30 June 2011

The ties that bind.

So...I went to work, spent all day furiously doing something - not entirely sure what - in preparation for whatever might happen regarding this change in the law. Or not change in the law. Or new parliamentary ruling which means the old law stays. Or...God only knows what.

John met me at lunchtime, though, and bought me a very nice panini and a coffee.

Got home (on the bike - not entirely sure Danger has forgiven me yet. His face was VERY disapproving when I got home. Especially when he realised I'd ditched the crutches at work...), John and Mycroft cooked a wonderful dinner.

Sherlock got in a properly black mood with me for not letting him see some crime scene pictures I had (brutal murder. I'd have had to call social services on myself if he'd seen them), so he has spent his time since, we've just discovered, tying/threading/attaching/binding every single thing (almost) in our bedroom together, with dental floss. About 2 miles of it, in my estimation.

I'm tempted to sleep on the sofa. Or the living room floor.

27 June 2011

Feelin' hot hot hot

Okay, I know it's a cliché, talking about weather, but it is bloody hot here. For London, before everyone who lives somewhere genuinely boiling chirps up. London, the stuffy, boiling, no-air-con city of heat.

I'm knackered, after my performance of the night before. So I would have slept better, music and all that, last night. But it didn't drop below 20c all night. And it's going to hit 32 today. I bet most of London didn't sleep last night. It's not even like there's a breeze. I was stuck in that world of not being comfy, getting frustrated at not sleeping, all that. Reckon everyone's the same.

I might have to go bac to mine and break out some proper shorts, not just the footy ones I keep here for the purposes of modesty when wandering around the flat.

I know it's a stupid thing to say, but it was almost worth it all just to spend some time with John. Hopefully today our schedule includes lazing about in the park, heading to the Yard briefly, lunch out somewhere, maybe going to mine to fetch some clothes. It's not a bad life, I tell you.

And we're due thunderstorms, hail and possibly tornados tonight...(not proper tornados. Little UK ones)

25 June 2011

zzzzzzzzzzz

Trying to cut back on the painkillers very slightly - because the boys don't really like it when I'm a drugged up mess.

The general effect seems to be that I just sleep all day, though. After convincing John that they could leave me and get some fresh air - I wasn't going to keel over during their brief absence. In fact, I don't think I moved - just slept. Tried to watch the bike racing from Assen - MotoGP etc. every time I woke up everything had changed - from positioins to entire races. I didn't have a clue who did what in the end.


24 June 2011

Stop making prophetic blog titles

I wrote all this earlier. Then instead of hitting 'post' hit 'back'. Lost the lot, and thought that someone was in my computer, spyingg on me and stopping me post.

Says a lot about my state of mind. The state of my life.

Right. The case.

I can't say much until after the trial, but i can give you some basics.

They sort of brought it on themselves - the way we did it.

One of the death threats they sent had photos of me from the day before. I think I mentioned it. So we knew they were watching us. Me. Whatever.


So we had a team watching me too. Watching them watching me. And then follwing them. Do you follow? Seeing where they went back and reported. And then seeing who the people they went to went to...yeah.

Anyway, when I went into prison the other day it was to stir up trouble. Tell members of the gang little bits of what we knew, to force them to act.

We didn't expect them to act so soon. Or how they did it.

The front grill of a Range Rover heading for me is going to be pretty high in my dreams for a while.

Sal had an op this morning, to set her arm. She says she's fine. Tough old bird. Hopefully they'll let her out tomorrow.

I do feel terrible about it. That she was with me. That i didn't do more to help her after the crash. That she's hurt because of soething I agreed to. Same as John was.

Right. Going to try and post now and not stuff it up.

23 June 2011

The end...might be nigh?

Trying not to get too optimistic...but the case I've been working on forever does finally seem to be drawing to a close. Fingers crossed. Means I might have to work the weekend on the final push, but then I shall be free! Well...apart from the interviews and the paperwork and the court dates and...yeah, stop thinking about all that.

think about it being over. At which time I shall have some days off, see John for more than a few hours, finally sort out Mycroft with some biking gear - that poor boy has been waiting so patiently for us to have the time to sort it out!

Danger should be getting his stitches out as we speak, which is good. Hopefully he's well on the way to recovery. He keeps telling me not to feel guilty, but seriously, who wouldn't?

Anyway, busy day today. And it's not raining for once - although I may be speaking too soon, as there are clouds looming...

21 June 2011

They're Back! (To The Fuschia)

After a short hiatus, because...well, my brain wasn't working, really...

The return of Greg The Florist.


20 June 2011

Bizarre...

So, the poll results are...well, amazing, really.

Love and Hate both got 13 votes.

Would like to try/wouldn't like to try both got 20 votes.

What? and 'Don't care either way' both got 11 votes.

Did you guys rig that??


I feel like I should have more to say about the weekend, but...well, lots of it isn't mine to say.

So I won't.

Tomorrow I have to go and do two prison visits, in two prisons. Really not my favourite way to spend a day. Prisons make me nervous. That lack of any sort of control over your life. The thought of being trapped in a little cell for hours and hours on end.

I wouldn't hack it.

But anyway, part of the job, so off I trot, like a good boy, and interview a few murderers. Lovely.

19 June 2011

Father figures, family, fraternity

I was tidying the kitchen this morning (and possibly singing. I refuse to say), when a 5 yr old leapt through the door, a massive grin on his face, and his hands behind his back.

Everyone who has ever met this 5 yr old would immediately go into high alert. My hand was halfway to my belt for my baton before he'd stopped moving. (Not to hit him - to protect myself against what ever spider/bug/pigeon/chemical experiment he had.)

17 June 2011

So...Bryan's an enormous wanker.

Yesterday, then.

(And as a disclaimer, because I know you'll all pile in in comments, I do know that some of what I'm saying is wrong, stupid, idiotic. I do know Bryan talks shit. All I'm doing here is writing down my feelings on it. So you can tell me I'm wrong all you like. Hell, deep down somewhere maybe I know I'm wrong. But knowing and accepting aren't the same thing.)

All started as usual - chaos in the house, breakfast, dogs, jam, Sherlock, Mycroft, bickering, John being calm, everything I've come to love.

Then off to work, beneath threatening clouds (literal and figurative). Sally was being ridiculously nice (peril of blogging your entire life, I suppose). I was being useless. Mainly staring into space, or at paperwork, with very little of any use going on in my head. And a lot of very, very, useless stuff.

One o'clock came around incredibly slowly, but also far too fast. I headed to John's.

16 June 2011

Expect the unexpected...

There's a lot of things I probably should talk about.

Some here, some to John, some to...I don't know, some deity who'll listen?

But for now, after the day we've all had here, something completely different.


Fine line...

I'm starting to think there's a very fine line between trying to relax, calm down, and breath deeply (whilst not waking the person half lying on you). And hyperventilating because you're panicking in the middle of the night, in the dark, and don't want to wake anyone.

I'm not sure which side of the line I'm on.

But concentrating on hitting these tiny keys on my phone is helping.

John's probably dreaming that he's back on medical training, treating an asthmatic.

15 June 2011

The long road home

Where to start.

John seems a lot better - probably down to a bit of decent sleep and some rest. And he insisted on getting up and about yesterday, even if it only meant moving a few yards from the sitting room to the kitchen. He still looks like he's gone a few rounds in the ring, too. Obviously he insists he's okay. But being a frequent user of that phrase, I'm not taking it at face Value.

The boys are coping really well. Sherlock did end up in with us again last night, but we'll hope that when he's back in his own bed he might sleep through. We're giving them both lots of hugs. Mycroft's just spending a bit more time with us - although it's not like my flat is big enough for him to get far away anyway.

The second attacker was caught yesterday, which I think made everyone feel a bit better.


John's agreed to come with me to see Bryan on Thursday. I still have no idea if it's the right thing to do. I just know that right now I can't face it on my own. I'm too tired, too stressed, too weak.

I feel terrible that I'm putting John through it when he's not 100%. But I don't want to put it off.

I might just get John to be somewhere close by. i don't know. I guess we'll get there early and see what the place is like. I'd rather John was up to taking the bike - I'd feel better with a quick getaway on hand. As it is, public transport and a cab if need be will do.

I'm probably spending far too much time thinking about it all. Well, i definitely am. It feels like Bryan's been the third person in this relationship for the past few months. I just want to get rid of him.


We're going to Get all our stuff back to John's place soon - after rush hour's died down. And later on I have to get into work to deal with some fall out and check on my teams, then I'll be back with him. I don't want to leave John alone right now - even though 'alone' means 'with a security team'.

14 June 2011

We wake in the night, to stereophonic silence

So I doubt any of you don't know what happened today. Yesterday.

The house got broken into. We can only presume it happened because every other day the place would be empty then. John would have been on the school run, usually with the dogs, to walk them. Security stick with the boys. I'm at work.

But yesterday a perfect storm of music lessons, new security and John desperately needing some peace and quiet and sleep meant he was there.

12 June 2011

lost tempers, logic and lunacy

Just about to leave work. Been here since about 5am. Couldn't sleep, so thought I might as well just come in, get the work done and get home when everyone's awake.

Luckily (unluckily - since he could have done with the sleep?) John woke up enough for me to say goodbye. I didn't want him to wake up and just find me gone, with a note on the pillow.

11 June 2011

Happy Birthday, Ma'am

We're watching the Trooping of the Colour. Mycroft really likes all this sort of thing, and knows a lot about the traditions and stuff. Obviously John knows quite a lot about the different parts of it - different marches, kits, uniforms, etc. Although, to Sherlock's disappointment, John wasn't a guardsman, so didn't have a Bearskin hat and never trooped the colour himself.

Closest I've ever been is as a PC, working on the route. It is a pretty amazing spectacle, I've got to admit. Here (if I've done this right) is a bit of YouTube from last year.

9 June 2011

roll back time

I feel like I'm 14 again.

And I haven't learnt a thing in the past 30 years.

Edit - because the whole POINT of all this is to learn and...yeah, that, really.

7 June 2011

Dealers, doors and doctors.

so today started out crap. two of my team are off working another case, when i really need everyone and more cfor what we're doing. Still bashing down doors and doing searches.

Was having a bad day - lots of grief from the public. unhappy team, etc.

And then i unwrapped my sandwiches and found this:



4 June 2011

Bikes, bikes and bites.

Today was a good day.

Blazing hot, no work (well, okay, a little bit of work, but all dealt with by phone), Danger, the boys, London - all good.

A nice lazy morning started it all off well (although I didn't know poor Sherlock had had nightmares, and that was why he slept in so late, or I might not have enjoyed it quite so much). Still, I can never ever get enough of waking up next to John and not having to drag myself off to work.

Anyway, we had big plans, but still didn't manage to leave the house all morning! Not that that wasn't very nice too, obviously.

We finally got out and into town, with a number of aims - all of them brilliant. Ice cream, bikes, and...bikes.

3 June 2011

For the riding...it's amazing.

So, I'm no good with all this sort of stuff, and Mycroft's in bed.

But if you're in the UK and you want to follow the TT (The greatest bike racing on earth) then you need to check some links out. I've been recording the shows and trying to watch each night. Danger says we can go one year - I would love to. Mad Sunday (you can ride the course, no speed limits...) is my dream.

The ITV site, with the live coverage and the replays

Here's an onboard camera doing part of the lap (each lap is 37.75 miles long.) This shows the different bits of the course - and how a lot of it you're out on your own, over the mountains, and gives a bit of an idea of the speed. It is all run on public roads - through villages, fields, etc.

And a compilation of some of last years' action.

And of course The Official Website.

Feel free to ask me any questions about it. I am fairly well informed. 'Geeky', John says. (But I'll still let him ask questions, too, despite him being rude.)

Oh, and before any of you lot make the connection, yes, this is tantamount to porn for me. You can keep your terrible writing, I'll keep watching the bikes.

2 June 2011

Fatigue, frozen foods and f*** ups

Today I shall be mostly tired.

John and I stayed up far too late. Well, we went to bed, but then we talked for a long time - because there's a lot to talk about, most of which isn't suitable for the boys to hear (and not even the interesting sort of things they shouldn't hear, but the boring side of it).

Anyway, it's good to talk, so they say. Better to talk whilst all wrapped up in a hug. And my mood did indeed improve. Sorry for being on a downer yesterday. Everything got a bit on top of me.

Bryan took those pictures John put up. He was (is?) an artist/photographer/layabout/waste of space. Not in that order.

Don't think John or I are really natural talkers about our feelings, but we're trying. And mainly sort of succeeding. He's a very good listener. And gives good practical advice. Or just agrees that some situations are just crap, no advice needed.

Anyway, that meant we probably didn't sleep until the early hours - and then this morning Sherlock came into our room at about 5 and literally didn't stop talking before I left for work. I only got away from him to have a shower because Danger distracted him with some toast! And by the time I was shaving he was back, sitting on the toilet cistern and telling me about his science classes, and liquid nitrogen. I told him there was a place in Camden where you coukd go and they'd make liquid nitrogen ice cream right there in front of you, for you to eat. By the time he got into the kitchen to tell John nabout this it had transformed from me telling him about it to me promising to take us all there, apparently.

One of the very good things about the science classes (apart from him loving them) is that it gives Mycroft a bit of time alone with John too, so yesterday they went looking at bikes together, and did some studying in the park in the sunshine, which has to be healthier than being locked in his bedroom.