I've come home. I'm so cold!

Halfway through our last week of having Mycroft 'home' from School. Next time, he's left school and is about to go to work for the summer! After that, Uni...

We are entering an entirely foreign world to me, and mainly foreign to John (And stupid, if you ask Sherlock). Because Oxford University- where, I'm not sure if we've ever mentioned it or not, he is going (barring him sticking pencils up his nose, underpants on his head and sitting under his exam desk and not even writing his name) - demand rather more in the way of tradition than most, so Mycroft has to have all the right clothes and gowns and ties and whatnot ready and visit again to see his digs once he does get in to the college he wants to, and it's all completely baffling but he seems thoroughly happy about it all, and what more could we ever want than that?

He also has to take various sworn oaths and all sorts, and we've even been told we might get to visit! For formal dinners, no less.

I hope everyone understand how hard it is to behave when confronted with John in a posh suit. It'll be my only defence when questioned!


We also talked about some summer holidays - even though the big lad is working for the cyber spies for most of his 'holiday'. And Mycroft is very sure that he wants to go back to the Moors...where all of this started, for me and the boys.... and sort of where most of it started for John, although not the bloggy bit.

So that's where we're going. Hopefully this time without assassins, hell hounds (normal ones, or rehabilitated hell ones, both fine), no being rescued by helicopters (Unless required for entirely different reasons). We are not only going to camp, but we are going to Wild Camp. We will take bivis and bashas, we will rely on John's military expertise (and my expertise at finding places to sleep when in no fit state to find home), take a tiny amount of gear and live off the land (and pubs. And small cosy tea houses). It will be a proper, genuine, adventure. We will bike around, find cosy spots and bed down under the stars. I'm kind of excited already. (Provided the above rules are obeyed.)


Currently, the allotment is growing like a jungle - mainly weeds - Sherlock's pond is full to bursting with newts, the coffee machine at the office has broken, (reminds me, must find way of making good coffee in the wild...), my work laptop keeps freezing (must get Mycroft to look at it) and Anthea hasn't yet killed me (at time of writing this). Must also warn Dartmoor plod of potential for rustling figures to go through the roof this summer. And warn Dartmoor prison of chance of small boy trying to break IN....

One hundred hairs make a man

mmm. nights. I've avoided them for a while, because of various day time commitments - meetings, court, that sort of stuff. But here we are, nights again, trying to prove connections between people this time, which is...well, fairly boring. When it's not my turn to be watching I'm busy going through reams of data on locations - bank card use, mobile phone calls/signals, all trying to put certain people together at certain times. CCTV, too. It's amazing the trails people leave.

Anyway, half term was lovely. Got to spend time with the boys and John. Mycroft is so different from the quiet little boy we first met. He's a big lanky confident teenager now, with unruly hair and is suddenly fluent in grunting as a means of communication. Sherlock is still stuck between being waaay above hanging onto his brother's coat tails and...doing exactly that ;)

Anyway, tonight Sherlock is staying over at the school, and is very excited. There will be fireworks first, which only adds to that excitement.

I'm not sure if John or I am going. Well, I am sure I'm not going, because I'm at work. I think Anthea might take them up there, and then we'll both go and fetch Sherlock back tomorrow and wish Mycroft well for the coming weeks.


John is going out with Murray tonight. Or Mo'rray, as he is currently known. He is trying to make John join him in Mo'vember. I very much fear he might succeed... because John's only comment so far wasn't exactly negative.."I suppose it's the one time of year people would forgive you for trying to grow a moustache"... so tonight I may find myself married to Mo'hn Mo'tsan.

Imagine this man, with a mo.

And no, I don't know what he's pursing his lips about, or why he's on a slightly dodgy looking giant fur rug, or why he's pulling that rather...er..well....that pose. I can tell you that in the next picture of the 'series', he has his tongue out.

I say no more...

Now, when twilight dims the sky above, Recalling thrills of our love

Well, Brazil haven't had a dream start, have they?? Mind you, neither have England.

Work is busy - it's been hot, money is tight, the football is on, summer holidays are coming... it's all a perfect storm for frayed tempers, too much alcohol, too little...I don't know, care? Empathy?

Have mainly dealt with serious assaults, recently. Mainly fuelled by drugs or alcohol and over money. It's all very...tiring, I guess. The daily grind of people stuck, living in the same places as their attackers, sometimes even with counter-allegations, sets of neighbours at war, people in the same house at war, kids at war. It really just gets you down.

However, returning home is always lovely, with the footy, Sherlock leaping about, frequently topless, as if getting fully changed after school is just too much time wasted.

Sometimes pursued by Maf, if her Mafness isn't too busy having a snooze in the sun. Although she is a bit brighter and less destructive now she's lost her lampshade.

Here's a pic of Mycroft's latest effort, given that I imagine not many of us will ever see this for ourselves...

Spring was never waiting for us 'til it ran one step ahead

First, public service announcement - Please Vote! Or live with the consequences of other people choosing who represents you. And I remind you, other people are sometimes morons.


Anyway, that done, Sherlock's absolutely outraged that he's been stuck at home, not allowed to the polls with either of us. The ballot paper for the European elections was actually taller than him, I think. And full of horrible parties! Anyway, seeing the number of people who can't tell the difference between white and yellow who were out voting, I'm glad I went ;)

Here's the recipe I'm going to make in a bit for Mycroft - in time for it to mature into it's flavours and be perfect for eating.

Work's been busy, paperwork central, meetings, various levels of outrage at current politics, more meetings... I don't know, it's a funny old job sometimes, being caught between an office and a crimescene. Funny old weather at the moment, too. Big thunderstorms today, interspersed with beautiful sunshine.


Still, next week is half term, we'll get Mycroft back, Sherlock will have yet more time off...but hopefully time he can enjoy, and I'm having half the week off, at least, to spend with everyone, and hopefully give John a bit of a break.



Speaking of, here is John, courtesy of Murray, this time.

Take that look from off your face

So after John's last post, Maf came and had a little word with me.

She thinks I've set a bad example, putting up photos where John doesn't look his best. So I'm very sorry for that. She said she wasn't very happy that he'd put up that pic of her looking a bit unwashed. I told her I'd sort it out...

But I did also tell her I might put up a photo of her stuck in the sofa cushions, or trying to lick her own bum...

Told John the same thing ;)

So here's their response:

You make my mundane life all worth while

Hello. I'm really, really, REALLY bored of coughing. Why on earth did I smoke for so long? That made me have a sort of...perma-cough. And I barely noticed it. Now, this has been going on...about a day and a half? And I am SICK of it. Still, at least my lungs aren't just big black blobs loitering about in my chest now.

It's probably all the running, terribly bad for you, exercise like that ;)

Anyway, John is tending to me with hot toddies. Sherlock is just telling me I have to be better. Which I will try. It is art club, after all. And days off. I'd say that I'll at least get a lie in... but probably not.

(By the way, whenever John says 'I want a lie in', or the like, I always respond with 'We can't have a lion, wouldn't fit in the flat/a lion would eat the dogs/A lion? Wouldn't that be cruel?' and the like. To which he always (predictable!) Responds by saying 'Lie In!' To which, obviously, I always say 'Lion? Where would you even get one?'...anyway, this can go on for ages, and he gets exactly like Sherlock does when you pretend not to understand him (or just...don't understand him) I can almost see him holding back the urge to stamp his foot...)

I think I might be delirious, letting you in on these odd snippets of our lives...

Anyway, I was horrible the other day. So have a lovely picture of John instead. Because he is.

Go shave a sheep and knit yourself a sweater

Apologies for the poor quality of this blog. I'm too tired to write much.

So far...we've been rubbish at the training schedule, because I worked too late.

Bryan was in court today. I asked someone who works there to let me know the outcome. Fine and suspended sentence. Not sure how I feel about it. I don't know if prison would do him some good, or put him in touch with some 'real' criminals. Nor do I know why i care.

The weekend was so completely amazing - John worked it all out, with just a tiny bit of help from Mrs H somehow getting us into a corporate box! It was amazing. And we won! And the weather was gorgeous - and Anthea even delivered Mycroft to us, so he didn't miss out! He's home this weekend, so I definitely wasn't expecting to see him - well, I wasn't expecting any of it. It was just brilliant, everything, even my sneaky sergeant fixing the rotas at work.

So...some of you have expressed the need of more pictures of my gorgeous husband.

But clearly if you actually find him irresistible then... you wouldn't be able to resist him. Which would end badly for me.

Therefore I'm only actually using this picture for his (my) own good, right? And he doesn't have any food hanging out of his face! Sorry for the bizarre colour/quality. I messed with my phone setting and don't know how to un-mess.

But If This Ever Changing World In Which We're Living, Makes You Give In And Cry

Worked late. Wanted to get on and interview a suspect we'd found inconveniently late on in the shift.

Came home to find the flat at DefCon1, with some sort of cold war of glaring going on.

Apparently Sherlock climbed on the back of the sofa, the sofa decided that was above and beyond it's call of duty...one large crunch later and Sherlock was on the floor, and the sofa is...well...not exactly sofa-shaped any more.

This is partly because Sherlock is no longer a little waif. He's a strapping young lad. And partly because the sofa is probably older than him.

Up side, we're getting a new sofa... downside, we currently don't have one.

Anyway, Sherlock blamed the sofa, John blamed Sherlock, the sofa remained silent, I blamed...me, probably, and told Sherlock he wouldn't be watching any more programme likes the one last night, if he can't behave the next day. So he decided he blamed me too. And a degu (won't say which one), for 'probably eating some of the sofa and making it weaker'. And Mycroft, for sitting on the sofa...ever.

Now Sherlock is sulkily in bed. And I am attempting to massage the frown creases from John's forehead.


What else... Mycroft is home at the weekend. We may or may not own a sofa by then... more room for everyone, if not? But most of us will have to sit on the floor...

Work is...work. Some good, some bad. I have to go on a firearms refresher, which is...well, inevitable.  Given I've barely had to use my skills, it's not too bad, I suppose. It's come in handy, so can't complain.

Good news is, my ankle survived a run...well...slow jog, the other night. As long as I'm careful, it seems fine. And don't do any silly sudden direction changes or anything.

Oh, and Sherlock's volunteered us to clean the pond up...which is kind of him... and get it ready for all the critters to turn up in the spring.


Right...I'm going to....not sit on the sofa.

And it's further to fall down, 'Cause you fly so high

Had a lovely day today.

We got up to clear skies and sunshine, so John and I had a gentle stroll in the park, and Sherlock took his bike. I wanted to jog, but John gave me one of those 'are you actually stupid?' looks, and gave his medical opinion that my ankle wasn't ready for it.

Which it isn't. But I probably wouldn't have accepted that until I'd tried and failed ;)

Anyway, strolling was fine. Sherlock was manic, it was nice.

After lunch we went for a swim, and Sherlock practised his underwater swimming. He can go quite a long way - between five and ten metres, on a good attempt. I'm trying to get back to being able to do a length. Smoking stopped all that, but I can get about 20 metres now (although not right now, breaststroke kick is something my ankle doesn't enjoy much.)

John did a bit of 'serious' swimming, but was then roped in to doing diving with Sherlock :)

Afterward I need coffee and Sherlock needed food. And, apparently, a huge hot chocolate with sprinkles and marshmallows and cream. And then when we got home he needed a chocolate cake...

So, all in all, a lovely day.

Quite a contrast from yesterday, which was ups and downs. Some charges brought, which made me happy. And a crime scene which just... well, very hard to take in. Nothing prepares you for some of them. I mean, not what you see, but thinking about what's led to it. Thinking about what people have gone through, to lead to the moment you're there. What their last moments must have been like. What was going on in their minds. Sometimes it makes you wonder about the world we live in. How someone can feel that there really is nothing else left for them to do...but that. I don't know, makes you sad for them, for society, for futures lost.


And I think I'll be back at work tomorrow...which Sherlock doesn't appreciate. But I will definitely appreciate having some time off with John later in the week.

Have a picture which has been sent around the office. Sums up the job perfectly.

Oh, and I am doing a seminar. On the hidden world of murder etc. amongst the 'invisible population' - people who've been trafficked, who are held in slavery, or who are otherwise not officially known about within our population.

I fell in love at the seaside.

Soo...I did say I might put a picture of John up. But I don't have loads, really. I mean, I don't take a lot of pictures of John, or of anyone, really. I usually take pictures of things. And I refuse to put up the one of him looking gorgeous in bed the other morning, gazing out of the window. It's not risqué or anything, but it's...well, not for sharing.

So, yes, had a lovely night away. The staff were lovely, the food was brilliant, the spa was amazing (and empty, most of the time! Why wasn't everyone in there??)

There was a hot tub outside. We walked serenely out to it. We ran back, steaming, before important parts of us crawled back from whence they came...

We went for a walk on Sunday morning, out to the coast.

Bands won't play no more, too much fighting on the dance floor

Is it true Mars Rover is on strike?

Seems to be the day for it (although I can't pretend to understand the ins and outs of the American shut down.) I do understand teachers here though. I still can't believe how many people seem to moan about teachers. I mean, long holidays seems to be all they focus on. Never mind having to deal with 35 of the little....darlings on your own. Plus it's another scenario where people moan about someone in another profession 'having it easy' - if it's that bloody easy why don't they go and sign up for it?? Understand the fire service, too.

Anyway, got that out of my system. Maybe ;)

Having a rant because I've just been dealing with press queries forwarded to me ... honestly, I am all for people knowing what we do, how we do it (to a certain extent) and an open and honest relationship with the public we serve. But certain members of the press ask such leading questions, with such obvious motivation. Still...all part of the job.


Had a lovely day today, once we managed to persuade Sherlock he really was off to school. John and I had a very peaceful day. Bit of a run on the bikes (yes, bad us, we took Sherlock to school on the bikes so we could carry on out - and it's international Walk to School Month! Ooops...) Anyway, yeah, then back home, did some chores, then John...persuaded me to go to sleep. So I got a few hours kip ;)

We went to the park after school, also good. And nice to get to chat to other parents/carers too.

Apparently 1 in five Brits have tattoos now. (Good for us - we like lots of identifying marks!). I can't ever imagine anything I'd want for the rest of my life. What made me laugh was that people who get them 'have a stronger desire to be seen as 'unique' - but loads of people get the same tattoos! You're 'more' unique (sorry, sorry, Mycroft, I know you can't be 'more' unique...) when you don't have them, then, surely!

Right, have I rambled on enough?

Danger...now I've volunteered, when is Sherlock's swimming lesson?

We are sailing stormy waters, to be near you, to be free.

Had a brilliant day yesterday. We went 'for a walk'...which ended up with canoeing on the Thames! It was brilliant (except John's phone drowned) - but yeah, loads of fun. The dogs swam and ran about, we paddled, got splashed, did things wrong, had a laugh... We saw duckling and cignets (quite big now) and said hello to other boat-users. And then we came back home and the boys made dinner, and a cake! And also gave me very nice presents - tickets to see Arsenal, and a little camera for my bike.

I've got next week off! Nights, then off for 5 days (two from this week, three from next, jammed together.)

Slight crossover between Danger's shift on Friday 4-10, and mine, 7-7...but we'll work it out :)

Sherlock's ideas for camping are getting ever more elaborate. Desolate islands and things...

Then I've got a conference thing. Three days, Mon-Weds. I've got to run a seminar on cross-border policing with Europe...so got to write that between now and then! I've worked quite a lot of cases with Interpol and Europol, so I don't mind - some forces barely ever have to do anything like that.

I thought about working for Europol after a split with Bryan. Seemed like...seemed like it would make a good change, get me away from everything. Bit of a new start. I got a few job descriptions and things for posts they had open at the time. Serious organised crime, trafficking of people or weapons, that sort of thing. But...I don't know. It obviously wasn't right because I never quite got round to applying.

John has a new phone. He's accidentally called me twice, and sent me two text messages 'Oooio opinion popping' and 'Gggghgyhf gadget hugging jug'. And his swear words cunning disguised into other words has increased 'Fuuu..oooh, why won't this work?' and 'Wan....ted to get on the internet, not ask you a question, stupid phone!'

Mycroft, as always, is a saviour. Whereas Sherlock just wants apps and to find out new things to do on it.

Anyway, for a while now I've had this photo of John which was...just taken at the wrong moment. You know the sort, where you're blinking? But...he's got his tongue out, in a cute way. so i didn't delete it.

And yes I've been bad, doctor won't you do with me what you can

So, before you really do all get the wrong end of the stick - we did indeed go for breakfast in a toilet this morning. An EX-toilet. Revamped. Not a current toilet. I think they'd be really unhappy if you used it as such...

Now it serves good coffee, brilliant juices, lovely pastries and a few other things.

You can only fit about 15 people in there, so you need to be a bit lucky about getting seats. There are stools in the urinals...if that doesn't sound too wrong?? And a table where the stalls used to be. There are another 8 or so urinals on the other wall, which is where we sat. The orange tiles on the far right are the front of the counter.

I'm standing, Numb and frozen, Among the things I love so dearly

After all the excitement of last night - and this evening - I nearly forgot to post.

Last night we got to the hotel late. The address was 'Pity Me'...it wasn't wrong.

Sherlock was unimpressed by the place. No fun things at all.

He'd been really good - mainly - on the journey up, even though it was a long time to sit on a train for. He was asleep when we got to the hotel, but woke up enough to get his pyjamas on, protest about brushing his teeth, and get into bed.

I'm not sure exactly what time it was - not that long after I'd gone to bed, so probably around 2 ish - he climbed into bed with me instead, because his bed 'smelt funny'.

At that point I really didn't care what happened as long as we were both asleep.

He’s a bombshell blond, wired up to detonate!

John called me adorable the other night.

Harry sent me this, to prove I wasn't the only one.

Look at how blond he is! Look at his little fringe and his shirt all-buttoned-up. What a lovely lad, eh?

Not to mention the big wide smile. Could just pinch those cheeks, couldn't you??

Had a lovely lazy day today, despite it starting with Sherlock hiding his school uniform...

Mycroft's been studying lots. John and I have shopped, drunk coffee, lazed about. Then we all picked up Sherlock and went for more coffee and cake.

It's weird having blossom on the trees and snow on the ground. And it's bloody freezing. Ridiculous. John keeps frowning at me because of this sea lion that keeps barking in my chest.

Now chaos has returned again, with Sherlock giving Mycroft all sorts of grief for something. Mycroft is currently rising above it...not quite sure for how long.

Mycroft - here's something John found for you. I don't pretend to understand it all, but it looks pretty amazing! Hope you can escape your younger brother for a bit.


Siblings, eh, Johnny? Who'd have 'em? ;)

I'm cancelled out and rendered obsolete

Today John was forced to go and fetch a huge purple sparkly bone from a shop. As you do.

Obviously, I felt guilty about that... really! So as I happened to be passing, I thought I might give John and Sherlock a lift home with it. Rush hour on the tube is no place to have a huge purple bone, poking innocent travellers in the back...

I also just happened to be in a marked police car... Well, it would take someone with greater willpower than me to take advantage of this situation.

Picture the scene...a busy street, an excited Sherlock, and John hugging a huge bone - almost as big as he is.

And make believe it's wonderland

We went and saw Mycroft today - in the snow. Snow came even earlier than predicted. So it was a cold and slightly slippery ride up there. But we were all fine.

Mycroft helped me do this - by which I mean, put a picture on my phone, and then provide evidence of this...I don't even know.

I do know that I immediately fell prey to some autocorrect. I emailed myself this image, to use in this blog, using the subject 'Jmob' - makes sense, right? J on my mobile?

Yeah, so when a photo of my lovely boyfriend arrived in my inbox with the title 'Knob'...well, it wasn't intended!

Step from the road to the sea to the sky

Today Sherlock has been mainly wishing for snow.

In talking about that - and underwear, oddly, I found this site with before and after pictures of the snow last Feb in the city my family are from. Not particularly so you can see the snow, but just because lots of them are great shots of the city!

And from that city, to this one. London, yesterday morning:

It's a mixed up muddled up shook up world except for...Johnny

So...well, anyone who can tell me what's going on here is really quite welcome. Just have a guess - why not?? Frankly any offerings are going to be fairly entertaining.

I'll let you all know where your response came on the pink-ear-o-meter that John has, once I'm home tonight. If he doesn't kill me. Still, the reason I'm posting this now is because I won't see him for a few more hours, and this way I'll die laughing, at least!

Thank you, Harry, for my lovely Christmas picture of John. It's on my desk next to the other one...

Are you sure you got the room to spare inside

Well, we're still celebrating! Still eating, still drinking, still being given presents, unbelievably - people are far too kind.

Went to Jo and Lisa's today, for tea. We took festive spider-biscuits... they survived an afternoon of non-stop interrogation by Sherlock about...well, everything. Guess he's missing school, really. He very proudly wore his boots.

Jo and Lisa gave me a photo of John. Captures him perfectly, I think: