9 November 2012

The moon comes up...and the music calls

Nearly missed a day! But Sherlock is now asleep (he is currently bunched up in a tiny corner of his bed, asleep on his face, in a right tangle of arms and legs. I don't know how he can sleep like that!) John is looking like he might drop off at any minute. And I'm still annoyingly awake.

Tomorrow I have to try and write my appraisal, catch up on the latest paperwork, files, and try to get a bit further on a few cases.

I think it's amazing how forensically aware gangs are these days, and it's making life very difficult as an investigator.

What would you guys do if you'd shot someone, to try to destroy/hide evidence?

There's also doubtless ACPO reports and best practice recommendations stacking up. It can be hard to keep up with the cutting edge of evidence gathering/forensics when we're busy.

And there's talk of running some sort of course, as an SIO, for first responders, on identifying categories of death, and acting accordingly...because I've got so much free time to do that!

My head will be alphabet soup with all the acronyms by the end of tomorrow.

This is, of course, if no one gets murdered...


56 comments:

Anonymous said...

I can't even begin to tell you how much I envy the young's ability to sleep any place, any time, any where, any how.

Hope you all manage to get some sleep

Lancs. Anon

pandabob said...

right now I'd take information on how to hide evidence of murder but I'm guessing you're not for giving it ;-)

Good luck with all you have to do tomorrow and with getting some sleep tonight. :-)

John H. D. Watson said...

You keep messing with my hair, that's what's making me sleepy

Greg Lestrade said...

Lancs. - I can sleep pretty much anywhere, if forced to. But if I slept in the positions he tangles himself into I wouldn't be able to walk for a week.

AnonyBob - ha, well, it is interesting to hear what you lot think about things like murders... been in the job too long, me, so I think like a copper too much.

Danger - right, it's hair-messing that's making you tired, not the fact it's midnight....

John H. D. Watson said...

Is it really? I wasn't paying attention.

pandabob said...

seen as you're not going to tell me how to get away with murder Greg I guess I better try and sleep off my murderous intentions before morning ;-)

Greg Lestrade said...

mmm. 'tis.

Yeah, Anony, probably better that way in the long run.

John H. D. Watson said...

to try to destroy/hide evidence

I remember thinking a long time ago after watching some film or other that I'd definitely wear a hair net if I ever set out to kill someone...

Bed?

Greg Lestrade said...

...can't imagine you in a hair net.

Yeah, bed.

Non-criminal Anon said...

Well I wouldn't shoot someone in the first place; too messy and traceable. But if I did, I'd dig out the bullet and possibly try to obscure the entry wound.

Obviously the gun would be in the deepest part of the Thames asap...

Other than the usual, no fingerprints, etc. that's all I've got...

Greg Lestrade said...

what about forensic evidence on your clothes and skin from discharging the weapon, non-Criminal Anon (And everyone else, indeed.)

And would you scrabble about at the scene and try to pick up all the casings? Or would you run asap?

Non-criminal Anon said...

Two very good reasons why I would never shoot anyone!

I doubt I'd think of either. Clothes could be washed but I guess casings would have fingerprints...

Anonymous said...

I'd probably start by wearing used clothing and shoes, and then make sure they got tossed or burned as soon as possible. Don't know if it would work - does used clothing in the UK have that distinct "Goodwill" aroma that is so common here?

Sleep sounds good. I hope you both get some soon. Tangled with each other, mayhap?

rsf

Greg Lestrade said...

Yeah, and you've got to get to and from your crime scene, meet your victim, check for surveillance...if you carry a phone, it could be traced... there's lots to think about. And yet some of them almost manage it...

Non-criminal Anon said...

Hm, well I don't generally carry a phone, but CCTV could prove my (hypothetical) downfall! I read somewhere we're the most surveilled country in the world; dunno if its' true?

piplover said...

Is murdering someone in the buff a possibility? Because that way there's definitely no clothing to trace, you just take a shower and the evidence is down the drain.

Or, if the person is someone who works in a place where blood is common. Doctors, nurses, vets, butchers. It would be very easy to hide a lot of blood if you work in that kind of field.

As for getting rid of the evidence, I probably wouldn't use a gun, too traceable. If I did, though, I wouldn't take the casings with me, too easy to find. I would probably try to dump them in the Thames or bury them or put them in a skip. If one wasn't available, the nearest patch of bushes or roses. Anyplace out of the ordinary that would make it hard to spot them.

If I was going to stab someone I would use an ice cycle. That way the evidence would melt and leave no traces. Don't think that would be too easy to do in regular London, though.

Sorry, I'm not very imaginative, lol. I hope your day isn't as hectic as it sounds!

kholly said...

Do you find all the police procedural shows frustrating for giving away your secrets? Or are the shows fake enough that it doesn't really matter. I know that the things I happen to know about TV usually gets wrong so maybe they're getting your stuff wrong too.

Small Hobbit said...

piplover - murdering people in the buff might sort out the clothes bit, but you might find it difficult to blend in with the general population on your way to and from the crime. Either that or say to your proposed victim "please wait while I take my clothes off".

Greg Lestrade said...

Actually, showering/washing isn't very likely to remove all the gunshot residue. Although it will remove a good deal of it.

Kholly - not really, I mean, criminals are getting cleverer as fast as the scientists are, in terms of avoiding what the scientists can detect, but most criminals, happily, just aren't very bright still :)

I've never had a victim stabbed with an icicle. I can't imagine quite how that would work... you'd need to try to keep the ice fairly sharp, which would be very hard, as the thin edges would melt, and the amount of force needed to stab someone is quite high, I think it would snap.


Is there anything worse than trying to write your own review?

Anonymous said...

Is that standard practice then, writing your own appraisal? Just seems a bit, em, odd!

Greg Lestrade said...

Well, not just me! I don't get to just write 'Lestrade is great' and submit it :)

I have to write one on my own performance, and then my DCI also writes one. It's meant to check I'm not delusional, I think, or something. Anyway, obviously, ideally they're not too different, but it would be nice if his was helpful...sometimes they're not. At all.

Anyway, getting there with it.

Anonymous said...

It works much the same way in teaching. People set targets that they then mostly don't think about for 11 months and three weeks - most common question asked in October: 'You don't have a copy of my targets do you? I can't quite seem to find my copy...' Certainly in a lot of schools it's like some big, unfunny pantomime!

Hope you soon get it finished!

Anonymous said...

Hah! I was wondering but that makes sense I guess!

In what way are his unhelpful? Vague or buzzwordy or just he can't be arsed?

Greg Lestrade said...

Not just his, in general - they're bad if they don't tell you anything you wrote in your own one :)

Or yeah, if they're full of buzzwords or just...don't really mean much. Lots of words, very little information...

Small Hobbit said...

Can I copy yours when you've done? I need to write one by Tuesday and haven't made a start.

And how to phrase my bad points in a positive light? Or shall I just say I get very grumpy when dealing with idiots and have too much work to do?

Lestrade said...

I've been saved from it by a dead body. S, won't have it finished sorry.

Jaws said...

You are strict in regards to deadlines and try to motivate others to conform to your same high standards?

Yes I write a lot of these too

Sherlock said...

That sounds stupid, you just shouldn't do them.

pandabob said...

Sounds like your day got a bit more interesting Greg! here's hoping its not too horrid or complicated a case.

Anonymous said...

I hate writing my own performance review things too. I hope the dead body is interesting, but readily solvable.

rsf

Lestrade said...

Be a littlw late home, not much.

You had a nice day, John and Sherlock?

pandabob said...

You alright Greg?

Greg Lestrade said...

Yeah, sorry, wrecked my phone earlier.

Changed it for a new one now. And on the way home.

Greg Lestrade said...

(phone comment was if you were worried because I wasn't logged in.)

pandabob said...

Well yes I was actually so thanks :-)

Glad you're ok and on your way home :-)

John H. D. Watson said...

What happened to the phone?

Greg Lestrade said...

Dropped it down the toilet. Don't ask.

John H. D. Watson said...

All right. I really want to though...

Greg Lestrade said...

Well, it's not very exciting... dropped it...got it out, it didn't work, got issued a new one...

John H. D. Watson said...

I thought maybe you were in hot pursuit of a criminal. Near a toilet.

Greg Lestrade said...

Nothing so exciting, although plenty of people have been providing reasons what I might have been getting up to.

John H. D. Watson said...

All more interesting than the truth I assume?

Greg Lestrade said...

Oh yes. And then working out ways you'd kill me.

John H. D. Watson said...

Kill you for what?

Greg Lestrade said...

The interesting things I'd been getting up to in toilets...

John H. D. Watson said...

...Sometimes I really question the intelligence of the people you work with.

Greg Lestrade said...

Yeah, they should know I'm too much of a romantic to be showing my date a good time in a grubby toilet.

John H. D. Watson said...

Most of them have known you longer than I have! They ought to know better.

Sorry. The things you have to put up with make me so angry sometimes.

Greg Lestrade said...

Oh, you must've heard way worse in the army, surely? Isn't homophobia practically a hobby for most squaddies?

Most of it's fairly good humoured that I get.

pandabob said...

good humoured homophobia is still bloody homophobia :-(

You really shouldn't have to put up with it!

Greg Lestrade said...

Yeah, I know. And occasionally feel bad that I don't do anything about it.

pandabob said...

bollocks to that!

don't you dare feel bad about not doing anything about it its not responsiblity to stop it someone who isn't the (I hate the word) victim of it should be sorting it.

John H. D. Watson said...

Oh, you must've heard way worse in the army, surely?

Yeah...but also no, because it wasn't directed at you.

Anonymous said...

Teasing about dropping your phone into a toilet is likely to have some element of "naughty things people get up to in toilets" attached. But at least its teasing with "you belong to John Watson" attached, so that's something.

Greg Lestrade said...

Ah, well, thanks. And that's really nice - seriously. But I'm fine.

AnonyBob - you're brilliant, you make me laugh - in the best way. Thank you.

pandabob said...

glad to be of service ;-)

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