27 September 2013

Winter in water colours, Shades of grey

I'm stuck in that state of adrenalin and caffeine when I should sleep so I'm just jittery.

We foudnt the boy. He's as fine as you could possibly hope. Scared, pleased to be back with his folks, clearly, you know, got a lot to deal with. But unhurt. I mean, really, a couple of bruises and that; it.

Obviously the school are overjoyed too, even though it was nothing to do with them. Well, I suppose the opportunity was, but they can't keep tthe boys locked up.

The parents are also clearly immensely relieved, but also, as always, guitly and everything. It was all about money, they demanded a ransom for the kid. As far as we could trace it around it was because of a business deal that had gone bad that left someone else very out of pocket, so they thought this was a suitable way to get money back. It's a messed up world where people can think snatching a kid is okay for money.

John was wonderful. It was nice getting to see him work, even if Id sort of lost the ability to focus or process thoughts by that stage. He was great with the boy, and the mum, who had sort of gone a bit into shock or something. And obviously briliant with all my officers. And he didn't even cause any avoidable extra pain to crims. Which is good, from a professional point of view, even if we'd all secretly have liked that. Heard a couple of officers gossiping about him. The 'new' FME. Married, sadly. Wonder who the lucky cow is? I didn't moo. But they might have decided our hug was more than matey.

Now we're all back, Sherlock just got in and threw himself at me, then John and is now showing his mum some degu related thing and also his school book to show her all his stars in it.

Mycroft is home wth us, which we're all vey glad about. It's just one of those times you want to be together.

I lost count of coffee. I passive smoked quite a bit, but didn't light up once myself. Threw up once, because John's right, and no one should ever drink that much black coffee on an empty stomach, fell asleep in quite a few very awkward positions in quiet moments. wondered if I was getting to old for all this a few times.

Forgotall of that and was incredibly glad I do this job once.

97 comments:

pandabob said...

You, your team and your 'new' FME are amazing Greg, We are very lucky to have such good people working hard to keep us all safe! Thank you.

Good luck with the come down from it all and enjoy the time the four of you have together this weekend :-)

John H. D. Watson said...

You were wonderful. I was so proud of you - and it was nice to see you at work too, even though it was nearly all over by then.

I didn't moo

Next time...

Greg Lestrade said...

I'm fairly sure by the time you got there I was just wandering about on autopilot without a clue what I was really doing.

I refuse to moo.

Rider said...

I refuse to moo.

Now that sounds like a challenge.

John H. D. Watson said...

Well, you sounded very professional about it. Wobbly, but professional.

Under any circumstances?

Greg Lestrade said...

just at work. If you have some mooing kink that's fine, I'll oblige.

John H. D. Watson said...

I promise I don't. Think you can sleep yet? You look halfway there already.

Greg Lestrade said...

yeah, I dont know, probably. maybe if you do something soothing ;)

John H. D. Watson said...

I will do my best to be soothing.

Greg Lestrade said...

you're doing great. just...even breathing, so I can match mine to yours, even that sorts me out if I wake up with adrenalin going.

John H. D. Watson said...

Breathing I can definitely manage ;) You can always wake me up if you want to, too.

Greg Lestrade said...

mm. Sherlock in the morning can wake you up I'll sleep.

John H. D. Watson said...

He will, don't worry.

Joolz said...

Good morning all.

Hope is everyone is more rested today. Do you have a lovely family activity planned or are you going to have a lazy day to recuperate. (I'm thinking that might be quite unlikely with an excited Sherlock in the house!) ;)

Have a great day together :)

Greg Lestrade said...

I've only just properly woken up! Sherlock carefully carried a mug of coffee in to me and waved it about a bit ;) (with John's permission - I hate staying in bed when everyone else is ready to go, but I also trust the Doc to leave me as long as he thought I should sleep for)

Not sure what we're doing...something fun!

pandabob said...

Sleep is always good and being woken by a lovely young man with hot coffee sounds just amazing :-)

Enjoy your day together having fun :-)

Sherlock said...

We're making Christmas Cake later Lestrade says so we're all here to mix and then it'll be ready for us to eat.

Small Hobbit said...

You sound to be very organised with making your Christmas cake. Mine normally gets made in a panic half way through December.

Greg Lestrade said...

Ha, I was thinking I was disorganised, because we should have done it before Mycroft went to school! Can't make the cake unless everyone is here to mix it, so it had to wait until now :)

pandabob said...

I suspect we won't be having a Christmas cake this year because I'm usually a December baker and I don't seem to be managing to be any more organised this year than normal :-(

Its a lovely thing to bake the cake all together :-)

Joolz said...

I think 3 months should still give you plenty of time to imbue it with the requisite amount of booze needed for a proper Christmas cake. ;)
Are you going to make a separate, more sedate version for those lesser in age or is everyone allowed a Christmas treat.

Will you be making Christmas puddings too or is that done nearer the time and do you put money and things in yours.

Greg Lestrade said...

Joolz - yes, there's a few cakes being made, various levels of booze. I aim to feed the grown up cake with at least a bottle of brandy. Sherlock's will get orange juice and a tiny bit of brandy.

I don't know if we'll do puds... maybe. We used to have sixpences in ours, but I don't have any.

Joolz said...

Never mind setting light to the Christmas pudding, you could set light to the Christmas cake with a whole bottle in there - you'd just have to have flame-proof decorations on it. ;)

We used to have a coin for wealth and a ring for love, but I guess you lucky guys have already got those covered anyway. ;) (I typed 'licky' guys then - but maybe that counts too!) ;)

Anonymous said...

I don't know if anyone else does this, but I recently learned how to make (american) biscuits and gravy from scratch, which means that now I want to make biscuits and gravy ALL THE TIME just because I can.

So delicious.

Anonymous said...

^^Sorry, that biscuit comment was from Ella.

-Ella

Joolz said...

Ella - They always used to have biscuits and gravy in cowboy films and I always wondered what they were - is it more like a kind of bread or savoury mixture because I only think of biscuits as being sweet such as custard creams.

Piplover said...

Joolz, American biscuits are like bread rolls... only not. I think they're fluffier?

http://www.simplyrecipes.com/recipes/buttermilk_biscuits_and_sausage_gravy/

Greg Lestrade said...

a bit like scones, sort of? They look like it. And gravy...which is nothing like our gravy.

I've never tried making that, Ella.

Joolz said...

Thanks for the recipe link, Piplover, those don't look like what I would call 'biscuits' at all, but it does make people eating them as a meal seem more normal. I agree with you, Greg, they do look a bit like scones as we would have them over here with a chicken supreme or something similar inside, not a gravy as I would think of it. They do look as if they might be nice though, I may give it a go. Thanks

Anonymous said...

I've had scones in Ireland that I was actually calling biscuits for 3 or 4 days because they were so similar. They (the biscuits) are basically milk, flour, and baking powder. No yeast (at least not in mine). I also put in applesauce, shaved carrots, a wee bit of maple syrup, and a little bit of vinegar.

You can make either a cream gravy or a meaty gravy, I suppose. I make a creamy one. It doesn't look even a little bit appetizing but it's delicious.

It surprises me a little that it's apparently unknown over there. I mean, I know you don't have our biscuits, but it seems like there should be some equivalent. I sort of associate traditional English fare with stews and breads and stews in breads and sausages in breads, so it seems like it would fit right in. It's a "Right, now I'm ready to go work in a coal mine!" sort of a breakfast.

-Ella

Greg Lestrade said...

It's a breakfast? I had no idea!

Anonymous said...

There's also different kinds of biscuits. Buttermilk biscuits are round and fluffy and crumbly and really good with butter and chicken. Drop biscuits are probably closer to your scones and can be made in a pan or in the oven. They're the ones I smother in gravy because they're more crumbly (at least when I make them) and kind of shapeless, so cutting them in half and slathering on butter isn't really practical.

Ella

Anonymous said...

Well...I eat it at all hours of the day and night. But I think of it as a breakfast food. (Other Americans? Breakfast food, yes?) Get yourself a biscuit and some gravy and fried eggs and cowboy coffee and get yourself to the coal mines, or herding cattle on horseback, or whatever manly work it is you have to do. ;)

Ella

Greg Lestrade said...

Can't beat an egg and bacon buttie for that ;)

I have veered from drinking all the coffee in the world yesterday to all the water in the world today.

Olli - thanks for info about e-cigs! Sorry I didn't reply sooner (actually thought I had...) I shall steer clear of them.

pandabob said...

It sounds like it'll be nights kept awake by caffeine followed by nights kept awake by needing the toilet ;-)

I hope the evening is treating you all well :-)

Greg Lestrade said...

probably!

I am more tired tonight. And the flat smells of cake ;)

afiendishthingy said...

They're definitely for all meals, but feature in a lot of breakfasts. So at McDonald's in the UK you can't get a bacon egg and cheese biscuit? How sad. Those and ice cream cones are the only things on the menu I really like. I would say biscuits are somewhat scone-like but a good biscuit should be lighter and fluffier than a scone. They are delicious.

Joolz said...

afiendishthingy - No, over here we have our bacon, egg and cheese served on a 'McMuffin' - that's an english muffin, by the way, which is sort of like a toasted bread roll/teacake as opposed to an american muffin which is more like a cake. Now I definitely want to try an American version of a bacon and egg mcmuffin though, if it comes on a 'biscuit' - what is it called over there.

Kestrel337 said...

You other Americans can keep the biscuits and sausage gravy. I'll have biscuits, with shredded cheese mixed in the dough before baking, and dunked in a nummy pasta and white bean soup.

Olli said...

Ella--practice makes perfect! We should have a virtual potluck on here, you can bring the biscuits and gravy.

Greg--orange juice in a Christmas cake?? Wouldn't it ferment either way? I confess that I've never been one for booze in Christmas cake, I prefer mine fresh-baked and "dry". Perhaps that's because I procrastinate making the cake, every year? My mom wasn't much of a baker and I always ate the crumbs stuck to the pan bottom.

Olli said...

Also, my spouse (who knows these things) says biscuits and gravy are breakfast food. (US Midwest)

rsf said...

I can't get online for a few days and everything happens! I'm glad you're all home and safe, and that the boy was found. Did you need John just for his bruises, or did you have some too from catching the kidnappers? I'm not sure from the comments.

As for biscuits, you sent me off to the wikipedia article, which actually has both kinds in a picture, if anyone is interested. Joolz, American McDonalds' do breakfast sandwiches on biscuits and muffins (the kind like small crumpets) too. I think of biscuits and gravy as being breakfast food, but I'm not real choosy about when I have breakfast. I had it at five p.m. today, but that was because I was on a plane all last night and there was so much turbulence I couldn't sleep until I got home.

Did you make enough cake that Sherlock could have some to eat without waiting for Christmas?

REReader said...

I somehow think of biscuits and gravy as a Southern and/or rural thing, is that right? I've never had any, although I certainly know what they are.

I have to say, the picture of you all home together, with Sherlock flinging himself at people, and rushing about showing his mum all his best things; and then all the baking with special cakes for different people--it's a very happy-making image. :)

Greg Lestrade said...

RSF- now I'm really confused ! You have muffins like small crumpets?

And no, no extra cake for the poor starving child. We were making loads already! He did scoff a load of dry fruit and things.


And is currently begging for pancakes and a smoothie.

Piplover said...

I find it kind of hilarious how, even though we're both speaking English, it really isn't the same language sometimes. :)

REReader said...

Pip, was it Churchill that said we are divided by a common language? :D

I don't actually know what crumpets are, so I don't know about muffins like them--I know English muffins, and I know muffins like a bit less-sweet cupcakes (and often muuuuuch bigger, although when we make them at home, we make them cupcake sized),

And now I'm really hungry--could I have pancakes and a smoothie, too? ;)

REReader said...

(The interwebs thinks it was Shaw rather than Churchill. So today isn't wasted, I learned something already!)

Greg Lestrade said...

Sorry, there's never any spare food around here.

This is a crumpet, as described by a Brit: http://27.media.tumblr.com/avWKkQgfgl53804hkgLKYW9Ko1_400.jpg

Best eaten with butter and Marmite.

Of course a 'bit of crumpet' is entirely different...

Kestrel337 said...

I thought crumpets weren't as crunchy as english muffins.

And biscuits and gravy have migrated to the midwest, but as a life-long Minnesotan I'd never heard of them until I lived in Wyoming.

And now, in addition to being up at 4 in the morning, I'm HUNGRY. Will I get scolded for eating a cake-pop?

Greg Lestrade said...

You won't be scolded by me :) (but I don't know what a cake-pop is...)

Neither strike me as crunchy - until toasted. And then still not crunchy, once doused in enough butter to make a doctor cringe...

Joolz said...

'A bit' - my very favourite type of crumpet, Greg. ;)

As to the other type of crumpet (in the picture) I cook mine under the grill, Kestrel337, and I do both sides until they are quite crunchy and then have them hot with melted butter and jam - yum, and now I really fancy some!

Thanks for that about McDonalds, rsf, I would like to try a biscuit version too.

So what's everyone up to today, I think I'm up for a nice lazy day on my computer with a little overseeing of son-and-heir's efforts at mounding up soil around the potatoes he's growing (I hope we're doing that right). Have a great day. :)

Greg Lestrade said...

currently tending the allotment, making the best of the good weather!

REReader said...

That picture of crumpets looks something like what we call English muffins (like these). Which we have some packaged one in the frig, and if you have no spare pancakes I may toast for breakfast! (Although I think my throat would prefer a smoothie. Gah, I hate head colds ;( )

Anon Without A Name said...

Lestrade - you put marmite on your crumpets? Nasty, nasty, nasty...

ReRe - I think the pictures are maybe a bit misleading there; the texture of the english muffin in the pic comes from slicing it in half, then toasting the cut side, and putting butter on it, so it's a bit rough and crumbly. Whereas the top of a crumpet has holes in it, from air bubbles forming and bursting on the surface of the crumpet when it's first cooked. They look similar in the photos, but quite different in reality, I think.

Enjoy the allotment today, guys - nice day for it :-)

Kestrel337 said...

I'd send a link for cake pops, but I mess it up every single time. The link, not the pops. Bake a cake, let it cool. Smash it up with frosting until you have something on the order of a thick truffle filling. Mold into balls, add a lollipop stick, chill. Dip the whole ball into melted chocolate, let harden. They've been something of a craze over here, to which I come late. Be warned; they are time consuming and RICH. And a single cake recipe makes about 60 or so.

REReader said...

Okay, thanks for the explanation, Namesless. Yeah, with English muffins the holes are in the middle, so you split them and toast them so they're crunchy.

Greg Lestrade said...

That muffin you linked to, RR, apart from being a bit flat, is exactly what we would call an English muffin (although why we don't leave that as a muffin and call the cup-cake style ones American muffins, I don't know. Seems a bit arse about face.)

Crumpets are more like a batter. They would be incredibly sense except as you cook them you get very open bubbles in them. And they are definitely best with marmite all oozing through the holes ;)

REReader said...

So then what do you call just "muffin"?

Greg Lestrade said...

Nowadays I think most people (especially youths) would think muffin meant the cupcake sort of variety. An outrage!

REReader said...

:D

(There really should be something called American muffins, just for symmetry... :))

Anonymous said...

In our continued sharing of culture: just what is 'arse about face'? I love how it sounds.

Ella

Anonymous said...

Also the captcha just now was "foodiva," which makes an odd amount of sense.

Ella

Small Hobbit said...

Yes, Nameless marmite on crumpets is excellent ;)

Ella, 'arse about face' means completely the wrong way round.

REReader said...

Analog watches, acoustic guitars, land line phones...

Greg Lestrade said...

SH - redundant statement, that. Because we all know marmite on anything is brilliant ;)

Anon Without A Name said...

SH, Lestrade - you both normally have excellent taste, but where marmite's concerned, you're just so wrong ;-)

Piplover said...

Marmite is evil. I tried it once and thought my mouth was going to turn inside out with trying to get rid of the taste. ;)

Greg Lestrade said...

RSF - sorry, missed answering your question. I had a few bruises - main one on my jaw. Now completely hidden by stubble ;)

Mycroft has just put up with being hugged so hard his innards almost came out as we dropped him off. Very stoic, that boy. ;)

REReader said...

Or very kind/gracious. ;)

Unknown said...

that crumpet looks a little bit like what I would call a pancake, only perhaps with the batter adjusted in some way so as to be not-runny, and maybe more of the rising agent that makes the big bubbles open on the top? I know you wait to flip pancakes until the bubbles have burst on the top, and the edges are looking a little bit dry and toasted like that. It's good not to have the heat up too high, because you don't want the innards to still be completely liquid when you flip them, or they make a mess and don't ever cook properly in the middle. That crumpet looks like it might be a little more robust than a pancake, though, in terms of being able to take a bit more handling, and carry more topping.

From what I was able to see on the BBC news site, the whole incident with the boy at Mycroft's school seems to have been kept out of the news, which I'm sure is a huge mercy to the family. WHEW again for all being safe and sound.
S

Greg Lestrade said...

I have just bitten my cheek...bloody hurts! John is laughing at me in my pain.

S - there are various reasons for that. The first was that during the case we put a very strict embargo on the news, because we felt details would come up which would make the people holding the boy jumpy and possibly act rashly. Of course, this doesn't always work... but for once the old boys' network was in our favour. The head at the school, and the family of the child, both have certain sway within organisations which might have reported it. The school in particular aren't keen to have their name hooked up with boys being snatched! And finally...well, a happy ending isn't nearly as newsworthy as anything else. You can bet it would've been everywhere if it had all gone wrong.

pandabob said...

I'm sure John will kiss it better when he's stopped laughing :-D

John H. D. Watson said...

Only a bit...

Greg Lestrade said...

He just said I shouldn't chew so fast... I look like a vampire now.

Greg Lestrade said...

AnonyBob - he'd have to use his tongue to reach ;)

Olli said...

Ooooh, we wouldn't want that. :)

rsf said...

Sorry for the confusion. I've only ever had crumpets once, a very long time ago, and to my inexperienced tastebuds they were more like English muffins than they were like the "tea cakes" my dictionary had described them as. Of course, the first time I visited England and asked for them I was told they were out of season, so I was pretty confused all around. (And no one seemed to know what I meant by "English muffins" then, either.) Still, they're both round and good toasted with butter and jam, right?

I hope your bruises heal up soon, L. Did anyone else from your team take any damage? I'm glad John could come and make sure you were all all right.

Joolz said...

Morning to all.

Hope your cheek is better today, Greg, and it received some tender, loving care once John stopped laughing long enough.

Hope you had fun in your allotment yesterday and aren't regretting it too much today, I'm afraid my thighs aren't happy with me for my efforts, but the potatoes appreciated it I'm sure. ;) But saying that, you're probably all way fitter than me so I'm sure you're fine. :)

Have a great day.

Greg Lestrade said...

It's fine, thanks. Just got to concentrate on chewing slowly and not biting it again...hate that.

Not too bad from the allotment...

And got to work to find out that - good news, I'm going to be at home all day every day this week, after today... bad news, nights tomorrow and Wednesday and on days next weekend.

Joolz said...

Oh yes, that's always just as painful as the first bite!

I won't ask what caused your own aches if not the allotment then... ;)

Yay for days off, not so much for the nights. Maybe you'll get lucky & a certain FME may be on call with you. :)

REReader said...

Sheesh, you'd think they'd give you more warning before totally upending your schedule!

Greg Lestrade said...

Joolz - I hope Danger and I never end up on nights at the same time. Too hard on Sherlock.

RR - Everyone's schedules are in complete disarray after the end of last week. People in court need to be there more than I need to work days.

pandabob said...

I love the positivity about the night shifts Greg :-)

Hope your day has been productive :-)

Joolz said...

That's true - it would be a bit of a shock to the system for the little guy and maybe too much for Mrs H to cope with. I'm sure he'll be happy to have you taking him to school this week though, even if he'd rather be staying home with you both instead. :)

REReader said...

Makes sense, but still, yikes!

Well, as you say, at least you have a bunch of days off work (even if you won't necessarily be all that awake for them ;)).

Greg Lestrade said...

feel like I'll be doing paperwork at home at this rate... I don't think I've focussed on anything further away than my desk all day.

Anonymous said...

I came into work this morning to find out that my dad had been in looking for me over the weekend. So I guess he decided I wasn't going to accept his Facebook friend request. And I spent the morning talking with my boss, my job's security supervisor, and a local police officer. Luckily all my coworkers already knew to give him no information about my schedule or how to find me. Bah.

Ella

REReader said...

Yikes, Ella, good thing you have your coworkers' support. You okay?

Greg Lestrade said...

Well I'm glad you'd briefed them so they knew not to give out any details. I'm sure he tried to persuade them regardless, so well done to you and them for being prepared for the situation.

Is there someone you can be with when you arrive/leave work for a bit? I'm thinking particularly leaving, after my experience not so long ago. The last thing you want to do is inadvertently let him discover where you live.

Glad you've got a boss etc. you can talk to, as well.

What a shitty situation. I wish you all the best sorting it out.

Unknown said...

oh, "random-internet-person" hugs for Ella, that's an awful situation. I'm glad your co-workers knew to close ranks with you. Stay safe!
S

Anonymous said...

Thanks, everyone.

L--yeah, it sounds like one of the district security guys is going to get "hang out in the parking lot at random times of day" duty. The Head of Security's going to check with the Head of Circulation (I work in a library) to see how much investigating they can do without violating my dad's privacy. Which is apparently something we're still respecting. The officer sounded annoyed because I don't want to do anything official.

I seem to have gone straight past scared and into angry. He won't push my life around like this. I won't let him.

Ella

Greg Lestrade said...

Well...officer being annoyed or not, it's up to you what you want done about the situation. As long as you know all the options open to you, that's all any officer should care about. (And that you're not being influenced to take any action you don't want to - by anyone. Including them.)

I think, whilst there's nothing wrong with being scared, bypassing it and going straight to anger is no bad thing. I applaud your attitude. He just needs to realise it was his actions that meant he was no longer welcome to be a part of your life, not anyone else's, and it's your choice if he ever holds any sort of place, no one else's.

Feel free to talk anything through here. We're all more than happy to help or listen.

Anonymous said...

Best of luck with it all Ella, it's an upsetting thing, but you get to decide whether to have contact with someone or not. Period. Hmph to anyone who thinks differently.

I've run interference before between my father who wants to re-establish contact with my sister, who doesn't want to be in touch with him. It's hard to be in the middle, but dammit, he doesn't get to decide that for her, and he doesn't get to make family events (like our other sister's graduation!) be about it. And if you worked at my library, I would be honored to run interference for you as well. I'm glad your coworkers are supportive.

AftSO

Anonymous said...

Thanks...I think the hardest part is feeling like while I can (and did) set boundaries, I'm not in control of the situation. I feel like I have to be ready to react to anything, which is exhausting, even if I had a plan that I reasonably felt like I could carry out. I'm hoping that the library higher-ups decide that it would not be a misuse of library information to send him a letter (assuming he has a library card) informing/reminding him that I'm not interested in talking to him. I suppose I could leave a letter at the front desk for whoever's on duty to give to him if he comes back in, but accessing his personal information myself would be a huge infraction and I'd almost definitely get fired.

My friend Joe insisted on sleeping out on the couch. I'm having one of those "glad he's here/what the hell are you going to do in a month" inner conflicting moments...

Ella

Greg Lestrade said...

That is a bad situation. But then, we can only ever be in control of our lives up to a point (Unless you become omnipresent, a la Mrs H). I think all you can do is plan as best you can - so plan what happens if he does show up somewhere and actually make contact with you, for example. Have a set piece to say, and also say to him, very calmly "I am now phoning (whoever you want - police, a friend, work) and they know about this entire situation. Now leave me alone." Or "There is nothing you can do or say to me that will change my mind, and if you don't leave me alone, I will call the police and file a complaint against you." - depending on the situation and how safe you feel at the time.

I actually think the letter at the front desk idea is a good one. It shows him you aren't avoiding the situation, but that you have no interest in seeing him - and it's from you, not some colleague telling him, it's your words. You can also take the time in writing it to make sure it says everything you want it to say. (And you can keep/give a copy to the police, so everyone knows that he has fair warning that you do not want to see him.)

As for your friend - sometimes you have to let people close to you do things that make them feel better too, if it's not harming you to let them. Something I found incredibly hard, with John, if I'm honest. But I appreciated...some... of the sentiment.

But maybe point out to him that it's not a practical long-term situation ;) and ask him if instead you could keep his number on speed-dial, so if you ever needed him you could just call him up.

Anyway, good luck with it all. I'm afraid all we can do from this far is hope he comes to his senses, and be here for you if you want to talk.

Anonymous said...

I really like the idea of leaving a letter at the front desk, because it's an action you can take now which will be delivered if he tries to come to your workplace again. And it puts it in writing that you do not want contact with him. That's a good thing to have in writing, and to save a copy of it so that you can send it via email or FB if you needed to, or send in the mail, or whatever. You could prepare it now if that would help you to feel better, even if you do not plan to specifically send or leave it to be given yet. If your workplace cannot provide his mailing address, it is likely you can get it through some Google searching. You can also send him the message via Facebook, and then block him after sending, if my understanding of Facebook settings is correct. Keep copies of what you send. If anything gets sent in return, keep copies of those (you don't have to read them, you can get a friend to read them and/or give them to police as evidence of unwanted contact).

I don't know how trespass orders or protective orders work where you live, but I'd say that even if you decide not to take some official action, know that you have as much right to use those actions as anybody else, and ALSO as much right to not take those official actions yet.

Hope things are going okay today, and good on your friend for staying, though I'd feel conflicted too, I get that. I'm glad you told us about this, we humans work better with help, even talking things over sorts of help.

AftSO

Anonymous said...

Oh, and because I didn't think to say it above, I'm so sorry you have to deal with this right now, Ella. I'm sorry that anyone has to, and sorry that you have to, it sucks, and I wish the world weren't like this, you know?

AftSO

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