup arrived.

It was a bad one. I'm sure the driver didn't make it. The passenger may have, but it would have been touch and go.

I really don't understand people who want to look at accidents like that.

Right, should try and go back to sleep, I suppose.

44 comments:

Anonymous said...

Totally off topic, but I'm hoping that this will cheer you up a bit:

http://www.buzzfeed.com/mjs538/60-moments-that-gave-me-the-chills-during-seattle

The child in picture 35 reminds me of Sherlock because I imagine him having dark curls like that and being willing to hand out flowers at something like this.

Sleep well, gents. L, I hope you find some peace about your mum, however it comes about.

AftSO

REReader said...

That's a lot for one day, L. I could imagine all sorts of reasons your mother's acting like that, but I don't know her so it would just be my imagination. Instead I'll say--you'll see her if you feel you should see her or need to see her for yourself, or for Nicky, or whatever...and you shouldn't if you don't.

And you left out practicing for Sherlock's show!

"Ghostly" is a good word for that bed of roses, there--beautiful but unearthly.

Anonymous said...

Your mom may not need you to keep visiting, but I expect Nicky does. As one acoa to another, I'm going to say that getting a bit of therapy can be helpful in dealing with this. And that while you might, in the end, walk away, its better to do it when you're not angry.

And I'll try to shut up on the topic now.

rsf

pandabob said...

Your mother makes me angry because of the way she treats you Greg you deserve so much better and I'm glad you have it from Nicky and now from John and the boys. How you stay so level headed around your mum I don't know but you are amazing and don't go forgetting that.

Hopefully your day will be far less difficult today :-)

Greg Lestrade said...

Cheers. I feel battered! Charlie was stronger than he looked.

Small Hobbit said...

I'd say the clue was in that she had enough doctors telling her what to do, and by inference that she doesn't want to accept their advice. What she doesn't appreciate is that John was there for you rather than her, but from what you've said her about she probably never thinks about things like that. So, you've tried, but if she doesn't want to accept you for who you are (and possibly she thinks you will also tell her what to do) then there's little more you can do.

AftSO - I saw those pictures last night and thought they were brilliant - so much happiness.

As for people photographing RTAs - incomprehensible. I'd look to see if there was anything I could do (put the first aid training to use) but if the police were already there I'd carry on past, mentally wishing well to all those involved.

Anonymous said...

Battered perhaps, but no headache I trust? Hope the aches all fade soon!

rsf

Greg Lestrade said...

SH - police and fire were there, yeah. I mean, i see bodies all the time, I wouldn't go out of my way to see more.

As for Mum...yeah. I don't think she's enjoying them telling her she needs to sort herself out. But if she can't do it there, with all that help... I don't know.

RSF - what does ACOA mean? And I don't think I am angry. As for therapy...yeah, not really feeling like that right now.

Small Hobbit said...

I work with adults with learning difficulties and part of our training says that if people have the mental capacity then they are entitled to make the wrong decisions. We can guide, but ultimately it's up to them and I imagine that the same applies to your Mum.

John H. D. Watson said...

Those are lovely pictures, both AftSO's and the roses.

And I believe ACOA is adult children of alcoholics.

Greg Lestrade said...

Hope you and Mycroft are out enjoying the sunshine Danger.

And Thanks. Not a term I've ever heard used.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, John's right. And I resisted therapy too -- but finally did about six months worth and at least found out that some of the patterns my siblings and I were in were ruts we could climb out of. It helped. Some things came up in the discussion that I wouldn't have ever thought of on my own.

rsf

Greg Lestrade said...

I don't particularly feel like I'm in any ruts.

I know I have bad habits.

Anonymous said...

Habits of thinking? Falling into patterns with family? Ruts is probably a bad metaphor. There were assumptions I was making that turned out to be wobbly enough to get turned on their heads. Therapy wasn't comfortable, but it gave me some objectivity for coping with one or two of my own bad habits. And it meant I could vent at the therapist instead of people who weren't being paid to get vented at. *shrug* I'm not trying to push you, just explain why I think the option is viable. Half of my sibs did some therapy and the other half didn't, but we've all survived.

To change the topic, those flowers are amazing. They look like something from a different world.

rsf

Anonymous said...

Argh. I should probably say that if you google ACOAs, you'll find an organization which has some stuff. I actually found therapy better than their laundry list approach, which was hit and miss. (And annoyed me.) Sorry, should have googled before I mentioned the topic.

rsf

pandabob said...

Hey Greg how goes the day? busy and keeping you run off your feet I hope ;-)

I hope you and Mycroft have had a good day John and Sherlock How's the practice for the play going?

Greg Lestrade said...

Jesus but it's cold out.

REReader said...

*checks weather app* Below freezing in London, yikes! *shivers* Are you on your way home early? Or out for a case?

Greg Lestrade said...

Case. John might think he's felt my feet being cold in the past... tonight he may have to amputate for frostbite.

I stopped feeling my face about an hour ago

REReader said...

You need heated socks! (I'm sorry you're having to deal with that level of cold.)

Greg Lestrade said...

Do they have batteries? I can't tell on my phone.

it's only minus 4, not that bad. would rather be wearing a lot more clothing though.

Danger, I'll be a bit late, need to wait for nights to take over on scene.

REReader said...

I have to imagine they have some sort of batteries, but they might be pretty tiny.

And cold is not just temperature!

John H. D. Watson said...

All right. Good luck. Sherlock is trying to make it snow solely with the power of his mind...

Anonymous said...

Do they sell those charcoal/iron toe warmer packets there? Because those work pretty well.

It's like spring here, unfortunately. The grass is pushing up from the ground, the weeds are a lovely green and I saw a worm on the sidewalk yesterday when it rained.

I'm with Sherlock. I'd rather have snow!

rsf

Greg Lestrade said...

Tell him to hold off on the snow until I'm home, which should be soon.

RSF - can't take anything onto a crime scene with me/can't put hands in pockets.

pandabob said...

Are you home and warm yet Greg? have a good evening all of you :-)

John H. D. Watson said...

He is home. First thing he did was put his freezing cold hands up my jumper...

pandabob said...

is he bullying you again John ;-)

He must have realised that jumpers are superior in making things warm after all :-)

Greg Lestrade said...

warm boyfriends are superior to making things warm than paper suits are. i'm bloody freezing.

John H. D. Watson said...

You certainly are!

Greg Lestrade said...

i seriously thought i might never stop shivering earlier.

John H. D. Watson said...

Yeah, your nose and hands were roughly the temperature of space. Better now? You feel better.

Anonymous said...

I was thinking the kind you put into your shoes, actually.

I'm glad you're warm now, though! Paper suits sound entirely too flimsy for winter weather.

rsf

Greg Lestrade said...

not seen them, RSF.

Paper suits are too flimsy and don't allow you to wear enough underneath.

Danger - far better. You are indeed Doctor Hotson.

Anonymous said...

Try camping stores. That's where I usually find them. Or online. (That's a UK price, so it should work for you.)

rsf

Greg Lestrade said...

do they really fit in your shoes? I can't imagine anything much fitting in my shoes - my feet have a hard enough time! Anyone here worn them?

John H. D. Watson said...

Can you not fit your jacket underneath that paper suit? They can't expect you to stand around for ages in this weather without one, that's madness.

Rider said...

Doesn't get cold enough where I am for heated motorcycle gear, and you probably can't go to a crimescene while attached by an extension cord to your motorcycle....

But there are things like http://www.activheat.com/index_files/ActivheatHeatedWindproofMicrofleeceVest.htm which would fit under a paper suit I bet!

Best at the scene would be a Dr Hotson of course, being self-transporting and running on curry not batteries so clearly a long term sustainable method. reckon you could get him there as required PPE?

Kestrel337 said...

My youngest wears the 'inside your boot' thingumies for ski jumping. We do size the boots up a bit to accomodate them, but they work marvelously well.

Anonymous said...

I use them when I'm running around in costume in Salem at Halloween, if it's cold. Also during the January cold snap. It does help to have shoes with a little more toe room.

Rider, that fleece vest looks like it would almost be too warm once you turned it on! But I do love fleece for a warmth layer.

rsf

Greg Lestrade said...

Danger - no, paper suit is far too small to fit enough clothes under it in this weather.

Think toe warmers will have to wait until i get new shoes, even then think I'd struggle to fit them. got wide feet.

Anonymous said...

It's mostly just toe space you need. They don't really extend down to the widest part of your foot. Some brands are so flat you fit them under your socks like sole inserts.

And clearly they need to invest in larger paper suits. Or provide you all with really excellent thermal underwear.

rsf

Unknown said...

wow, those photos from Seattle are awesome, got me all happy-teary and sniffly. :) I love that there was a reception for everyone after. What an amazing day. I have to say I was never so proud of Massachusetts (born and bred here) as when it became the first state to legalize marriage equality. So good to see it gaining momentum around the country and the world.

ACOA stuff... yeah... for me, what helped was a book, A Time To Heal, which you can probably find at the library, or really cheap used copies on line. Just finding out that all the ways I thought I was weird and broken were actually totally predictable parts of the pattern, meant I could separate them from my identity, and think about learning new ways of doing/being. But, I also had the book on the shelf a long time before I felt ready to read it. I was glad when I did. I think maybe I'm a little better at not taking things so personally now? cos really, other people are usually 90% about their own issues and not about you. And maybe I don't take myself so personally either! ;)

Unknown said...

oh, that was me again, I don't know why I'm always "unknown" but I forget to sign my initial.
S

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