31 December 2012

If You Fall I Will Catch You

Don't want to put up another post - it's too nice seeing Danger's smile every time I click on my blog.

Maybe I should start every post with that picture?

Anyway, quiet-ish so far. But who thinks that will last? Busiest night of the year in custody...

I hope Sherlock gives in and goes to bed at some point during tonight. He tried his hardest not to last night! Went to extraordinary lengths to stay awake.

He's generally been very good though. He does as he's told when he's on the back of the bike - he's still getting used to it, though. Hasn't managed to stop headbutting me yet. But that'll come, in time. He holds on tight, just about manages not to clamber about too much, although he doesn't like that he can't see where we're going. I think if we did any long rides I'd want a proper restraint belt to strap him to me, in case he got bored/fell asleep/got tired from holding on.

I left John, Mycroft and Sherlock with some homemade burgers to have. Not that I'm jealous, much. Lovely juicy home made burgers with salad and a big wedge of really ripe Stilton, chips... yeah, I'd much rather be here. Honestly.

Also, here's an interesting look into the British psyche.

Anyway, Happy New Year to all of you, whenever the clock strikes twelve in your part of the world (sorry I'm late, if any of you are Down Under.)

And Happy New Year to John, who makes every moment of my life so much better. To Mycroft, who brightens my days with his wit and kindness, and to Sherlock, who ensures there's never a dull moment. I love you all.

28 December 2012

Are you sure you got the room to spare inside

Well, we're still celebrating! Still eating, still drinking, still being given presents, unbelievably - people are far too kind.

Went to Jo and Lisa's today, for tea. We took festive spider-biscuits... they survived an afternoon of non-stop interrogation by Sherlock about...well, everything. Guess he's missing school, really. He very proudly wore his boots.

Jo and Lisa gave me a photo of John. Captures him perfectly, I think:

26 December 2012

Fast away the old year passes

Merry Christmas, everyone!

I hope you all had a fun/peaceful/nice day (delete as applicable), whether you celebrated or not.

I had a lovely day. Everyone was very kind about the food, and seemed to enjoy it (there is barely anything left.)

We made two Christmas cakes - Sherlock helped ice ours, Mycroft helped ice Mrs Hudson's.

I think they...differ in style in a pleasing way.

25 December 2012

I really do believe in you, Let's see if you believe in me

Well...today was long.

Work was mercifully quiet, which means I got a lot done.

Then off to see Mum. She seemed...well, she was a bit more talkative, mainly because she had two of us there to tell off and boss about. But that's still progress, right?

Sam was there, which was nice. He's still quiet, like he always was. But we...get on okay. We're just virtual strangers to each other. He asked about John and the boys, awkwardly, because he was trying to use words that wouldn't offend, and he's clearly not used to it. But he still made the effort. I appreciated it. A lot, actually.

The ride down and back wasn't too bad. Lots of water about, though. So many floods.

And now...bed, because Sherlock will be awake before we know it, and chaos will take over, and there's dinner to cook and dogs to walk and presents to unwrap and games to play and doubtless many other things.

So Merry Christmas, all of you. And any of you who have a little light and warmth to spare, direct it to those not having such a great time.

(Now to go and try to tell Danger why all Santa's reindeer are girls...)

22 December 2012

Don we now our gay apparel

Well, hasn't today been ridiculously wet and miserable?

Still, we did some...most? Of the final Christmas shop. Just need to pick up the meat from the butcher...and...errr...well, I need to buy John a present. What do you get the Nanny in your life? Answers on a postcard...or a comment.

We bought baubles.

I got a ceramic snowflake shape, because John said getting a black one with 'Ho Bloody Ho' on it wasn't 'in the spirit'. But my snowflake is nice, I like it a lot (it's the one on the left.). I'll let the others choose if they want to tell you what they got.

20 December 2012

I was tired and awake for some time.

Did a whole lot of case reviews at work last night, before being called out to a domestic. 'Tis the season, afterall.

Night before was a stabbing outside a take-away, over some 'disrespect'. Last night was a domestic about money.

One year one of Mum's boyfriends went out on a bender - drank the money she'd been saving for presents and Christmas dinner. She threatened him with the bread knife. Thankfully he left before she took it any further. Sometimes I forget that when it came to us kids, she could dish it out as well as take it. When people got on the wrong side of her she had a nasty streak herself. Not surprising, really.

Anyway, the point of all this is it reminded me of an Op I was going to talk about. I suppose, mainly, we think about victims of crime, and we hope to find the attacker, partly because that's a dangerous person off the streets, but also so the family and friends of the victim can have that closure of knowing that justice has (hopefully) been done.

Sometimes, we don't find the killer.

More rarely, we don't even know who the victim is. Seems amazing, in this day and age, but around the country, there are probably about 1000 bodies which have never been identified. Seemingly destined forever to stay in cold storage, and never be laid to rest.

Thames Valley have launched Op Nightingale recently, to try and identify some of theirs. Maybe have a little look. You never know - you might spot your old next door neighbour, or that bloke who used to sleep rough near the bus stop...

18 December 2012

My empire of dirt

Normally, I enjoy my job. It's not easy, but...there's a certain satisfaction in it.

Sometimes, it just makes me sad.

16 December 2012

If you should go skating, On the thin ice of modern life

Well, Nicky and hers have headed off home, after a lovely weekend. Certain instances not being mentioned. It was great to see them, though, and we sort of had a bit of Christmas lunch today - crackers and everything :) Carla and Mycroft made it all - kept them out of trouble this morning, being supervised by me. Which did mean John was the one to brave the shops again...sort of feel that may have been the wrong way around, as she's my sister! But nobody thought he should be left supervising the chefs - particularly him!

And then this afternoon we all went ice skating - Mycroft, as usual, making the rest of look like flailing messes as he slid about gracefully. Well, okay, we made ourselves look that way... Then we took refuge in coffee for a while, and then bid Nicky, Mark, Carla and Paul goodbye. I think Nicky probably needed a bit of a break from Mum, too. Who apparently wasn't exactly happy about it, but Rach and Sam stepped up for visiting her, so she's not been abandoned.

Now...now John and I are escaping into a night of debau...er..luxury.

One thing I saw the other day, on the memos list at work, was an Op run by Sussex Police. Operation Cranberry - They're raising awareness of domestic abuse. So they tweeted about every instance of domestic abuse reported to them in a 24 hour period. This is a tiny snapshot of the types of domestic abuse, and the number of people suffering it. You can read the tweets here.

It shows that domestic abuse can take many forms, and isn't just between couples, but parents and children, brothers and sisters, families, it can be men abusing women, women abusing men, same-sex abuse... there's no typical story behind it. I think it's a great way to get the message out there and educate people. Some people honestly don't know that what they're living with is abuse. Others are too scared or embarrassed to come forward. I hope anyone suffering who saw that at least feels like there's somewhere they can now turn (the police or a helpline/charity/friend or relation who could help.)

Anyway, on a significantly brighter note, I need to go and pack...let's see...um...pyjamas...nope. Clothes - just what I'm wearing now ;) . Other...accessories, yup, let's pack!

14 December 2012

Chocolate cookies!

This is Sherlock.

Lestrade and I made chocolate cookies today and we put nuts in some. Here they are:

And we ate some after dinner. Now Nicky and Mark and Carla and Paul have gone to their hotel but they're coming back in the morning. Tomorrow we're going to do some shopping and maybe ice skating and a museum or something fun.

Nicky was upset earlier because she and Lestrade were talking about their Mum but I gave her Argon and she fed her treats and I showed Paul the degu cage and told him how much bigger I want to make it with runs connecting the bits.

And I have to go to bed now because it's late and Lestrade let me have some pictures of crime scenes from his talk today but none of them have any bodies in them just some blood.

12 December 2012

Ravi Shankar - RIP

I was going to post a video here. But really, you should just go to YouTube and watch them all. Hours of them.

An amazing talent. He was generous enough to share his skill and passion with us all.

I've...well, we've made a light up halo. Sherlock seems happy enough. I think it's reasonably  Sherlock-proof, and can easily have all the glowsticks changed when those ones run out of glow.

Tis the season to kill people at the moment, so work is busy.

I've taken New Years night as my 'shit shift' as they're known.

And now, I need to go and tuck Sherlock in, and pretty soon, tuck myself in. I'm knackered.

11 December 2012

Sitting here wasted and wounded

I don't really know what to say about Mum any more.

Nicky said that she'd said she didn't want me bringing 'him' (John) to see her. That she had enough doctors telling her what to do.

Christ, I know it can't be easy for her, but she still should be able to realise that I'm bringing John because he's my partner - my family, not because he's a doctor.

They say it's good to talk to people in hospital about what's going on - so I was telling her about Mycroft being home, how well he gets along with Carla, and Sherlock's play, and she just didn't want to know. I thought...maybe being sober, she might...take it in, more, I suppose.

It certainly doesn't make me feel like making the effort to see her again any time soon. Perhaps that's what she wants. Who knows.

Anyway, onto more interesting things. Found these pictures. They're just beautiful. The guy found a way to replace the pigment in living, growing flowers with pure water. Amazing.

8 December 2012

And the load, Doesn't weigh me down at all

Post title from another song I have to 'learn' for Sherlock. (His response was an accusatory glare at Mycroft, a scowl and the insistence that 'He is heavy though!')

Right, first things first. That mystery red powder...

Here's the end result:

6 December 2012

And every lock that ain't locked when no one's around

Played at the pub again tonight, which was good. Sherlock and John both came, and I sang one of 'Sherlock's' songs - 'King of the Road'.

As far as I can figure out, their show is sort of the part of the nativity where Joseph and Mary are trying to find a place to stay....and then the Kings trying to find them? It gets a bit blurry....anyway, it seems to be about helping each other on a journey, and celebrating good things together, whoever you are... or something. It's hard to tell, when it's Sherlock explaining, as he's far more concerned with what he's doing in the play at given moment, and if he isn't on stage, it's not important...

Here's a fantastic video of two brilliant guitarists/singers. Wish I had half their talent. A quarter of it, even!

4 December 2012

Loneliness took me for a ride

Started today by biting the inside of my bottom lip. Swore. Apologised to Sherlock for swearing. Made him promise not to swear. Made him promise again. Immediately heard him practising...

Headed to work, and to court, which always takes longer than it should. Then had to rush back to the yard because we had info regarding a suspect.

(En route, picked up a text message from Mycroft asking that I 'lose' John's yellow hat. He's said he'll buy a replacement 'tasteful' one.

Later, got a message asking me to promise to intercept the post man if any jumper-shaped parcels were to arrive...assured him that plans for that were already in place.)

Went to an address, and after a bit of waiting, executed a pincer-like move to nab the bloke... well, that went about as well as they ever do. Ended up chasing him after one of the PCs tripped over a small shrub...

Anyway, running about isn't my idea of fun anymore, nor is scaling walls or leaping fences or any of that, especially when there's a bloke trying to kick you in the face every time. However, London's criminal classes aren't known for their healthy attitude to keep-fit, so he tired before we did, and we got him in the end.

Then, once he'd been checked out and got a brief, into interview. Which... I dunno, they're long and boring and entail going over and over and over things waiting for him to say anything slightly intelligent and/or truthful.

And finally, home! For a bath, but not before Sherlock had virtually leapt on me from the window, because he got the part he wanted in the play.

From what I can gather, he's an Angel, and he gets to dance, and he gets to 'tell people when we've moved from one place to another place if they're too stupid to tell.'...let's hope he's slightly more diplomatic than that...

I think he has to do at least one dance with the three kings. Or possibly some camels. Or both. It all got a bit muddled in the telling, because he thinks I know the story, and I clearly don't...

Anyway, going to go and smile sweetly at my other half and see if he'll give me a neck rub. Then practice these songs on the guitar, or I'll face the wrath of Sherlock, the world's harshest critic...

2 December 2012

Does the lipstick on your lip stick on my face

Busy day today. Walked into all the chaos of the Christmas stress building, people getting into all sorts of trouble with relationships and money and mopping up the inevitable Friday and Saturday nights anyway.

There's been a huge push recently on domestic violence crimes - Op Athena. So everyone's busy with that. Nearly 300 arrests since it began last week. Some people who come in for that are already wanted for other crimes, or we then find out we ought to want them...

So today, after meeting John, John's hat and Sherlock for a quick break, involved me going over to the labs and seeing some evidence they've collected.

30 November 2012

As holly pricks and ivy clings, your fate is none too clear

After dropping Sherlock off at school this morning John and I went for a jog. Was the sort of morning where your whole body hurts - fingers and feet are cold, skin is chilled by the wind, lungs ache because the air is so cold...

So naturally we had to find a large warming breakfast and hot coffee/tea!

I think I need to invest in some new thermal layers anyway. The bike trip yesterday was pretty freezing too. The wind chill is phenomenal. SO I should get something good for running as well as biking.

Sherlock is desperate to get decorations up for Christmas - which will most certainly wait until Mycroft is home. But we might encourage some home-made paper chains or something. And there's still bee-innards to be made. So even if it's freezing cold tomorrow, there's plenty to do.

November feels like it's lasted forever. But I can't believe it's only just over 3 weeks until Christmas. That just feels...stupid. Unbelievable. And having spent last year at Christmas with John and the boys...I can't believe we've got another one! We have traditions... it's great.

I am completely dreading the fact that next year it really really will be my turn to work Christmas Day.

29 November 2012

Put on a ragged sweatshirt, I'll take you anywhere you want me to

Got over to see Mum today. Don't particularly feel like talking about it.

Saw a lot of flooding on the way. I hope everyone who reads this is okay, and the worst is over now.

It was quite nice, to open the bike up all the way there and back, even if it was just motorway riding. Freezing cold, but apart form that, couldn't have asked for better riding conditions. Really good.

Who was asking about Christmas lists? Obviously the first things I'd want would be world peace and everything...but after that, an amazing adventure bike, and a few months to travel the world on a lovely big bike...BMW? KTM? Something like that...

I know, I know, it's a BMW... Danger will never let me hear the end of this...

Anyway, I've got the next two days off, and tomorrow I intend to spend all of it with John, doing nice things.

28 November 2012

If I Could Fly Like Birds On High

Well you all seemed to enjoy yesterday's post. So have some more abandoned places.

I've never been to these, either. But sometimes I think about them, out there in the ocean, battered by the weather, basking in the sun, watching the ships come and go, and all the time, every second of every minute of every day, deteriorating a little more, and being reclaimed by nature.

They're Maunsell Forts. They sat out there, with their...crews? Whatever you'd call them. Not only facing the waves, wind and weather, but also the Luftwaffe.

I imagine it was lonely, but at the same time, a place of great comradeship.

Anyway, there are lots of lovely pictures of them and similar, if you look them up.

Tomorrow I'm going to Bristol to see Mum. I'm...not exactly looking forward to it. But I think I'll feel better for seeing her. I'm trying not to get my hopes up much regarding what to expect.

27 November 2012

Worn out places, worn out faces

One of the jobs I've got on at the moment is a bloke found dead in an old factory.

The factory's odd... I mean, it's not, it's like loads of places, but it's one of those abandoned places that just looks like, at the end of the working day, everyone just walked out, shut the doors, and never came back.

I like places like that. Have done since I was a kid. We used to climb in through windows, get into buildings. Nothing illegal, not really, but just...we just wanted to know what was in there. Find things, paperwork, old machines, pictures on walls, photos...clothes, boots... Almost looks like he could have been left there then. It wasn't a violent death. He's just sitting, leaning against the wall. Guess if you believe int hat sort of thing, it's where his soul abandoned his body.

Anyway, ages ago I found a website with a guy who goes about taking photos of places like that. So I thought I'd share one of my favourites.

26 November 2012

I know i'm far from perfect, nothin' like your entourage

For those of you who missed Sherlock's complaints about me on John's blog - we were both feeling pretty crap, so he was all cuddled up on me on the sofa, and accused me of breathing noisily and having an unnecessarily loud heartbeat.

In trying to persuade John to join me on the sofa now Sherlock's gone for an early night I promised to subdue any annoying bodily functions, and John said:

I don't know, your heart's pretty loud... Guess I'll risk it though.

Which just made me think of this. Lovely voice she's got - fantastic writer. Wish I had even a quarter of her talent. I sang it to John...very quietly. But you can have the proper version.

Sorry, not up to much more of an update than that. My eyeballs feel like they're trying to burrow into my skull.

25 November 2012

And your mind, your tiny mind

After breakfast today we walked through the city a bit, discussing the killing room sat Smithfield (used to talk to a bloke who worked there - he said when it was new the killing rooms were 15' square. When he worked there they were 10' square because of all the blood and gore that was never cleaned off the walls - they only sluiced the floors.) Discussed when they used to drive the animals down to the market, through London, alive.

Then ended up near Monument - which none of us had ever climbed before, so we did.

24 November 2012

It's got one friend, That's the undertaker

Today the weather has been horrible. Rain, rain, rain, some more rain... probably the last gasp of hurricane Sandy - we always get it a while later.

Anyway, this meant, as always, we had one seven year old, hopped up on life, confined within four walls.

And who wanted to make many things...cake, biscuits, milkshakes, a pie, a halo, wings, shoes with wings, a degu run the size of the flat, a fort, a maze, a sausage-making machine, a new dance move, some prog rock involving a violin and a guitar, a new no1 Christmas song, some streamers, and the stinkiest stink bombs in the world.

When faced with such a list, John came up trumps. And presented him with this:

23 November 2012

He can't be wounded 'cause he's got no heart.

Nearly forgot to post.

And now I don't know what to say.

Mum's doing as well as can be expected. Nicky's doing a great job of visiting her, talking to the doctors, all that.

Sam and Rach have also been in to see her. Danny hasn't. But then, neither have I.

So I'll resort to posting YouTube videos. My version of poetry...

I'm not sure I ever have sung this to John. Might do that now, before I hit post...

The sound is quite quiet on the video. But it is old (Older than me, Sherlock, so clearly ancient!)

22 November 2012

A clapped out, living, loving wreck

Firstly, Happy Thanksgiving to any of you celebrating.

And thanks for all your support about Mum. She's not doing so well right now, pretty confused, and on top of the stroke being forced to give up on the drink, fags and whatever else...so yeah, it'll be a long hard road. I hope she's got it in her.

Anyway, onto happier things -

Sherlock's been wanting to play Christmas songs - I've been refusing until he picks a few - I'm not going through a million of them! But in thinking Christmas songs, I naturally thought 'Slade' - who wouldn't?? So then I followed John around the room playing this, watching him valiantly try to keep a straight face while Sherlock heckled about the lack of Christmassyness and overdose of soppiness...

Then I showed Sherlock this video. And haven't stopped laughing since. I shall hand over this post to him now, and let the rest of you have a laugh:

Lestrade showed me this video and he's been singing it and PEOPLE REALLY LOOKED LIKE THAT ONCE with that hair he says and had stupid shoes like that and trousers that weren't even long enough  and Lestrade even said he had some trousers with the squares on and people had hair that was cut as bad as that AND HE REMEMBERS IT and this song is from last century and they still had television then and I told Lestrade all that and he keeps laughing and so does John and those people singing were doing it nearly 50 years ago which is half a century.

21 November 2012

We're all drug takers, Give us something tonight

I'm back home, which I'm very glad about. John's been amazing, researching the local healthcare options for Mum, once she's released. Taking care of Sherlock, and answering a million questions. Keeping Mycroft up to date.

My blood relatives...well, Nicky's always been the most reliable person in our family. She's always been the peacemaker, the negotiator, the one who strikes deals and works out the fights so no-one's pride is too bruised. Rachel's always been the quiet one. Watching the rest of us and only saying her piece when pushed - or allowed to get a word in edgeways.

Danny. Danny's pretty much always wanted the exact opposite of whatever I say. And I don't know if that's because of him or because of me. I didn't get on with his Dad, I've never really got along with him. And Sam, his little brother (who is the spitting image of his Dad, and who I haven't seen since...well, it's been over ten years, anyway. So that was a surprise.) who goes along with whatever Danny tells him to do.

And me.

And today we all fell perfectly back into our old roles within a few minutes of meeting up. Like we haven't learnt anything growing up.

So I start by saying Mum's going to need help with getting sober and staying that way, and getting better from all this, and it just descends into an argument about who's ever nearby to help and who's always trying to run other people's lives and christ knows how but ends up with Danny equating me marrying John to Mum and all her marriages, as if that's got any relevance to anything.

At which point I walk out, which is what I always used to do, too. Bloody brilliant.

Anyway, what matters is that Mum's in the best place to take care of her and get her on the road to recovery, and Nicky knows that she can agree to whatever they say is best for Mum and the money doesn't matter - because living with John my outgoings are very small, so I can cover all that without anyone else having to worry about their own families struggling.

And now we just wait and see what happens as she sobers up and starts therapy.

20 November 2012

I can't think of any lyrics that don't seem staggeringly insensitive.

As most of you will know, I'm at my mum's house.

She had a stroke earlier. Luckily...well, sort of luckily her partner was in the house. He noticed after a bit. Called an ambulance.

The doctors said the chance of having a stroke is much higher just after drinking. And higher in alcoholics. And now higher after having one...

Anyway, now I'm in her house, messing about. Tidying.

She's got drink next to her bed. She doesn't when we visit. It's different, seeing a place when someone's  just left it.

Bit like a crime scene.

So, they think she'll probably be okay, after some therapy and stuff. They'll know more tomorrow, when they do a brain scan. They think she was lucky, though.

19 November 2012

Feels like a murder but that's alright

Do any of you actually check up my titles? I often wonder... just occasionally I'm very pleased with them! But I entirely understand that you don't want to spend time trying to track them down.

Anyway, today after...ah, I can't tell you how many cups of coffee, or someone will probably call me an ambulance or something - I got called (well, sort of volunteered a bit) to a squat - a crack house. Someone had called in saying there was a body. Didn't leave their own name, annoyingly.

The whole place was just...well, every bodily function had a pretty good showing. Needles everywhere, drugs paraphenalia, parephenalia. Paraphernalia... that one. And a body, as promised.

So we spent hours digging through it, bagging, tagging, sampling...there will be more DNA register hits from one room than we normally get in ten murder cases, I'd guess.

It was a total mess, and a pretty depressing look at society. And I really don't enjoy digging about in that sort of gear - there's a very real fear of getting stuck with a sharp of some kind.

And all this after being woken up early by Sherlock tugging on my hand to tell me he missed Mycroft. Poor kid. Anyway, we got him sorted and by the time John was up and heading for the kettle he was already planning some form of bubble machine extravaganza. I can't keep up.

I think Sherlock's said he's doing something for the school show that involves singing. And maybe dancing... I think Mrs N is trying to get their class to do something all together. Good luck to her :)

18 November 2012

You know your stripper from your paint

Well, lunch seemed successful. Which is nice :)

We're all now lazing about looking stuffed and wondering if we can ever move again.

As you all appreciated the last picture I got from the 'sky cops' (India99/98/97) I thought you might like another one. Not fireworks this time - but hopefully just as interesting?

17 November 2012

Hold on tight, cause I like the sense, of speed, and I like the sense of you.

Had a lovely day today. Bit of a lazy morning, then off to the off-road bike place.

It was pretty muddy, so there wasn't much chance for doing jumps and stuff - our bikes weighed about three times as much by the end of the ride with all the mud stuck to them!

But it was brilliant - we were filthy, from the spray, puddles, falling off, landing in puddles, pushing each other in puddles, riding along a stream...yeah, just fantastic.

Sherlock and Mycroft had fun too, and at the end Mycroft had a go on the bikes again and Sherlock rode pillion with me, just on the practice track. He is nearly big enough...

But he's also very excited about getting the next size up of violin - we should try and do that in the week, I need to go to the music shop anyway, so we should go and see if he's ready for a 1/2 size yet.

He declared my book 'boring' once I'd read a bit of it to him. I think he thought it would tell him how to solve murders, not just how to deal with the press, paperwork, court papers and all that... obviously there are a few things that would help you...but it's mainly how to comply with the rules and build a strong case, not how to track down the murderer and grab them.

Today was just one of those days were...I can't believe that I'm this lucky. I can't believe the person I was 5 years ago was really me. Things have changed so much, so dramatically. Things I could never have hoped for have happened to me. It's just amazing. My life is amazing.

16 November 2012

Step beside the piece of the circumstance

Right, now peace has (sort of) descended, after Sherlock stealing one of my books for his own intellectual gain.... I shall attempt to write this entry and think about my presentation.

So...sorry, I can't even remember who asked about first responders (by which I don't mean medical first responders - I mean the first officers on the scene of a homicide/attempted.)

John is now laughing because he's reading chapter titles form my book.

Bet he wishes I'd brought home the snappily titled: "Template Protocol for the management of detainees who are suspected of swallowing or having packed drugs or foreign objects into body orifices or cavities"


yes, whoever it was, the very first priority is to establish if the 'body' is really dead. It becomes incredibly embarrassing for all concerned if they are discovered to be alive after an officer's been reeling out crime scene tape for half an hour and drinking tea given to them by locals and not rendering first aid.

So you always get a contaminated scene, basically. What the officers need to know is how to preserve it as best as possible. So, for instance, establishing a single entry/exit and walkway. Sketching/photographing the scene before moving things. Noting where the things were moved to. Starting the Crime Scene Log. ensuring no one enters the scene without protective clothing.

If the victim is still alive, then someone travelling to hospital with them, in case they can identify their attacker, or note a dying declaration (which can be used in court.) Preserving their clothes, getting a pre-transfusion blood sample preserved for evidence. If they die on the way to hospital/in hospital, making sure all the medical equipment used is left in place and not removed.

Obviously, there's lots to talk about, hence them wanting me to run a presentation!

But ask away, if you have specific questions.

I'm going to put Sherlock to bed...

Oh, and just to add - please sign this petition. The law they are trying to pass is completely horrific. If John and I were to live in Nigeria when this bill was passed we could be sentenced to death, just for being us. Jailed for ten years, just for living together, or holding hands, or wishing to be married. Please help people not as lucky as we are.  www.allout.org/nigeria-veto 

15 November 2012

For the next three weeks I went huntin' them nights

After non-stop pestering from people at work today to play the guitar, I finally did tonight - but not for them. Just for the regulars in the pub and John.

It went pretty well. Not perfectly - I'm a good deal short of perfect right now, but well enough that people seemed to like it.

I'd instructed John to do nothing whilst listening. Which he failed to do. He was performing all sorts of breathing and blinking type things, and talked to people, and jiggled his foot in time, and ...well, the list could go on and on. Plus his usual glares were absent and he looked all soppy. Terrible behaviour.

Anyway, with a few months more practice I think I might be ready for the wedding.

14 November 2012

Knowing you're there every day, Makes me high in my own special way

Right, recipe time! Sorry, it's all in UK measures, so anyone in a part of the world where you don't use proper weights and measures, you'll have to convert :) It's a Dan Lepard recipe.

It should be a really rich, reddish brown, moist cake.

1 tsp vegetable oil
3 tbsp dark cocoa powder
100ml boiling water
50g dark chocolate, broken into little pieces
½ tsp bicarbonate of soda
100g unsalted butter, softened
175g soft muscovado sugar
125g condensed milk
1 large egg
150g superfine self-raising flour
1 tsp baking powder

Rub the oil inside a deep oblong cake tin (about 22cm x 11cm, or a 2lb loaf tin), and line the base and sides with baking parchment.

Preheat the oven to 180C/350F/gas mark 4. Stir three tablespoons of cold water into the cocoa until you have a smooth paste, then whisk in the boiling water. Straight away stir in the chocolate and the bicarb, and leave to melt and fizz.

In another bowl, beat the butter, sugar, condensed milk and the egg until very smooth (use an electric mixer). Sift together the flour and baking powder, beat half of this into the egg mix, fold in the chocolate mixture, then beat in the remaining flour until smooth.

Scrape evenly into the tin and bake for 40-45 minutes. Stick in a skewer: if it comes out with a few crumbs sticking, the cake is ready. Remove from the oven, leave to cool in the tin, then turn out once cold. You can have it as it is, but it's nicer with icing on top - this recipe for icing makes a LOT. You possibly could manage to fit it all on the cake, but it's more fun to find a willing partner and spread it on them. (I jest. John would kill me with his laser eyes if I got chocolate on the bedsheets.)

2 tbsp treacle
150g light soft brown sugar
3 egg yolks
4 level tbsp cocoa
4 level tbsp cornflour
300ml milk
250g dark chocolate (or half milk and half dark), finely chopped
75-100ml boiling water
50g unsalted butter, softened
2 tsp vanilla extract

In a saucepan, beat together the treacle, sugar, yolks, cocoa, cornflour and milk until the mixture is smooth. Then bring it to the boil, whisking often so it doesn't scald on the base. Remove from the heat, beat in the chocolate and enough boiling water to make it smooth and creamy. When just warm, beat in the vanilla and softened butter, a knob at a time. Use immediately, as it will firm quickly.

And there you go. In our flat, it didn't last a day. But then we do have Mrs H, security, John and a Sherlock.

I'll let John tell you about our day today. It was lovely. :) Bikes, boyfriend, baking. Doesn't get much better!

13 November 2012

And the sugar that dripped from the violin's bow made the children go crazy

Ahh, lovely day.

Was woken at an ungodly hour by Shortstuff, who was far too lively for someone who'd been up in the night after a nightmare.

Removed him from our bed because John was still valiantly trying to sleep. Made porridge. Didn't have a hangover.

John and I had a gloriously lazy morning after dropping Sherlock at school, coffee, picked up my bike, more coffee, until John went off to see Dr E. So, to fill the time while he was gone, I decided to bake a brown sugar choccy cake with chocolate treacle icing. Which turned out very well - but the icing was way too much to fit on the cake! John helped me dispose of some of it though ;)

Sherlock thoroughly enjoyed having a slice after school - we ran to the school, because a. I need more exercise and b. it meant we could cool down by walking home. Neat.

So, the other day, Anon asked: "Do you have any advice on how to mentally physically and emotionally prepare for a new relationship having left one that was far from good?"

12 November 2012

There's an awful lot of words, But there's no communication

Well, Wow, you lot. Half a million pageviews. Half a million!

That's...not something I ever imagined could happen.

Thank you, to all of you, whether you read or comment or...well, just thank you.

This is just a quick post, really, to say...drinks are on me ;) Party!

The Met have celebrated by putting up the Christmas tree outside NSY... don't tell Sherlock!

I'm dragging John off to a secret location...to do something...secret. I hope he enjoys it.

11 November 2012

Soothe my mind and set me free

Well... I thought today would be calm, we didn't have a lot planned.

I had a word with Sherlock this morning, before John was up, about today being Armistice Day. He's already done a bit at school, and they'd got poppies - and drawn pictures of them - and even looked at a little bit of war poetry. So he was already ahead of the game, really. So then I said about the eleventh hour, and he agreed he'd be quiet.

He took that very seriously, as it turned out, and turned on the radio so we could 'hear the silence', and shushed us all in plenty of time so we wouldn't miss it. And he stayed still and quiet the whole time, which I was very impressed about, because two minutes is a long time.

I didn't know if John would want to do anything...be alone, or go to the cenotaph, but we just stayed in. So I gave him a hug for the two minutes.

It took us a while to realise he'd also unplugged the phone - and the internet - to ensure we had silence. Security came up to ask if everything was all right and check we weren't all hostages!

Anyway, then Sherlock disgraced himself a bit later by having made himself a sheet of ice to form a dagger with and try and stab me - me being the available test subject. Nothing personal...

I thought he'd hurt himself at first, but he'd just got a really cold hand, creeping up on me, and then when his ice dagger didn't actually stab me, but slid through his hand, I think it hurt. Anyway, he's banned from the internet now, and got a good telling off. He's a bit sulky.

So, anyway, as Sherlock is temporarily off the blogs I thought we might try another

Lestrade's Upstanding Column Of Love...

So, ask away. Anon posting is welcome, as usual. Have at it, commenters of the world....

*Please note, all replies may be utter bollocks.

10 November 2012

And curse Sir Walter Raleigh, He was such a stupid git.

bit tired. busy day.

So I give you, Oxford Street's Christmas lights for 2012:

Yup, Marmite. That is indeed an Elf vomiting in a hat...

Other than that bright spot, I'm already sick of Christmas adverts, music and all that. It's November!!

9 November 2012

The moon comes up...and the music calls

Nearly missed a day! But Sherlock is now asleep (he is currently bunched up in a tiny corner of his bed, asleep on his face, in a right tangle of arms and legs. I don't know how he can sleep like that!) John is looking like he might drop off at any minute. And I'm still annoyingly awake.

Tomorrow I have to try and write my appraisal, catch up on the latest paperwork, files, and try to get a bit further on a few cases.

I think it's amazing how forensically aware gangs are these days, and it's making life very difficult as an investigator.

What would you guys do if you'd shot someone, to try to destroy/hide evidence?

There's also doubtless ACPO reports and best practice recommendations stacking up. It can be hard to keep up with the cutting edge of evidence gathering/forensics when we're busy.

And there's talk of running some sort of course, as an SIO, for first responders, on identifying categories of death, and acting accordingly...because I've got so much free time to do that!

My head will be alphabet soup with all the acronyms by the end of tomorrow.

This is, of course, if no one gets murdered...

8 November 2012

The tune that is yours and mine to play upon this earth

Right, as Sherlock noticed tonight, I'm always a bit late home on a Thursday.

This is because, all those weeks ago when I went for a drink on my own, I found a little pub that has an open mic night on a Thursday. And it seemed...nice. Quiet, friendly, a mix of talent. And Jo and Lisa recently asked if I would play a few songs at their wedding reception.

When Jo and I first met I was still playing a lot - to audiences. I suppose she thought I still was. Anyway, I sort of agreed, but then I wanted a bit of practice, where no one I knew would be watching.

So I decided to give it a go for a while. Didn't bank on Sherlock, PI, rumbling me quite so soon.

7 November 2012

Getting Right Down To The XYZ Of It

RR asked:

How about what kind of learner are you? (Like....hands on, books, one-on-one teaching, listening to someone talk, figuring it out by yourself....what way of learning new things works best for you?)

I think that really depends what it is. As a young copper, doing my exams, it was books, then talking it over with my peers, to check we all understood things the same way. I need people to challenge me, quiz me, make me argue my points. Which is good, because that's what I get, in court.

But anything that is practical, it's got to be hands-on, with a bit of guidance, but I can't stand watching people demonstrate and not letting you get stuck in.

Computers that goes double for - can't cope with anyone who does things for you, to 'show you'. Need them to tell me what to do, but let me do it.

I'm not very good at listening to people talking in a teaching way - I zone out a bit.

But I'm also happy to just get stuck in and make my own mistakes. I know it's sometimes handy to learn from other people's, but sometimes the lesson sticks better when it's your own. Guitar playing, cooking, I just give it a go. Mistakes don't matter.

So, all that is what I try to keep in mind with Sherlock. Not doing things for him, letting him make mistakes, no matter how annoyed he gets at making them, letting him figure things out and only stopping him when it would be dangerous not to. But he has a fairly good capacity to listen, too, when he's interested. Although zero capacity for it when he's not...which we're working on.

I'm very proud of him today, for talking to the girl whose boat he thought was good.

And just to prove mistakes don't matter - I have no clue why this bloody thing has decided to highlight this entry. Sorry about that. Edited - Mycroft fixed it!

6 November 2012

Something lewd in a low down accent

RSF was rather taken with the word 'tosspot' when I used it to describe someone today.

So I thought we could have a post on slang/favourite words.

Some of mine are unprintable...but a few of my favourites:

wanker, tosspot, bollocks, Oik, pillock, numpty, tosser, sod (as in 'off' or 'it all'). Kholly just reminded me of another - toe-rag. Brilliant.

I feel Brit slang is seriously misunderstood by a lot of Americans. (I have, for instance, been told that 'bloody' is a terrible, terrible word we will be mortally offended by!) so feel free to ask any questions, if you're not a local ;)

In other news - which of these should I get John for Christmas? Or do I just throw caution to the wind and buy both??

5 November 2012

KHolly asked what I wish someone had told me when I was 7 and 14, that I'm making sure the boys know now...

That's a hard one. I've sort of answered a part of that before, slightly, in regard to relationships.

But otherwise... I think, when I was 14, I probably needed someone to tell me I wasn't an adult. No matter how much I thought I was, or had to be. I wasn't. I was still a child. Albeit with maybe more responsibility than many. I wish someone had told me that. I wish someone had been there so I didn't feel like I had to be responsible. And I hope that Mycroft, now, is only as responsible as he wants to be, and lets John and I help out with all the times he doesn't want to be.

As for being 7...I don't remember that much about being 7. Probably needed telling that I was, actually, a mortal being. And that negotiation was more effective than arguing. But I hope a lot of the advice I'd give myself was completely irrelevant to Sherlock, because his life, is, I hope, very different to mine.

I don't know. I still barely feel qualified to be raising another human being, let alone offering sage advice.

4 November 2012

I Am Staying Right Beside You

I was going to post a picture of some mice on the tube. One was down in the pit, eating a bone - chicken, I imagine, and then a little, young mouse, was peering down from the track, but couldn't get down there. You could see the longing in every line of its tiny body. But they were both brown, and it was a little hard to see them on the picture.

But then I showed Sherlock these pictures and he said I HAD to post them.

Fireworks over London last night, from India98:

3 November 2012

I Just Wanna Try To Do Things On My Own

Today, Zeph asked about something I'd like to learn that I haven't yet.

It's a hard question! (My gut instinct is to say 'learn the guitar'. But there would be protests, I know)

I'm always so busy I don't feel like I've even got time to think about learning things, let alone do it.

I suppose...I'd like to be able to make things. Like, carve stone, or...paint. Wouldn't it be great to be able to paint lovely pictures. Or even draw well! But I don't know...do you really learn painting and drawing, or do you...I don't know, learn a bit, but need a lot of natural talent too?

And carving things...where would I put them? Can't imagine the National Gallery would be clamouring to take them in...

This will probably sound silly, but it would be pretty nice to learn how to do that sort of really artistic bondage, too :) although I actually have no desire to tie anyone up! Quite the opposite, actually... But whenever I've seen pictures it always looks so lovely. The name completely escapes me. Kin...something and I want to say Subaru...Shubaru? You can all Google. Just maybe not at work or in the library ;)

2 November 2012

And That Is When My Spark Got Hot

RR asked what my favourite saying was.

So I've been thinking about that. I'm sure that John, Mycroft and Sherlock can share things I say a lot...but my favourite saying, I think, is something my Nonna used to say.

She was a very straightforward lady. No nonsense. Said what she thought, told you if she disapproved. Didn't let you feel too sorry for yourself.

 Which was lucky for me, because it meant when my Dad did a runner she wasn't worried about what to do, about whether it wouldn't be welcomed by Mum if she still had a part of our lives. She just said that just because he'd gone, didn't mean she was. And her and my Nonno were a big part of my life.

So, here's her favourite saying, really:

'Siccome la casa bruci, riscaldiamoci'.

Which means, 'Since the house is on fire, let us warm ourselves.'

1 November 2012

Don't Be A Coconut

Right. ReReader asked if we'd be doing our effort instead of writing novels - which means posting every day, I think.

I'm not sure I have the brains to post every day! But I can try.

However, you lot need to suggest/ask/quiz/prod and generally give me some ideas. Anything. I will do my best not to be offended. Might even revive Lestallion's Upstanding Column of Love, if I get desperate.

Sherlock gleefully informed me, when I got home, that John and I could get married in a court. (An old one, converted into a hotel.) I think that's a bit much like work! I'll swear in instead of saying my vows...

Trying to plan somewhere to go and watch fireworks with Mycroft. And over the weekend Sherlock and I (and John, if he stops putting chilli in things) will make biscuits to take to him. And I've promised Sherlock some form of toffee-apple cake/pudding.

The atmosphere in the flat is still lethal to most forms of life, after John's relish earlier. Feel like my mucous membranes are melting. I'm amazed the degus survived.

30 October 2012

Light The Fire And Walk Away

It's still sinking in, this whole engagement thing. My office has now been cleared of all hearts, except one I've stuck on the drawer of my desk. Sort of reminds me, as if I could forget.

Just...feels amazing. I know lots of people don't like the idea of changing names or wearing rings, because they're symbols of days when it signalled ownership, not partnership. But I've always been the opposite. I really want the symbol...to show someone wants me, I suppose.

Bryan didn't wear his ring. Ever, really. A few times, I suppose, early on, then it went into a drawer. I didn't really mind, I suppose. His choice. Although now I think it might have been for other reasons...

I'm doing this a lot. Thinking about the first time around. Trying not to feel...guilty, about the fact I'm thinking about it. I mean, it's natural, right? Doesn't feel like I should be doing it, but...yeah. Can't really help it.

Sherlock's still full of questions. He texted me earlier to say we should get married in an old court - he's found a place, apparently. I'm not sure where we'll go for. I quite like the idea of outside, but I don't know ho practical that is.

All that really matters is that it happens :)

Sally found one of message pads on my desk earlier, that I'd been doodling hearts on. She says I'm disgustingly happy. And Mrs H found me giving John a kiss goodbye at the front door this morning (him still in his pyjamas) and called us 'indecently happy'.

So I guess everyone's noticing we're happy :)

This entry is studiously not about the Met selling New Scotland Yard and scattering us all over the city. Because.

28 October 2012

I Hear The Train A-Coming

Yesterday we went to a place that's the place that all of the old things from London Transport live. It was buses and trains and signals and signposts and everything.

Some of them were really really old and some were a bit old and some were broken and some had been mended and it was interesting to see everything. There were signs for Harrow for Mycroft and there were signs saying Finchley like Lestrade's name and we got to go in some and the man said if we went back again then there's a time you can see what it's like to drive one!

26 October 2012

We'll Never Be Lonely Anymore

Woke up bright and early this morning (I say that as if there's a choice, with a tent full of boys and dogs.)

I'd sort of promised Sherlock we'd have a big breakfast, but he really wanted to use the stove, so Mycroft said they'd do it and treat John and me.

Bacon and fried egg butties - perfect camping food! Anyway, it was getting toward sunrise (No, the boys don't sleep until it gets light. Far too much excitement for that!.) so John and I took a walk to the beach to welcome the day.

It was completely beautiful - here's a photo John took that I've nicked to make my blog look good :)

Stunning, right?

Anyway, some of you'll know that camping makes John go a bit soft in the head - I mean, last time he asked if I'd move into the madhouse flat.

This time, we were sitting watching the sunrise, with the waves lapping quietly and the world appearing in front of us in the milky dawn light...

He asked me to marry him.

I don't think I made a very coherent noise at first, but I did manage to squeeze him half to death and say 'Yes', once my heart had finished exploding inside my chest. You know when there's just so much emotion in you it feels like you'll burst?

So...I still can't quite believe I didn't dream it all. Have to keep grabbing him or squeezing his hand or catching his eye and just...yeah, sharing that feeling.

He is everything to me. He's seen me at my worst, but what he finds within me and draws out is the best of me. He is so...caring, so honest. He's my best friend, my conscience, my biggest cheerleader and most constructive critic.

He makes me happy.

So, well, been quiet today because we needed to tell other people, so they wouldn't find out here.

Mycroft said he wanted a new suit anyway. Sherlock wants to be best man to both of us. And jump out of a cake.

And thank you, to all of you, who've supported us, offered your advice to us, helped us to understand one another when we've been too close to see the full picture, and assured us, like the tag says, that love is thicker than blood. I can honestly say our relationship is stronger for having all of you as friends.

25 October 2012

The Unknown Troubles Of Your Mind

Bloody hell. I really thought I'd be okay camping. John's in the sleeping bag with me, two massive dogs, the boys.

But it's cold and dark and damp an there's a very thin bit of canvas between me andthe rest of the world and I keep hearing things and it's just like being in that bloody hole that bastard kept mein and I fell like the sound of my heart trying to get out of my chest is downing everything else out.

And my phone nearly out of battery so i guess Ill wake John up and hope he's got a good plan up his sleeve before he has a sleeping bag full of puke and a boyfriend having heart failure. fucking hell why can't  jst feel normal?

21 October 2012

He's Begging Me To Come With Him...

Um, so, it's actually true. My boyfriend (you know the one? Ex-Army, tough as old boots, has an encyclopaedic range of frowns, has been known to shoot things.) now owns a hoodie...with a unicorn on it.

Yes, that is a hoodie with a unicorn on it.

(And yes, I agree with Mycroft, that it is better than his Christmas jumper)

18 October 2012

Make this boy shout, make this boy scream!

I bought John a little present today. Saw it, thought of him, so to speak. I'm a big believer that presents shouldn't be for certain occasions, but just when you see something perfect for someone. It's off being framed.

Anyway, that's under the clicky-thing.

Still nothing on my case. CCTV evidence is weak, no witnesses have come forward, can't find a motive or reason. Frustrating doesn't cover it.

We get Mycroft back tomorrow, which is wonderful. I've got the day off, so John and I will go and fetch him, then get Sherlock, if he hasn't actually exploded from excitement about half term.

His school isn't religious, but I think they're talking about Harvest Festival or something, at least in the context of history. And also, apparently, making boats. Never mind needing a bigger boat...I think a bigger pond will be needed.

But first, I will have a glorious morning with John.

16 October 2012

I know I'll never be me, without the security, of your loving arms

I just sang the new Bond song to John. Well, I tried. He laughed so hard that I started laughing too, before the end.

I assume he was laughing at the singing, but I suppose there was a chance it was my Bond-theme-style-dance that I did along with it. All slo-mo arm waving and shooting.

Sherlock is now completely set on going camping over the half term. It's still Mycroft's decision, though, which Sherlock thinks is so unfair. But it's Mycroft who will have homework, and who'll need more of a break. (And who has now said he'd like to go camping.)

I have promised to make him the dessert we saw last night.

I'm feeling a lot more positive since John and I had our talk. I don't know, feels a bit less lonely, you know? Not even that I've talked to him about anything I hadn't already, but just the thought that I probably could, if I did want to.

I think I need a guitar stand. I usually just lean them up, or put them back in their bags, but it's not exactly safe or good for them. Especially when Sherlock is being a bat. Or an owl. Not sure which.

Not happy about the case we're got right now. No suspects yet. I hate that.

14 October 2012

If I Stay Here Won't You Listen To My Heart

Feels like a long time since I updated.

Some of that is because it felt wrong to talk about anything here when I wasn't talking to John about it. We got in a bit of a mess. Like he said, both of us were making assumptions about the other. Neither were actually asking the other one though.

I... Didn't realise that John wouldn't mind talking but was sort of waiting for me to talk too.

I find it very hard to tell him things - difficult, horrible things - when I feel like he'll then worry about those things, keep them inside him, stewing over them, and not talking about it. I don't want to put him in that position. So I decide on his behalf it's better if he doesn't know. And honestly, I don't have to talk about things. So it seemed fairer, in my head, to sort of meet John on his ground, and just not talk about any of it. Which obviously didn't work for us.

And a lot of you asked me if I was talking to him. Which I never answered because I sort of wanted to say it was him not talking to me, actually. Which isn't fair. But in my head, that's how it was going, and that was better for him. And saying it would make it seem like I was accusing him of being the one in the wrong. Whereas I didn't really think he was. I thought we were doing what he wanted. I don't know, like I said, it's a mess.

But yeah, we're better now. I mean, not better, but better than we were.

I don't know how to make anything he feels 'better'. As he said, he wishes they could have done more, found me sooner. But that just wasn't possible. The moment they had a clue, they were with me faster than I could believe.

Nor do I know how to try to stop people worrying. I mean, I know John and a few of you felt better that I did nights with Sally, but I don't full understand why yet.

Don't quite know how to talk about a few things yet. But at least I know I can, and should, when I figure out what to say.

Having spent a day or two contemplating life without John and the boys, and that seeming like a reasonable alternative to asking him if we coukd talk... Just shows how skewed my way of dealing with things got there.

10 October 2012

Every fear I swallow makes me small

Sherlock asked to go out for cake today, after school.

Made me think. Some countries have wet and dry seasons. Some hot and cold. Sherlock has cake and ice cream seasons. I reckon About October-April is Cake, May-September is Ice Cream.

Obviously, it can Cake in the Ice Cream season, and it can Ice Cream in the Cake season. And sometimes, there's a rare beautiful phenomenon of the ice-cream-on-cake, which creates a proper feast.

I think I'm going to go back to work on Thursday. I feel like if I leave it any longer it'll be harder. Like I should throw myself back in again.

Being scared is just...shit, really. Especially when I know he's not even out there now. I'm still sleeping with the light on. Except I don't actually sleep very well with it on. Probably wouldn't anyway. I usually like it really dark when I sleep. But right now 'really dark' means I start thinking about everything far too much and get scared that I can't tell if it's John next to me and all sorts of other stupid things. So the light stays on.

I haven't been scared and actually had time to think about it in a long while. I've been scared, briefly, in the car crash, things like that, but there was alwas something bigger going on. Something to do.

I think the thing I thought about most when I was in that room was that these days I have so much to lose. Last time I had a lot of time to dwell on it I didn't feel like I had anything much worth living for. Gave an odd sort of bravado, that feeling.

I'm very glad that this time I did have, and it gave me the determination to try anything I could to get away or fight or just do anything. And it worked.

Mycroft's been far too modest about what he did to find me. He was amazing. I still don't really understand how he can work out where someone is that quickly, but he can. And he just shrugged afterward and said that anyone could have done it. I've no idea what his future holds, but he will be so dedicated, and so wonderful, at whatever he chooses.

8 October 2012

no witty or relavant song lyric tonight

Well I'm back home.

Never been kidnapped before. I don't think I'd like to do it again.

I know they'd be planning it for a long time, probably, but it did seem remarkably easy. No one seemed to find me being marched to a van in a supermarket car park at all odd. Pretty sure I would have, it i'd seen it happen.

anyway, I don't know what to say, really. Thought maybe wriing it out would help but now I don't know what to put.

I was scared. For me, for John and the boys, Mrs Hudson. They said they'd kill John and the boys, and there was nothing I could do about it. And there wouldn't have been. And I had a lot of time to think about that. It was very lonely. Although it was better when they weren't there than when they were.

they made a lotof threats. I don't know if they would have carried them out if John and Mycroft and Sal hadn't tracked me down or not. Probably shouldn't think about it.

I hope they're all caught very soon.

6 October 2012

Jump up, look around, Find yourself some fun

Mrs N's visit was largely unremarkable. John and I managed to both make each other panic and calm each other down before she arrived, and I don't think either of disgraced ourselves during :)

She enjoyed the baking, and was very impressed how much Sherlock knew about it. But when she asked if he wanted to be a cook when he grew up he scowled and said "No, Lestrade does that." So apparently I'm safe in my job as dinner-provider to him for some time yet.

She was also very impressed at how much reading John does with Sherlock, and says it shows as he's pretty advanced even for their school.

But, as we knew, the areas he needs to pay more attention to in class are being patient, giving others a turn, not monopolising things and not getting so frustrated when other kids don't understand or master things as fast as he does.

But the school are working on all those things too. So between all of us, we'll get there.

Mrs N was also impressed about how he cares for the degus, and how much he knows about them.

Overall she said he was a lovely boy, and an asset to the school, which I've got to admit made both me and John swell up with pride a bit, I think.

I've got work over the weekend, which Sherlock has already declared 'not fair', but we're going to go and see Mycroft together, and I'm sure Sherlock will be proud to share what Mrs N said with his big brother.

Mycroft's busy with all his schoolwork, but he says it's not too much and that he's enjoying it. And that he has time for us to take him out to dinner!

And now, I have no idea how it got that late...but I'm off to bed.

3 October 2012

Get Your Hands Out Of My Trousers

Sherlock has changed my blog. He was bored of the old one, and this is a nice picture. I was also sort of missing my grey and blue colourscheme.

It was taken in Ireland, for his birthday weekend. Down into the sea in a little gap in the cliff.

There seems to be nothing but bad news around at the moment. It's all a bit depressing, isn't it?

Although I did have a bright spot to my day today. Was buying a coffee (yeah, there's a surprise, right?) when I was staring out of the shop window, waiting for the nectar of the Gods to be brewed and ready...and noticed a very familiar face outside. Someone I thought was...inside. Just chatting to someone on the other side of the street. So I called up control and enquired, thinking that if he'd gone away then it was a bloody short stretch and I'd want to look into why the judge had been so lenient.

29 September 2012

Brains are in a rut

Yesterday John bravely left me and Sherlock to our own devices while he went off to talk to one of the FMEs I work with, Manas. He's a great bloke, been doing the job almost as long as I've been on the force. Seen it all, from deaths of tiny babies to the carnage of the terrorist attacks in the tube. Peaceful, planned suicides to the messiest murder you can imagine. Allegations of police brutality, and people so terrified after they've been assaulted they don't want to be near another living person. A good bloke to talk to about what it is to be an FME.

I think John would be incredibly good at it. But I also know there are things that you deal with that are very hard. And some of those things are ones I won't find it particularly easy to talk to him about.

Anyway, that meant that Sherlock and I had to occupy ourselves. High on Sherlock's list for the evening were crisp sandwiches and inventing a new explosive security dye device.

High on mine were keeping the flat in one piece and proper nutrition.

We both sort of got what we wanted.

27 September 2012

Beyond your tunnel vision reality fades, Like shadows into the night

It's not very often I feel a bit lost for words for a blog post. But I have been recently.

John was amazing today - in light of my current inability to get a decent amount of sleep, he went out and bought some truly amazing decaff coffee.

I know it's been a while, but every time he does something like that - goes out of his way to think of me, I'm just amazed. I don't expect it, I hadn't even really mentioned trying to cut back on coffee except for one comment, and there he is, already ahead of me.

We had a great weekend. The boys both enjoyed themselves, Sherlock is still being a different animal every night, and Mycroft really enjoyed the prison/fort/island. Especially when John mentioned the family history he had linked with it.

I'm working a few cases at the moment, none particularly nice. Although being a detective for homicide and serious crimes that's not exactly a surprise, is it?

I really do hope we can work out a way for John to be an FME. Mainly because I think he'd be very good at it. Although Im more than aware that it can be very difficult. I don't think any amount of training can prepare you for some things.

And also, it'd mean maybe I'd sometimes get a bit of time looking after the boys on my own. Which I think would be fairly fun. And I'm not sure I've done it since the famous Murder Scene John walked in on... yeah, I can see why I don't get left alone with them now. :)

24 September 2012

Park Life

Lestrade said I could update for him so I want to say all about our weekend. There's lots of pictures.

21 September 2012

It's so hard to be yourself when you feel like something's wrong

We're all together again :)


(It was the closest to glitter that the internet would provide)

Sherlock went to bed horribly late, but he doesn't have school tomorrow, so we didn't think it would do him any harm. And if it subdues him at all, then even better...

Obviously can't tell you where we're going for his Birthday, but you'll find out soon enough. It's just lovely having Mycroft home again, and spending time together.

Especially in light of what's going on.

I don't get it. None of us do. Unless the entire point of sending pictures of us...or me, this time, is just to make us uncomfortable. In which case well done, it's working.

When I spoke to John after Sherlock had opened the envelope I...I dunno. I almost knew, after he'd asked me if I'd sent anything. Don't have to be a genius to get from that to why he'd suddenly want to talk to me.

I wasn't expecting it to be pictures of me though. Us, maybe. Not just me.

I suppose I was just the easy one to find.

Been a bit difficult sleeping again recently. And now...yeah, probably worse. I mean, I have complete faith in the security team, and John, to keep everyone safe - not that there is any direct threat anyway. It's just...the thought of being watched. Waiting for the next thing to happen, constantly feeling like you've got to be on your guard. Honestly, it's like the last couple of years of my marriage. That feeling that you just can't relax. Always wondering if you're doing the right thing.

I thought I was past all that.

18 September 2012

Find, I want your name, On my tattoo

Unbelievable news from Manchester today. Senseless. Incomprehensible.

My thoughts are with their families, friends and colleagues.

"Step forward now, Officer, you've borne your burdens well.
Come walk a beat on Heaven's Streets. You've done your time in Hell."

In more cheerful news, Sherlock set some sort of glitter-paper trap for me to walk into. So I got home to be utterly doused in glitter and confetti. It's everywhere. And I mean everywhere.

And now, onto a message I promised for AnonyBob, for being the 24000th commenter on this blog. Which, no, doesn't contain nearly enough about my job and far too much about 'boring stuff', Sherlock says.

16 September 2012

You want to throw confetti fingerprints

So, clearly my last poll was a bit silly. You don't get to pick and choose what evidence you get when you're investigating a crime.

The person who chooses that, you could say, is the criminal. So perhaps the question should have been 'which of these would you rather leave behind at the scene of a crime, if you were a criminal...'

I'm happy to report that 53% of you would make rubbish criminals. Actually, to be fair, most criminals make rubbish criminals, so perhaps that's not so good!

Anyway, from my perspective, as a copper... Fingerprints, brilliant. Mainly because we have a LOT of them on record, we can take them easily, even out on the street, these days, get a match, make an arrest, fantastic.

Footprints...well, excellent if you leave them. And lots of people do. Because none of us can levitate yet, and very few criminals carry a mop and bucket with them... however, a bit prone to being ruined by others. And we have to catch you to get a match.

DNA...if you're a convicted criminal, we'll have it on record, otherwise, again, we need to get you and take it, and it does take time. But still, a good find at any scene.

However, in the eyes of the law, one of these results is less reliable than the others...

15 September 2012

Spinning around!

Lestrade says that's a song and he uses songs to do his titles and that's what we did today. This is Sherlock.

First Lestrade went to work but after he helped me get breakfast and it's lucky he can do eggs with one hand because that meant he could do breakfast and then he went to work and not for too long because he came back and John said he'd go and get Lestrade's bike and that made Lestrade smile lots.

Anyway then because John had to go on the Tube Lestrade said we should go and do something so we went to the river and there were lots of people. There was a big stall with old books on and lots of food and people just walking around and first we went on the giant chairs and then Lestrade said we could go on the BIG ride so we did and here's a picture we took after we went on it to show you and John:

It's really really really high up and you can see loads and you spin around and around even when you're going up and down but mainly when you're at the top. It was brilliant and I want to go again! And afterwards we got ice cream because Lestrade said I would be sick if I had it first but I wouldn't have been.

And then after a bit we went home because we thought John might be back and he was and he wants to go on it too he said and I said I'd take him but Lestrade wants to take him too.

Now Mrs Hudson is looking after me and she said she wouldn't want to go on it at all and John has taken Lestrade out to dinner I think because Lestrade is sad about his hand and his case that's just legs and I read in the news they belong to a really little baby so that's not very nice. And then Lestrade being sad makes John sad as well as he's probably lonely now we're all at school and work again. But I think dinner with John and pudding and having his bike back will make Lestrade happier and going on the ride again will too especially with John and my birthday will make everyone happy because I bet we'll go somewhere brilliant and I hope maybe camping and the animal park.

12 September 2012

See the times are changing, And I'm sure of nothing that I know

I've no idea what I look like. Sitting in a pub trying to type on my phone. Like some old bloke who can't use it right probably.

Haven't been to the pub in ages. And almost never on my own, but it's not the sort of night to go and sit by the river, which is my other default destination when I don't know what to do with myself.

Sorry, John. I'm not remotely angry with you, although I suppose it seems that way. Or maybe I am, a bit, and jealous. but I'm aware it's stupid and pointless. Which makes me far more angry at myself. I know you're completely capable of taking care of yourself. I am more than aware that right now I couldn't be any help even if you did want it. Which you won't. So that leaves me with a bad mood and the only person who deserves to deal with it is myself. Which I'm probably doing a monumentally bad job of.

I keep forgetting I have to put down my phone to pick up my drink though. In Sherlock's words, 'Stupid hand'. My bike's fixed though. So might have to persuade John into picking that up for me, if he's still talking to me once I roll home.

Just having one of those days where nothing specific goes wrong, but nothing goes remotely right either. My team are virtually mutinying. Them and the rest of the force. Service, I mean. Not a force anymore, and isn't that the truth. More of a whimper than a bang these days, even with some of the genuinely good ideas and ops we do.

So I've got a team of officers who are being asked too much and can't do enough. And now we've been told that all our plans for retirement, the one light at the end of the tunnel, is being switched off.

Overheard some of them today making wild assumptions about my life, my future. I am, apparently, minted. And this won't effect me. Well, maybe they're right. Obviously I'm much better off now than I ever have been. But if there's one thing life's taught me it's not to sit back and expect everything to work out how you think. I've got a plan B now. Hell, I've got plans for most of the alphabet these days.

And now I'm going to hit post and every single paragraph I've put in this sodding update will disappear like always. Sorry. I'll go and put them back in once I'm at home. And I had a drag on a cigarette earlier, before deciding the amount of self hate that would bring later wasn't worth the very temporary pleasure. Now feeling like I may as well have hung myself for a sheep as a lamb. Can hear my mum now 'I don't know why you do these things to yourself, Greg.' Neither do I, mum. Neither do I.

Edited to add paragrahs back again.

And to say I'm happy that although it's taken far too long, the families of the Hillsborough victims have finally been apologised to, and I hope they can take some comfort in the truth coming out, although obviously it will never be enough. What a shameful episode for the police.

8 September 2012

Fences, we put up our defences.

Well. This will be a slow enty and probably not very long because typing with one hand is slow.

John pretty much said what happened. heading to ~Richmond, bloke swerved and cut us up and headed off. I don't know if it was planned or what. could have just been bad riding, really. No idea.

Anyway, I don't know what i did I think I sort of rtied to reach and grab John, but just ended up landing on my hand on the kerb and  bending my fingers up or something. And John's now massaging my bruises with ice cubes

My bike's in the garage, getting fixed and checked. I've got my spare helmet...and actually need to ask John if his is all right (I'd suggest not, actually.) I know I cracked mine on the same kerb.

we werent going very fast, but even not fast is fast enough when you hit the road.

Last night was nice. Mrs N seems like she'll cope with Sherlock, and he's warmed to her a bit.

And it's about a year since I moved in with John and the boys. So we should celebrate and have a date...when I don't need John to cut up my food for me... and after he's let me buy him a new suit..

Nice shirt, Danger? To go with a lovely suit?

4 September 2012

"You! Yes, you behind the bikesheds, stand still laddy!"

We're finally off to take Mycroft back to school. Everything is packed. Well...everything he absolutely needs right now. I'm sure we'll deliver some things in the future, and take away others...

Sherlock is a bit quiet. Think he'll miss his big bro really. Although he's excited about this thing on Friday that Mrs N has suggested - a sort of food+drinks thing in the school grounds, with the added bonus of frog spotting.

It'll be good for parents to get to talk to her, as I'm sure all the kids there have odd little quirks and things that she's probably best warned of. Sherlock very grumpily said that Mrs T has passed on 'Sherlock's Big Book of Things Not To Do'.

So...it'll be odd, the flat being rather a lot emptier, without one fairly small (but tall) boy, and two very large dogs.

Mycroft, I saw this and thought of you:

I've printed you out a copy, so you can put it up in your room ;)

(and yes, you can have one too, dear reader, if you know what the song lyrics is from today without cheating. You will have to print it yourself, though...)

2 September 2012

If You're Fond Of Sand Dunes And Salty Air

As John said, we went for a walk along the beach yesterday.

I think Mycroft thoroughly enjoyed time to laze by the pool, in the pool, in the sea, and not be under constant surprise attacks, or attention-seeking from anyone. When we got back he was floating on an inflatable in the pool, reading. No fear of being tipped in...

Here's where we ended up - it was a big sand dune. John floated somewhere at the bottom, letting the sea soothe him into a state of restful peace... until he was rudely interrupted by certain people.

As you can see by the right corner of the picture, the dune got a lot steeper, so was perfect for running down to launch our attack...

I think we're having another lazy day today, although apparently there are some roman ruins nearby, so we might go and visit those. Then think about going home...

30 August 2012

Here we come, walking down the street. We get the funniest looks from everyone we meet.

So, today...today...don't know where to start...

At the beginning?

There was pre-breakfast swimming, as we knew Mrs H would be here at some point, and we might not get to swim later. Mycroft stayed out and supervised the Little Shermaid while John and I sorted out fruit and stuff for breakfast.

Mrs H arrived before the boys were even dry, and ate a bit with us. Then we gathered essentials for the day. Then removed 90% of what Sherlock considered 'essential' from his bag. Then left.

It was a bit of a magical mystery tour... I don't think I give our position away too much by saying the first stop was Gibraltar! I'd never been, but obviously seen lots of pictures... But Mrs H is a brave woman, exposing those monkeys to Sherlock ;) Doesn't she know if all the monkeys leave the rock then Gibraltar will no longer be under British rule??

Anyway...  what happened next....

27 August 2012

Upon a summer wind there's a certain melody.

We're here. As you may know.

The villa's down a track. I expect half of Mrs H's employees are camped out in the bushes or something. Then, when you get around the villa, there's a terrace and a lawn, with a big hammock slung between two trees, and a pool that looks out over the sea.

The actual beach is down the road a bit, but an easy walk. Sherlock looked like he'd just clamber down through the rocks and bushes, but we're trying to persuade him not to.

He was literally about to burst, so Mycroft kindly said he'd go in the pool with Sherlock while we unpacked a bit and figured out how everything worked.

Of course, the morning had started a long, long time ago...

25 August 2012

I think I'm a banana tree, oh dear

The other day I was shocked to hear about the shootings outside the Empire State Building. It sounded like another person had gone on a crazed rampage with a gun, shooting innocent people.

I heard the new today that the gunman was waiting for his victim, stepped out and shot him. That's horrific, clearly, but it was also - like almost all murders - targeted, not just a random incident.

And then the two police officers who happened to be close by opened fire and shot a further nine people.

23 August 2012

Hello Darkness My Old Friend

I made that tomato thing the other night. It was nice. Probably nicer cold, actually, the next day.

Work's...busy, I suppose. As predicted, my mind isn't exactly on it as much as it should be.

Had to go and visit the mortuary this morning. Molly gave me a hug, said I looked like I needed it and that she'd read what happened.

It's sort of...don't know, feels like it's not really happening, in some ways.

20 August 2012

Pour Myself A Cup Of Ambition.

Just posted this as a blank entry. Which probably sums up my mental state, but isn't what I intended.

Work... yeah. Nice to be back with my team, but I've got lots to do. Sergeants can't do their own case load reviews, after all.

Tomorrow night I thought I'd make this tomato and almond tart - looks good.

Had a nice night last night - although it was a bit of a surprise to get a visitor. Laura was very nice. Very pleasant, pretty, charming, and I'm glad she dropped in. I hope John was glad, too. Even Sherlock warmed to her. Mycroft was slightly more reserved.

Anyway... no idea what else I was going to say. Just need to fall into bed before my eyes turn to grit and my mind goes blanker than it is already.

16 August 2012

This Wheel's On Fire, Rolling Down The Road

Day one of my driving course today.

We do work on a skid pan, but we also drive out on the roads with an instructor, as well as doing more high-speed stuff on a purpose built track. We also do pursuit scenarios.

As always, there's a lot of classroom stuff as well as driving. It's only a refresher for me, because I do on occasion have to do fast response driving or pursuit. It is quite interesting, and fairly fun, so can't ask for more than that, really.

Sherlock was very sweet earlier - he'd obviously been watching for me to get home, and ran down the street when I was parking the bike to ask if we could go and climb spider-web trees.

13 August 2012

You can walk, you can talk, you can fight

I'm feeling a bit better. You lot are good therapy. Or I really needed to break myself on that punchbag. One or the other.

Mycroft organising a bit of time for John and I alone was brilliant. We had such a good time together. I'm very glad to say that Mycroft and Sherlock both had a good time too.

The film was fantastic - sitting on a blanket in amongst the gravestones as night fell, watching on the big screen and hearing people shriek around us in the dark. It was perfect.

We also gave the degus a bath, and afterward they clearly decided they needed to get reacquainted...

9 August 2012

Feels like I'm flying above you

Last night was just amazing. We took off in the sunshine, and landed just before it got dark, but after the lights of London had all started twinkling below us. Sherlock loved it, Mycroft did too, even if he could have done with gagging Sherlock.

It just felt heavenly, floating along, leaning back on the basket, John in my arms... yeah, amazing.

Here's some pictures:

6 August 2012

There ought to be a law against, Anyone who takes offence

Sometimes I look at 'next blog' on my blog, just to see. That time it was a Jane Austen Fan Group.

I wonder why we were put next to them...Must be Greg The Florist - it is, after all, now an epic romance set in a country house...well, castle, but still.

Today was nice. Work first, then home to John and the boys. Sherlock immediately announced we were going to the park and dragged me to change and get ready.

We headed out with the dogs, and, slightly oddly, Mrs Hudson, too.

But when we got to the park it all became clear, as waiting for us on the swings were Jo, Lisa, a large camera and a boxfull of cupcakes.

So we ate, played, and were photographed. When it rained we hid in the big playhouse thingy that's part of the climbing frames, and Lisa caught on camera the moment Sherlock managed to fit a cupcake whole into his mouth.

Mrs Hudson also made some truly outrageous suggestions regarding her disappointment in 'Fifty Shades of Grey', as it wasn't, as she had thought, the same sort of book as Danger's Silver Fox 'erotica' book.

John said his first attempt at baking didn't go too well. Sherlock said the bits he ate were nice. I wouldn't be surprised if he didn't now sabotage a few more attempts to profit from the failures.

Mycroft and Sherlock bought me some very nice coffees to try. Mycroft's were single-origin beans, perfectly roasted and chosen carefully. Sherlock's was the sort of coffee that weasels eat and either regurgitate or poo out...not quite sure which. He's desperate to try it.

Sometimes soon we're going to go and decide which pictures from today we want as proper prints, and John says I have to pick a set for my desk - which will be lovely. And we might also get a couple for the flat.

It was a lovely afternoon.

Thank you for organising it, John. I love you.

(John also cooked dinner tonight, which was also lovely.)

(And I'm sorry for being grumpy recently. I don't know what's up with me, but I wish I'd snap out of it too.)