14 December 2015

Sweet silver bells, all seem to say, throw cares away.

Well, I wasn't going to write this tonight but then I saw the comments on John's blog...and realised what the next three days holds for me...and decided I'd be in no fit state to try and write one of these any time soon.

So...life is...well, the usual. The job remains difficult. The processes remain slow and frustrating. But there we go. No one said it was gonna be easy.

But we have Mycroft back with us, which is wonderful, and the flat is packed to the rafters with creatures great and small. I feel like I should get myself a critter - Sherlock has the goos, John has Maf (Or, actually, Maf has John), Mycroft has the hounds, Anthea has all of us.... I feel left out!

So, have a Christmas tradition - the choosing of the baubles!

I'll leave you to guess which one belongs to each of us. (This is a lie - they all clearly belong to Queen Maftet)

25 October 2015

I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take.

So, I think I've discovered that I like Wasabi. Which is obviously odd, given that I don't like hot curries. But there's something about wasabi that is hot without being burny... I can't explain it. But I think I might have become addicted to wasabi coated peas, courtesy of one of my sergeants, Amy. It's probably a slippery slope. This time next year I'll be living under a railway arch mainlining scotch bonnets.

The rest of this, until just above the picture, is about my current work in child protection, so please don't read it if it will be upsetting.

My team is small (but, they inform me, perfectly formed). Honestly, it's frequently a very odd office - well, room - to work in. We're a bit squashed in, and frequently 3 or 4 people will be sitting at their desk, headphones on, notebooks out watching what would commonly be called pornography, but is in fact abuse. Until you've spent a whole day trying to note down every distinguishing feature on an offender and their surroundings whilst doing your best to ignore the actual content of the video you can't really understand how horrible parts of this job are.

On the one hand, it's a nice feeling to think you've 'saved' victims - albeit too late, obviously, for the ones you know about, and the ones you've saved before it happens, well, neither of you will ever know that. Because I'm under no allusion that without being caught these people would ever stop offending.

on the other hand, sending a body to a morgue for PM and having forensics hopefully give you a plateful of evidence will forever be easier and more pleasant all 'round than trying to interview a terrified 4 year old for evidence.

So, it's a job that is unbearable hard, but also incredibly worthwhile, and I'm still coming to terms with that, whereas most of the team are old hands and better at this than I am. Overseeing kids being removed from their parents/guardians, making decisions about informing completely unsuspecting parents about what's happened to their kid, explaining to wives (so far it's only been wives, although obviously won't always be) why we are arresting their husbands, and watching them realise their marriage has been full of lies, it's all...wearing. And wearying.

Which is why one of the things I'll be bringing back to my team is our 10am tea-break, where everyone who's in the office is welcome to gather around, with a brew and discuss whatever they want - from casework, to something that's made them cry, to how bad their suspect smelled when arrested - whatever, it's a time to share experiences and ideas, and it works really well. Brings everyone together, keeps everyone up on what other cases we have in.


On a far brighter note, both Mrs Holmes and John's parents and Nicky have all invited us for Christmas...or part of it, given work.

And here's a picture of the rugby we went to see. I believe if you look closely you can see SH, winning the trophy ;)

NZ, doing the Haka at Namibia.




Aaaaand....there was a great clamouring for another Upstanding Column (well, okay, one of you asked). So...have at it. As always, all information given is completely unfactual and entirely possibly wrong ;) the topic is anything, from recipes to romance, pet care to plumbing.

27 September 2015

A million shards of glass, That haunt me from my past

Well...so much to talk about.

Firstly, here's the place John took me away to:


It was lovely, so peaceful, lovely walks together, ending in cosy pubs. Wonderful views.


And here's part of Sherlock's birthday weekend - the climbing place we went to. It was great, they were so helpful. I think Mycroft is contemplating joining a club at University, so might go a few more times to get a feel for it.



And finally, the game!

It was great - lovely atmosphere. The crowds at Rugby are notoriously good natured. Even though about 90% of the crowd were All Black supporters, the biggest cheer of the night went up when Namibia scored a try.

The other day, when Japan beat the Boks, down in Brighton, the Bok supporters formed a guard of honour when the train arrived back to London, to allow the Blossom supporters to go through the barriers first - that shows how nice Rugby crowds are, compared to football crowds, where someone would probably have been stabbed and a huge fight would've broken out.


Anyway, all that just goes to show what an amazingly fortunate man I am, to have such wonderful people around me to share so much fun and love with every day. Which is something I'm not going to see so much of in the coming weeks...once I've handed over to Sal and Dimmo I'll be off to CP, with all the misery that involves. However, much like any serious crimes, the victory of getting a conviction and getting someone off the streets and where they can't harm anyone will be very very welcome. The team there are amazing. Dedicated officers who work their arses off doing a very very difficult job, day in day out, because they care so much.

Now, Sherlock wants bacon and avocado for lunch, and the degus need their weekly health check up and bath and to stop trying to burrow up my sleeve.

(And what does everyone think of the new Bond theme....I'm not a fan, I've got to say.)

16 August 2015

Hvala, Croatia!

So...we have returned.

London is far too far from a warm sea.

It was beautiful. I mean, I don't really have words for how beautiful. Stunning. Like nowhere I've ever been.

So, because worlds fail me, have some pics.

8 July 2015

Alone on a platform, the wind and the rain On a sad and lonely face

Ahhhh, the heatwave is currently not waving. But the Tube is on strike as of now, so everyone is still hot and annoyed anyway.

Yesterday was quite moving, really. Ten years since 4 bombs were set off on the London transport systems. Three on the underground, one on a bus.

At the time the first bombs went off the stations/place the bus blew up stopped and had a minute's silence. The nation held a minute's silence at 11.30.

It does feel like yesterday, really. Or last week, maybe. We heard, at first, there had been a massive electrical fault and the underground was suspended. Then we began to hear the rumours, around the yard, that it had been a bomb - and not just one, but a few, at least. As it became clear that there had definitely been fatalities, from those first responders, we geared up to go, because it doesn't matter if you've been stabbed or killed in a bomb attack - murder is murder. And I remember being on the way out, and my phone ringing. And I almost ignored it, just to get going, but something made me stop, and run back to answer it. And it was telling us to wait, not because they were worried there were more bombs - they were, everyone was, there was no need to say it. But because they were worried they had been dirty bombs.

So then we sat, and waited, and watched the news and tried to get on with out work until we finally were sent in.

Right now we're trying to catch a man who is wanted because he stabbed another man in the back because he thought that man was a police officer (he was a barman)...so we really want to meet him.


Anyway, onto far happier things - here's a picture of Mycroft's bike!!

23 May 2015

It’s not because I’m old, It’s not the life I led

A quick Eurovision post! I will update this with pics from the cricket etc., but wanted to get it up so you can comment on it, so to speak!!


Apologies for the delay. I've managed to delete all the photos off my phone and completely failed to get them back. So...

Here's one Mycroft took from the cricket - which was great. We had a lovely time, Mycroft almost couldn't cope with some of the style choices on offer though... They were bad.



That's us batting - just at the start of the innings, and a very attacking field by the Kiwis.

Rain stopped play for a little bit, but we only lost about 2 overs in the end, as it meant lunch was called early. And we didn't get too wet - well, I got a bit wet as I went for a coffee... but when I got back Mycroft was sitting serenely under an umbrella. So we huddled.

John and Sherlock also had an eventful day - they found a poor little wren, which had flown into a window They cared for it until it flew away, though! Look how tiny it is.



Mycroft is doing his bike training on Tuesday - and then we'll be off looking at bikes!

30 April 2015

But every word, Seems so absurd my love

So, spring has definitely sprung in these parts.

Obviously I'd rather not be fishing body parts out of the water - but you know, that's the job I signed up for.

Sometimes crime scenes have their up sides though - they tend to be out-of-the-way corners of the world. Even in the heart of the city there are a few little places that nature still rules.

So these were my recent companions on a crime scene:



Not too close together, I hasten to add, in case you thought the cub was going to have a hearty meal! And the goslings parents were close by, keeping a watch on us as the babies had a sunbathe. 

I showed John, and the first thing he said was 'I bet Maf would have liked to chase those ducklings' (I corrected him to goslings, don't worry). What sort of a monster has my husband become??

Sherlock's eye is looking a lot better. I'm sure in his head he now truly believes the stories he's been telling everyone about how he got it...

And Mycroft and I have tickets to Lords! Obviously we did offer that everyone should come, but Sherlock looked like he was in physical pain at the prospect of sitting still (we've got seats behind the bowler's arm if it's a lefty) and John pulled a face that suggested he'd rather watch paint dry. So Mycroft and I are going - to the test, Eng vs. NZ., third day. Fantastic! I've never been to Lords before, which is ridiculous - it's literally just up the road. We can take some food and a few tins, or a bottle of wine, and enjoy ourselves. Weather permitting, of course. Harrow actually play there -against Eton - every year.

I can imagine Mycroft being a member in years to come, running the country while watching a few overs from the Member's Room ;) (I'm sure he'll tell me not to be so silly.)

We've also been given these - guess who loves them the most? When did such mundane things as coasters start being interesting...I don't think I'd ever seen a coaster 'til I joined the force!

31 March 2015

Seems like you, Chase the clouds away

So, today is the anniversary of the birth of one John Hamish Danger Watson. Husband, child rearer, companion, doctor, soldier, carer, organiser and the best friend I've ever had.

I'd told him I was going to work and would make it up to him on our little holiday we have planned. But actually, we switched off his alarm, and made some ridiculous heart-shaped french toast and bacon, and Sherlock arranged our cards and gifts, and then we went and woke him up with tea :)

Mycroft even took Sherlock to school for us so I could tidy up and get ready for the day... OF FUN.

We were really lucky, it was sunny this morning, so we went for a walk, then got lunch in a little cafe before I decided we should do something different and we rented a rowing boat on the Serpentine. We were pursued by swans. Stealthy silent ninja swans.

Afterward it rained...torrentially... so we had to run into one of the little folly things and hide. And have a sneaky snog.

Once it was time to pick Sherlock up we dragged John off for tea and cake...and now I'm stuffed and I'd promised Sherlock we could make birthday pizza.



Anyway, here's a pic from when Tadhg came for his visit - isn't he gorgeous? They showed us a picture of his Dad, too - and...well, he's the spitting image at the moment, and if he grows up to be too then he'll be beating off suitors with a stick!


In other news, you can now play pac-man on Google maps, in case you had some time that needed wasting...

10 March 2015

Just because you don't believe that I wanna dance

So...I'm home. Early. And with more of the NHS's supplies attached to my head.

We went to arrest someone who was known to be violent (I mean, to be fair, we mainly arrest people who've tried to kill someone...so it's not like any of them are going to welcome us with baked goods and a cuppa.) Anyway, we went with lots of help. Four of us, four uniform officers, all for one man.

But he didn't disappoint. Went absolutely postal, shaking us off like rag dolls.

He tried to run into the back garden, but, amazingly, we'd thought of that...so I burst out of the back door to find four officers clinging to him like ants on an elephant... and joined in, naturally. And ended up making close friends with a very badly made greenhouse.

So, by the time the CS gas and tasers were flying, I was mainly out of it, really.

We ended with one arrest, one fractured wrist (uniform), one frankenstein's-monster-ish head (me), one black eye and fat nose (Sal), plenty of bruises and scrapes and lots of streaming eyes from the CS...

Anyway, paramedics and even more officers showed up, took us all off to our various destinations...John showed up, because Sal called him - we weren't that far from home, so he arrived while the paramedics were busy mummifying my head. Followed us to the hospital, then followed the panda which dropped me home. Staples in the scalp mean putting on a bike helmet isn't happening for a while.

And eventually, after a lot of staples in A&E I was sent off home with him to care for me. Got to pretend I was a doctor though, in a fetching set of scrubs, as my suit is a. ruined and b. forensic evidence.

Mrs H fetched Sherlock, who has announced that staples are 'better than stitches'. I'm not 100% sure on how the hierarchy of medical fastenings runs...probably...sticky tape, glue, stitches, staples? He hasn't seen mine, as they are currently under a ridiculous sticky dressing which I'm sure nurses only put on my head for a laugh. But John thoughtfully took pictures at the hospital, so he was somewhat mollified.

He also showed me this - which is rather cool.

Anyway, John's now having great fun looking after me....honest...perfect patient, me. I'm apparently playing a game of 'the floor is lava' that I didn't sign up to, because every time I try to get off the sofa he's there, stopping me. Although, thus far, he hasn't catheterised me...so I must stop writing this and go and wee out some of the 20 cups of tea he's made me drink so far ;) Later on I might even let him pick some scabs out of my hair..


30 January 2015

I can't do what ten people tell me to do, So I guess I'll remain the same.

Sherlock has texted me to inform me he really NEEDS a pet owl, and even if we won't let him have one, he'll get one when he's older.

So...there we go. I wasn't even sure how to respond. Except obviously he actually texts me using John's phone, so when my message 'Right. Do what you like once you move out.' appeared on the screen I think John thought he'd missed half an argument or something! I got a very questioning text back...



...just realised I started writing this many hours ago, and never continued. Stuff came up.

One of my officers fell down the stairs while searching a house this morning...Bruised ego luckily seems to be the worst of his injuries.

I feel like I've been in meetings forever recently. Not why I became a police officer!!

Mycroft's back with us this weekend. He is currently being regaled with tales of guinea pigs. Lucky that was last weekend - I'm not sure we could have coped with the dogs in the mix as well! The pigs would have made a nice mouthful for them...

Not sure what we're going to do with ourselves.

I heard a good quote which makes me think of Mycroft the other day - "The night hides the world, but reveals the universe."

And have you heard they're going to move Dippy in the National History Museum?? Unbelievable! Going to replace him with a blue whale. Which I'm sure will be spectacular, but... Dippy... (Mycroft has shaken his head and said he can't believe people have given it a nickname.)


They re-created Winston Churchill's Funeral today, on the river. Would've been interesting to see. I think the river police led the boats out - they get all the best jobs! Maybe I should apply for a transfer.



11 January 2015

I'm not the man they think I am at home.

Well, we lose Mycroft today, off back to school after a lovely long time at home. So tonight the place will be empty of dogs, large teenagers, stuff, things and the fridge will remain full for slightly longer... although to be fair, he's been bringing us lots of treats home from work, when he was there.

Here's the first lot of florentines Sherlock and I made. We have somewhat refined our recipe since, and added in some pre-toasting of nuts. But still, they tasted good, even without any of the right ingredients.


I think we're going to make some more in a bit, so Mycroft can take them back to school with him.