28 April 2012

I thought I was someone else, someone good...

I have had a brilliant day.

It started out a bit like this:

And yes, that is what Sherlock ate. ALL of it. Admittedly I also ate it. But I'm bigger than him! And didn't chase mine down with a milkshake. Just a lot of coffee.

Anyway, it was lovely, we relaxed, someone else washed up, Sherlock terrified a whole carriage full of people on the tube by asking about ways you could die in/on/under tube trains.

25 April 2012

The sun goes down, the night rolls in

John seems a little brighter today. Although he may just have been putting on a brave face when Sherlock told him he should spend his time off sick folding a thousand paper cranes... He's still coughing like an angry badger defending it's territory. I'm almost scared to go in the bedroom...

Yesterday, as Sherlock mentioned, I said he could have some of these, and some other urchins and things from that website.

We agreed that when he was finished with them we'd put them in a box frame or something and hang them in his room or the bathroom. Seemed like quite a neat, cheap, way to get him some new things to explore.

Of course, now he wants to get his hands on some urchins to eat, too... not sure how well that's going to go. He may have to wait until we're abroad.

I also found this, which made me laugh more than it probably should have. I hasten to add I wasn't about to buy any...

I'm completely dead on my feet tonight, and still have work to do, although I could just leave it and drop it off a bit later than I'd intended tomorrow. I was late picking Sherlock up from school today, which got me right in his bad books - not because he minded me being late, exactly, but apparently because he'd got a bet on with a girl in his class that I had my nipples pierced, and she didn't believe him... he only told me that when I put him to bed, and he asked if you could lose a bet when the other person couldn't prove they were right either...

New rule... no betting on other people's body parts??

Still, day off tomorrow. I thought I might try and cook John some Hot Sour Chicken Broth or something equally as horrific sounding...

21 April 2012

I'm not alone in the night

I've been trying to write this for a while now. I mean - I have been writing it for a while now, but I've been trying to get the words right. Which hasn't been easy, because I don't find being very serious that easy, outside of work.

A few of you have said, recently, how much I've changed since the start of this blog, over a year ago. And I have, I know.

Reading back over some of my entries...I don't know. I don't like myself much. And I don't mean that in...well, a bad way. It was how I was, and it's taken everything it's taken to get where I am now. No shortcuts available. A few of you said you liked a quote I put up in comments, and if any of you missed it, I think it bears repeating:

Habit is habit and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time. - Mark Twain

18 April 2012

He walked up to me and really stole my heart.

I did promise.

Right, training is okay. Lots of work on 'real life' scenarios - situations which have really happened that we have to deal with. It's difficult, but interesting. It's still all just pretend, though. No one can know what they'll do if it happens for real. We're all feeling that.

Mainly lots of being in the wet today, surrounding premises, learning about safe ways to stop people, approach them, different types of weapons and some horribly realistic 'toys', that I don't understand the existance of at all.

Last night, however, was quite, quite, different.

17 April 2012

Victim of your own creation

Can't sleep. Have another video. Jazz really isn't my thing, most of the time. But this I like. Nothing fancy about it, just atmospheric music.

 Sherlock was, once he woke up, full of talk about the pond.

Mycroft was talking about what he and John had been to see.

John was talking about his mysterious man in the river.

I didn't feel like talking about anything.

14 April 2012

eine kleine newtmusik

This post isn't about me at all... I asked the boys what they'd like to post, and Sherlock said newts, Mycroft said this:


Which is a wonderful bit of music, and quite possibly more the type of thing he'll play on guitar.

On to the aquatic life:

13 April 2012

And I Still Believe That I Cannot Be Saved

The course today was hard. We were working with simulations - an acted out scenario on computers. We had to make choices during the action. Choices about deploying weapons, using them, orders to give, how to react to what was happening, that sort of thing.

It wasn't about being right or wrong, it was just about what we each did - how we dealt with the situation. It was fast paced, like it really would be - you had seconds to make your choices.

Homework is to write our incident reports. It's hard because you have to remember everything, remember why you did certain things, why you didn't do others. But in that way it's realistic, because you only get to live through a situation once, and then we would have to report on it.

Next week we'll all look at how we handled it, why we did different things to each other, what we'd do differently next time, all that sort of thing.

Next week we'll also be firing real guns at real targets, and doing live training scenarios, obviously not with real bullets, but acting it all out as if it is real, no more computers.

It's a scary thought, being in charge - because on the beat, it's unlikely there would anyone higher than a DI hanging around, so it really could be down to me.

Anyway, weekend now, and apart from homework, a lot of time with Mycroft, Sherlock and John. The boys are back at school next week - Mycroft will go back Sunday, Sherlock Monday. And I assume John back to work.

I realised, looking back at old entries for something, that a year ago yesterday was when I got back in touch with Bryan, to arrange the dissolution. I said it in comments, but I think it deserves to be said again - because you all played a part in it, along with John, Mycroft, Sherlock, and everyone else. In that year my life has become immeasurably better. And I couldn't have - wouldn't have - done it without your support. But mainly without John's support and patience.

I love you, John Watson.

11 April 2012

He would always win the fight

The course is going well. There's a small group of us, and we all get along. At the moment we're all in together, but later we'll split for a day, I think. There's one other inspector, four sergeants and the rest are PCs. Obviously the PCs want to end up transferring to Firearms, and I think some of the sergeants do, too. Whereas we inspectors are learning how to manage firearms situations more. So today, having all done our homework, we actually got issued Glocks, and took them apart (a little bit) to see all the bits and understand how they actually work. It is interesting. It would be fair to say my name is...known, here and there, in the Met. So people keep asking me if I'm moving departments, or what I'm doing there. So far I've pretty much got by with just shrugging and saying I don't know either. There are a lot of rumours. I mean, I know why I'm there, but it's still interesting to hear what theories people have. Been trying to manage my team via phone and email, which isn't easy. But todays bike ride went peacefully. Really dark clouds on the way back, looking as if they'd burst any moment... But I got home dry. And I think stilton ice cream sounds nice, Mycroft. Should have got some brown bread ice cream to go with it...

6 April 2012

How Many Roads Must A Man Walk Down...

There's nothing like having the boys around to make life that bit more...exciting? Interesting?

I can assure you I wouldn't have been breaking into a school without them...well, not really breaking, just jumping the fence. Trespass, not breaking and entering, so no worries about being arrested, which would have been embarrassing!

1 April 2012

and a star to steer her by

So... we capsized. well, sunk, really. That's what happens when thousands of gallons of water bursts through a lock gate above you. We're all fine. The dogs rescued the boys, John and I rescued each other. Sherlock's fascinated by the recovery operation and the crane.