30 November 2011

and i'm not too old to rock and roll, and i'm not really scared of turning thirty...

Piplover asked a very good question: If, when they're older, and they asked, you could give one piece of advise to the boys on sex, what would it be? Not necessarily based on your own experience, but something you wish you had known, or someone had told you when you were younger.

So...I shall try to answer. It's a bit...difficult. And I talk a bit about sexual assault, so I don't want to upset anyone - dont read it if you don't want.

29 November 2011

Taking me back down the road that leads back to you, 29 Palms - I feel the heat of your desert heart

As most of you will know, I crawled home (not quite literally, although it was close) just before lunchtime with a crippling migraine. Half of me was sad that John wasn't here, because it's nice to be with him and he'd have been all lovely and caring to me. But half of me was glad that for once the flat was empty and quiet and I could be pathetic in private.

Anyway, feel a lot better now.

So, as none of you have fessed up and asked a question on Lestallion's Upstanding Column of Knowledge, I'll have to talk about the next best thing to sex. Bikes.

Rider asked:

What was your first bike Lestrade?

28 November 2011

I'm not your average beat boy, I'm not your rebel guy, You want to make us hated, You want to make us slide, no clause 28

Well, the video is a...piece of history? I may have worn things like that and danced in a similar style. Possibly. I couldn't possibly say. And only 15 years later did they realise the song was right and final repeal the act...

I'm trying to remember any other questions I've been asked. Some of them do have very short answers, so I've sort of not answered them.

Did I ever want to play a different musical instrument? No, not really. I've played the drums a few times, and it's okay, but the guitar had it all for me, really.

What would I do with a year off...I literally have no idea. I mean, not with my life the way it is. I suppose...I suppose I'd love to just head off, on my bike, with John and just...no plan, no destination, just following our noses. Maybe down through Africa, or right over to Asia - that would be amazing. But then so would a huge road trip around America or something. But obviously that can't happen with the boys. And I'd probably always fret I wasn't at work, if I'm honest!

As for who I'd have dinner with...I honestly can't think of anyone. Which sounds awful! But I'm not exactly up on history, and...well, I can't think of one person. I can think of hundreds, but I don't really know enough about any of them to know if they're good choices!

So, briefly, Nameless said: But, for the record, I for one would not have a fit of the vapours if you chose to share your most ridiculous/funny/OMG-I-can't-believe-I-did-that sexual encounter with us...

27 November 2011

On twenty-seven street nothing will keep you warm, everything will bring you harm

I've been researching, slightly, piercings. As always, there's stories from every side of the argument. Some people say it really hurts, others say it doesn't. I think I'd be all right. I can't pretend I enjoy pain that much, but I think I'd enjoy the results!

And I've found a whole world of different 'jewellery' that you can put in to keep it as discreet as possible when you want - weird soft 'filaments' of see through plasticy stuff, to keep the piercings open when you don't want to wear shiny metal bars or rings. If that had existed back in the day I'd probably already have it done. So now my main concern lies with healing time...I don't want to have painful nipples forever. And I definitely don't want to risk injury via fighting some suspect. I think work will always require very discreet jewellery. Which is fine once healed and I can change it. Less ideal during the first few months. I suppose I'll just ask whoever does it (if I get it done) for advice.

New poll up, by the way.

Question today: DW asked 'Big spoon or little spoon' and then qualified it with 'both in bed or sprawling'. I shall admit to not knowing what that meant at first...I've never seen it referred to, really. But anyway, obvious once you Google it know.

26 November 2011

I emptied every bottle when I poured I never missed, Had bloodshot eyes at twenty five, or was it twenty six.

Today was great fun.

Sally and her sister dropped off the kids, gave us quick lessons in bottles, nappies, how long naps were for/what times, essential teddy bears, that sort of thing. There were a few tears when they left - as we'd been warned there would be, but some swift distractions and we were all good again.

Sherlock looked slightly horrified.

But we had a great day - some of which is catalogued on Danger's Post. And it was sort of hard to let them go - although Sherlock didn't think so.

So, as a result of me commenting that the baby had taken a liking to my ear, and that I was glad I didn't still wear earrings, Nameless asked:

would you ever get your ears pierced again? Do you have any other piercings? Ever been tempted/likely to get anything pierced?

And as no one has chosen to ask further questions on Lestallion's Love-In (Which seems to be taking on more titles as the day goes on), I shall answer that.

25 November 2011

Did I tell you I was 25, and did I mention that I loved you since the other night.

Two twenty five titles in a day. Gosh.

Right. Well. Let's go with Anon's question.

Have you ever been attracted to a woman? Or if the answer is no, which would be a short story, do you prefer to bottom or top with a man?

You really don't have to click to read the rest. I'll be over here, waiting for a barrage of questions from Sherlock. Or John. Or you lot.

And it's twenty five to midnight and fifteen miles of track.

The almost-quote for today's post was 'Is there anything in the future that can possibly console us for not being always twenty-five?'

Which didn't make the cut because I'm happier now than I was at 25.

Our talk went fine. Some of them seemed interested, some bored, some asked questions, others sat in silence. The usual. If it makes even one of them think a bit harder about road safety it's a good thing. And I think they learnt a few thigns about the causes of accidents - and the causes of injuries/deaths in accidents. So.

(some of them asked a lot more questions about the bike, afterward, than about the road safety, during...not quite what I was hoping for!)

Then we had lunch with Mycroft, which was great. I hope he didn't mind being seen spending his lunch hour with a couple of old blokes, cramping his style.

And...and I started all this for a purpose and now I don't want to go through with it, which makes me feel more of an idiot than I felt already. Think I need to go for a run or something before fetching Sherlock. So I'll answer a question later on.

24 November 2011

There's twenty-four reasons To admit that I'm wrong With all my excuses Still twenty-four strong

First, congratulations to John. I'm sure you've already seen his news. He will be brilliant, I'm certain. The people of London are lucky to have him working for them. (As we are lucky to have him the rest of the time).

Second, in comments some of you will have seen that we had a bit of a result today - a huge police op running all over London today collared someone we've had a warrant out for for a while now, so very very pleased about that.

Thirdly...thirdly. Question. I suppose it makes sense to carry on from yesterday.

Nameless said, after yesterday's post: OK, please count "Why/when/how/etc has it seemed like you might have had to give up policing?" as my next question. I'm burning with curiosity here. 

23 November 2011

Twenty-three and it's so sad to me, you tell the world I'm dead to you.

As most of you know, Sherlock clambered into bed with us last night, all sad and wanting hugs. He was pretty warm, so John sorted out medicine, I got him some water, and we wrapped him up inbetween us. He wriggled. A lot. He always does, but feeling all out of sorts and uncomfortable and feverish he was even more wriggly than usual.

We're just glad he seeks us out when he needs us.

So, early this morning when I dragged myself onto the freezing fog filled streets, the world looked a bit like this:

That's Westminster bridge and NOT Big Ben (Sherlock insists I don't call it that, because that's not its name, even though that's what you'll probably all know it as...) It's the clock tower of the Palace of Westminster.

Did fairly tedious work all day - essential, but tedious - drank too much coffee, fretted over two of my favourite boys, came home, cooked dinner, tried to persuade my boyfriend he is far, far from useless and am currently being sat on by Sherlock, who is wrapped in a blanket and still in his pyjamas.

Today's question:

DW asked "Why/how you became a cop."

22 November 2011

And I am two-and-twenty, And oh, ’tis true, ’tis true.

Blog title courtesy of my darling boyfriend.

Just a quick post, as poor Sherlock is a bundle of misery on the sofa. He's got a bit of a temperature, and apparently Mrs T said he seemed subdued this afternoon. Happily we know an excellent doctor...

John's also had a bit of a low day, so it's hugs all around tonight.

Thought I'd knock off some of the quicker questions -

Favourite thing to have Marmite on? Hot buttered crumpets. Amazing. Just enough to make your mouth sting a bit, oozing out on a sea of butter and soaked right into the crumpet.

Have I been to see Rocky Horror Show - no, sorry!

How nosy to I think you all are...In my job, being nosy is an attribute, and I think you're all very restrained.

And what would I like to cook that I've never had time for... well, I've cooked a lot of things. I dont generally follow recipes much, I tend to just make it up as I go along. But one day I'd like to try a 3 or 5 bird roast. If I can find enough people to eat it. And a big enough oven.

I bet Greg the Florist's new castle has a big oven...

21 November 2011

Twenty-one and strong as I can be, I know what freedom means to me

Today was a real rollercoaster of emotions. We made an arrest on the case - our second. The first was immediate upon discovering the body. This finally meant we believed we were ready to release the body for burial. It's...hard. There aren't many places in the UK that still bury bodies in communal pauper's graves. Some boroughs of London do. I think that might be where that child ends up. None of the relatives seemed in a position to do much else.

All we can do is put them in touch with as many support networks and charities as we know of.

Another case where the law may have been served, but no one feels much better about it.

Anyway... enough of being down.

There was a great call for The Cow in the Pond story that Sally mentioned. How she knows about it I don't know - she was probably still in primary school. Or school, anyway.


20 November 2011

There are twenty years to go, And many friends I hope. Though some may hold the rose some hold the rope

Firstly, a misty picture from the park this morning.

 Having a lovely day. Mainly walking, cooking with Mycroft, eating, restraining Danger from running down to the O2 and jumping on Federicorn, air guitaring with Sherlock, all the things Sundays should be about.

Last night was great. John had arranged dinner out, which was lovely and peaceful and romantic. So then I dragged him off to a loud, dirty, sweaty club, which was more raunch than romance.

Four police officers were stabbed yesterday, up in Harrow. A bloke they were trying to talk to ran into a butchers and grabbed a knife. Three of them are still in hospital, the fourth has been released. Whenever I hear about things like that it makes me so angry that we've only got the money to send out single-person patrols. It took four of them to subdue him, and all sustained serious injuries. Imagine if it had just been one officer. Imagine the havoc he could have caused on a busy Saturday shopping street.

Anyway, anger about the job aside, and trying to convince my idiotic brain that just because one bloke with a knife has been arrested in Harrow it doesn't actually mean Harrow will now become a mecca for all madmen with knives, let's get on with the post..


19 November 2011

All I ever wanted to do was lie around in bed with you, I was only nineteen, only nineteen.

Innie asked what I think of when I hear 'Luxurious' or 'indulgent'.

So, lying in bed this morning, chatting to John about what to do all day, it struck me that that, now, is sort of both. Just being in bed, with nothing specific to do.

I love the feel of soft cotton on my skin, especially when it's warm. I really like being comfy and warm. It makes me feel safe.

Whenn I was little and all the madness that was our house got too much for me I'd climb into the cupboard where Mum stored the sheets and towels and stuff - warm from the immersion heater - and just burrow into it all. The house was often cold, we were often cold, and this was like a little safe cocoon where I could escape everything.

So although it doesn't sound much, I think of warmth and softness as being luxurious now. But not in a fur-rug-in-front-of-a-fire way. I mean, that might be nice, I don't know. But I prefer to be wrapped up in something. It's why I like old baggy jeans and fleecy soft hoodies, I suppose.

Indulgence for me is all about food and drink.

Dessert wine is truly indulgent. Rich and sweet and perfect. Or really good coffee. Perfectly cooked meat, and most important, time and good company to enjoy it all.

Time, I think, is the most luxuriant and indulgent thing of all. And something my job frequently drives home is the fact you need to enjoy it whenever you've got it. As such, today has been a perfect mix of a bit of a lie in (thank you Mycroft), a long, luxurious breakfast of pastries and coffee, then ice skating and a wander around the Natural History Museum. The best company, the nicest day. Wonderful.

As I posted the other day - "Time Goes, you say? Ah no! Alas time stays....we go.'

18 November 2011

I got a baby's brain and an old man's heart took eighteen years to get this far

You know some times you just feel...safe and content? At the moment I feel like that. It's taken a long time to feel like this again. In fact, happened very rarely in my life.

Mycroft's here, there's a very heavy dog drooling slightly on one of my feet, Danger's sprawled over my other leg, Sherlock's drawing something on the floor next to another dog. It's just a sea of calm and contentedness and dogs in our living room.

Mycroft asked about the case earlier. Assured me I could talk about it if it would help. Often hard to remember he's the teenager.

They've been doing a lot of things at school, about talking about your problems. Sensible, I suppose, given they're all suddenly living together and away from home and all that.

So... Don't read this bit if you don't want. 

But I won't say anything graphic. As with most cases involving children, it's not a stranger that's committed this crime. And the original investigation made some serious errors. In my view, those errors were unforgivable. However, it was - is - a difficult case. The child's body wasn't found for some time - was concealed, in fact, by members of the family. So it's not...oh, whatever I say sounds callous or too gruesome to tell you. You can all imagine what I mean.

The report was hard enough to read. Visiting the pathologist yesterday, seeing the body...it's just something that's hard to deal with no matter how long you've been in the job, or how many bodies you've seen. The combination of factors... Anyway, talking to John yesterday afterward helped. Baking with Sherlock was a brilliant distraction - as are all of you, and the silly comments here, and Lestallion. It really does all help to pull me out of myself, move from work to home, be a nicer person to be around, I hope. So...well, yeah, thanks to you all. Thanks to Sherlock. Thanks to John, especially, for letting me fill his head with thoughts he doesn't need to be having, and for making it okay for me not to hold it all together for a few minutes, and react like a human, not like a police officer. Taken a while, but because of his patience and understanding and caring I do feel safe telling him most things, and letting my emotions show.

Now onto today's question. - I'm sorry, I'm sure someone asked me this, but I can't find the comment. So shout out if it was you. (And please, ask more questions! We're only just over halfway through the month!)
So, paraphrased, it was something like 'What are some of your favourite places in London.'

17 November 2011

It takes seventeen muscles to smile, and forty three to frown.

So I give my face a good workout every day.

Because work is completely horrible, lets move on to another question. Well, half a question, because I've already answered the other half.

Nameless asked about Danny and about the fire at our house. So I've answered the Danny bit...now onto the other bit.

I thought it might be hard to write about, but actually, because it doesn't feel at all like it happened to me, it's not really. Feels like something I watched on TV or something.

16 November 2011

And I'll do anything For my sweet sixteen

Sorry, no question to answer tonight. Barely even a blog post.

Work is hard right now - difficult case, really taking it out of all of us. And I wasn't exactly on top form to begin with.

John's plotting something. He's persuaded Sally to babysit Sherlock and Mycroft (well, Mycroft is fairly self-sufficient.) I mean, I know why we're going out - or think I do - but no idea where or anything. I hope she survives. She's a good sergeant.

John is, as always, being amazing and supportive and just...brilliant. Despite that, I'm finding it slightly hard to cope with...everything, really. Which is hard to admit. I'm just used to being able to hide away on my own and that's not an option now.

And I imagine it's better for me to crawl into bed and have a hug than hide away cuddling the Scotch bottle anyway.

Speaking of which, I'm going to drag myself (and hopefully John) to bed.

15 November 2011

Fifteen minutes of fame

The first part of my day was hilarious, if...surprising. My team really did buy/aquire a pony tail (I'll leave it to your imagination regarding how one...'wears' it.) and a riding crop. I had to laugh. I mean, I bring it upon myself with this blog, right?

And then everything went rapidly downhill because we've been given a case that's all gone pretty wrong. We've inherited it because the Super isn't happy with the investigation. It's a horrible case, and it's secondhand so all the evidence isn't as we'd like it - no chance to visit crime scenes, none of that. Anyway, don't want to think about it.

So, leading on from my first paragraph, Anon Without A Name said... "If you care to talk about it at some point, I'd be interested to know what impact you think that blogging so openly about your life has had on you."

14 November 2011

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.

This is Sherlock and the title isn't mine Lestrade said it had to have fourteen in it so he put it on before I could write my bit.

The pond is good and there are already insects and things on the water but we couldn't see anything swimming in it, but it's still a bit cloudy from all the new gravel and everything an Mrs T says we have to be patient because it's winter soon and spring will be the time when everything really wants to move in.

Lestrade and John say I can keep updating and I'll put pictures up too.

Right, now my turn again. Thought today it would be fitting to answer Piplover's question: what is your favorite season? I love autumn, summer and winter, but spring is by far my favorite time of year. What do you love most about your favorite season?

13 November 2011

Thirteen. (Un)lucky for some.

Had a great day today. The pond is pretty much done, as far as we're concerned. Up to nature now – hope someone moves in and enjoys it!

Yesterday was brilliant too -fireworks on the river, then dinner out. It's been great weather and the mist last night seemed very Autumnal. Sherlock fell asleep on the way home, and even slept in a bit this morning.

So all this got me thinking about what my life was like a year ago, as REReader asked.

12 November 2011

A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.

Lindsay and Desert Wanderer both had great stories of not-so-intelligent criminals. So I thought I'd do a post about some of the top excuses I've been given. When Sal saw that, she insisted on getting in on it too, so she's emailed me some of these.

When I was first a detective, we'd caught a bloke who had tricked his way into a business and stolen a large amount of cash. The crime itself wasn't stupid - he'd had to blag his way in, keep it up, get the cash and leave. We had tip offs and some really quite poor video evidence - but we were pretty sure he was our man - however, you never know when someone will have a good enough brief to get them off. His face on the video really wasn't very clear.

It helped our case a lot that his brief had obviously told him to dress smartly and make a good impression on the court. Because he wore exactly the same suit, shirt and tie as he'd worn during the offence. Afterward he just shrugged and said he only had one set of smart clothes...


11 November 2011

When late morning rolls around and you're feeling a bit out of sorts, don't worry; you're probably just a little eleven o'clockish.

So, I was going to do a post on 'stupid things criminals have said to me', but Sal wanted in on it, so she's going to send me some to include, and anyway, something happened which...prompted me to answer a different one.

Nameless didn't really know what to ask, but part of it was about my little half-brother, Danny.

Danny's s younger than me. He's my half brother. He's got a little brother, Sam. Danny and I don't get on - have never got on, really. His Dad didn't really like me much, and I certainly didn't like him. But Mum married him anyway, told me I'd come round when I got to know him. I didn't. He got worse, not better. So that was the start of Danny and I not getting along.

Then he got older, and Mum got worse, and...well, he didn't like me telling him what to do. So we argued a lot, we occasionally had fights. Probably a bit more than occasionally. It seemed like occasionally at the time, but now I know that most families didn't fight quite as much as we seemed to. Anyway, it didn't ever really get much better. I tried, a bit, but...well, some things seem insurmountable. The differences between Danny and I seem that way.

Today sort of highlighted that. Mum called, asking me if I could help Danny. Because he'd been arrested. So... well, I can't. I mean, there's nothing I can do for him. And I don't even know if I'd want to. Not because we don't get along, but because Danny's a mess, and maybe this will be a wake up call.

I wish it hadn't happened, because I wish his wife and kids hadn't been scared, I wish he hadn't cheated on her, I wish when he had he'd have acted sensibly and worked things out so at least he could see them all, peacefully. Not turn up outside their house and end up with her calling the police on him because he wouldn't stop harassing them and just leave (he didn't hurt them - his wife called Mum and told her what had happened. No one's spoken to Danny). But maybe this will make him realise he's the one with the problem, not them. I don't know. I've spoken to Nicky, and she's gone to see Mum. And there's nothing I can do except wait.

He's an idiot. But we're all idiots sometimes. I hope he learns something from all this.

10 November 2011

By the time I get to ten, I'm right back in your arms again.

(don't judge the song lyric today. Google provided.)

Today's been...the sort of day I don't even want to talk about.

So I wanted to answer a happy question. (I need more questions, or we'll move onto PACE rules and regs. You've been warned.)

X said:

Since John told us all about your first date, I'm going to be greedy/nosy and inquire into your and John's first kiss.

Or, alternately, YOUR first kiss. :D I'm feeling soppy tonight, what can I say? 

9 November 2011

Nine to five yeah they got you where they want to

Today's been trying to the extreme. A trial my team have a big part of was declared a mistrial today, because the accused's friends have been threatening jury members and witnesses. So that's just masses of time and money wasted, and it'll now go to retrial at some points, probably with fewer witnesses now wondering if it's worth testifying.

Happily I came home to Danger having cooked a lovely meal, which made my day infinitely better. Well, just coming home to him does that anyway, but with dinner ready it's even better.

Tink's turn today.


If you could go back in time to give yourself advice, when would you go back to and what advice would you give?

Would you ever let Sally make an actual guest post, as opposed to her popping on when you've forgotten to log off?

Has work settled down on the 'he's dating a guy' thing?

8 November 2011

Sleep is an eight-hour peep show of infantile erotica.

Anyone want to take bets on which day I'll fail to find a number-related quote?

So, yesterday was brilliant. Spent time resting, playing my guitar for Danger and we even found time for a jog in the afternoon.

Today was also nice, although the weather was a bit miserable. Let my bike take Danger for a ride again. I'm worried they like each other a little too much. Won't need me soon.

Anyway, onto today's subject. 'That Bar'.

Elizabeth said:

Lestrade: What was it like working in the bar? (You have to tell us what its name was! Or at least give us a list of possibilities and tell us when we've hit the right one.)

7 November 2011

Fall seven times. Stand up eight.

Right. Onto a bit of a harder one today, because I'm all snug and content on the sofa and not writing this alone in my office.


what's the worst date you've ever been on? Maybe apart from Bryan stories (unless you want) as, given what a right shit he is I'm sure there were some miserable dates.

Firstly - and not in the interests of defending him, but perhaps defending myself, dating Bryan was mainly fun, often brilliant, generally interesting, and overall a good time. I wouldn't have married him if he'd been a shit then. We went to a lot of gigs, art shows, out with friends, mad adventures.

It was years later all that stopped, long after the dates stopped.

Anyway, worst date - well, it wasn't a date, really. Didn't go on too many of those, if I'm honest. Not for lack of trying, but it wasn't easy once I'd joined up.

6 November 2011

Whenever two people meet, there are really six people present.

Whenever two people meet, there are really six people present. There is each man as he sees himself, each man as the other person sees him, and each man as he really is.

(I'm determined that I will manage to get the correct number in every post title. Don't ask me why. I seriously fear I might fail. But this quote seemed rather apt.)

So, because I'm lazing on the sofa today, I thought I'd do a slightly difficult (technically, not emotionally) post today.

Desert Wanderer said... 
 If you were to make a mix tape for John, what would be on it?

And I couldn't just list tracks and then leave you to try to find them. So I'm going to try to use all my technical (lack of) expertise and put videos up. I hope this works.

There could be hundreds more. This is just a taste.

5 November 2011

A hero is no braver than an ordinary man, but he is braver five minutes longer.

 Small Hobbit said..
How about who your biking heroes are and why? 
There are current riders I like. Guy Martin, Valentino Rossi - Marco Simoncelli, until he died tragically a couple of weeks ago. And many more, for different reasons.
But when I was young, and for many many reasons, my hero was Joey Dunlop.

He was an amazing rider - he won three hat-tricks at the Isle of Man TT and I don't think there were many years he didn't win at least one race.

Sadly he died racing, in an accident in 2000. Gone but not forgotten - the most succesful rider at the TT now gets awarded the 'Joey Dunlop Cup'. 50,000 people showed up to his funeral. Bikers from all over the world, people from his home town, friends, colleagues, fans - everyone.

But he wasn't just a rider. He also worked tirelessly for charity. He never mentioned it, and ensured his trips all happened on the off-season for racing. He used his team truck for his bikes to drive to Bosnia or Romania, taking food and supplies, and helped Romanian orphanages. He said he was more proud of his charirty work than his racing, despite almost no one knowing he did it.

In 1986 he got an MBE for his services to racing. In 1996 he got an OBE for his charity work.
An amazing man.
There you go. As always, feel free to ask more questions. Comments help the nightshift go faster... (apologies if I disappear like I did last night. Those damn criminals demanding my time).

For the foreigners...

An incidental post for a picture.

As I'm here, thought those of you who aren't here might like an iconic London-by-night pcture.

Left-Right, The London Eye, or whatever it's called now, Palace of Westminster (The Houses of Parliament), the clock tower (Big Ben), and the Thames.

Note the lack of people we were looking for.

4 November 2011

May the fourth be with you.

(Yes, I'm struggling with my numbered titles.)

So, this may not make as much sense as it ought to, because it's a hard question and I've only had one cup of coffee since waking up.

Desert Wanderer wanted to know something I'm unexpectedly grateful for.

Which...wow. Big question. i hope I've understood it correctly...maybe I'm just 'grateful', rather than 'unexpectedly grateful'. I dont know...anyway.

What immediately springs to mind is 'everything my life is right now'. But that's not very helpful.

I think you all know well enough how grateful I am to John and the boys, so I thought I'd cast slightly further afield.

Im grateful for my sister, Nicky. I don't quite know how to put it, but...if I was her, I'm not sure I'd be as supportive of me as she is.

I can virtually hear the rattle of her keyboard as she starts disagreeing with me...

We were a bit of a team growing up, but, being the oldest (and being a boy) I tended to be 'in charge' a lot. And I can see how some siblings wouldn't like that much. It's no secret Danny and I never exactly got on. It's hard enough being told what to do by your parents, let alone by your older brother.

I made a lot of mistakes, I made a lot of stupid decisions, I didn't know what I was doing most of the time, and in the end I left all that for her to deal with and ran away to London.

And still, despite all that, she's been the most supportive of me that you could ever wish for.

Even when times with Bryan were bad and I basically cut myself off from her - and everyone else - because I didn't want them to see what I had become, even then, she was there for me, and when we finally parted, she didn't say a word about what a shit I'd been to her, she was just still there for me.

So I didn't expect her to do any of that for me...and I'm very very grateful that she did. And that she gets on so well with John, and all of that. She's a fantastic sister.

3 November 2011

Third time. Lucky.

Right, a couple today.

Do I intend to go to Pride with John and the boys again - Yes. Provided they're happy to, I would love to. I do have certain reservations about a lot of gay culture, and a lot of how gay culture is perceived. (for instance, I've never been 'proud' to be gay any more than any of you are proud to be straight, sexual, asexual, bi, or whatever you are. It's not a choice, it's not like other things I've worked hard to acheive and am therefore proud of. It's just how I am. I am, however, happy to honour the fight that people have fought to get us to a point where, whilst not universally accepted, being gay is no longer the issue it once was. Things are changing for the better, year on year.) and it's amazing to be able to walk the streets holding my boyfriend's hand, with the boys, and no one to even spare us a glance. Don't think there's any other day of the year we can do that.

And now, onto 'John's most endearing quality'.

Thought about this one a lot. He's got a lot of endearing qualities.

But the one I've picked to come out tops is that he cares. He cares about the important things. He cares about the people in his life. He cares about me, the boys, all of you. He cares about people he meets at the school gates, the security, the neighbours, people he sees in the street, my team, people on the news...the list could go on.

Sometimes I worry he cares too much. How can one person have that capacity? But he does. And I don't think he even realises it.

I don't want to compare him to Bryan - there really is no comparison to be had - but after the crash, when I was in hospital, he showed up, saw me, sat with me, found out about how I was doing, checked on Sally, and finally got me out of there to take care of at home.

Time before that, when I was in hospital after a bike crash, Bryan showed up in the evening, took my bank card, said there was no point me leaving hospital until I was capable of looking after myself and buggered off.

No, I don't know what I was doing with him either.

Anyway, there you go. Comments, questions, suggestions on a post card. Or in comments.

2 November 2011

Seconds out

Right. Calliope, your turn.

What is your dream holiday destination. (possibly paraphrased - I only just looked at it and have already forgotten).

This is a hard question! I'm assuming money and time is no problem, so...

At first I thought of a lovely tropical island. I do like the sun, I love swimming in the sea, and would love to go somewhere where the water was crystal clear and there were reefs and fish and wildlife to look at.

But I also love snow when it's proper big fluffy snow you can have fun in, rather than try to battle to work through. So somewhere cold and beautiful would be good too...or somewhere really insanely desolate. I'd love to go to the arctic or antarctic. Not to trek anywhere too extreme, but just to see the place - maybe stand on top of the world.

I haven't really been to many places in the world. Europe a bit, Italy a lot, and odd other places but it would be nice to go places with someone, and I imagine visiting new places with the boys would be quite amazing, because the way they see the world is so different anyway.

Reading through those I've realised that my dream holiday essentially is beautiful desolation. I'd like the people I love to be there, and no one else. Ha. Cant imagine anything worse than somewhere crowded with people - especially other tourists. Obviously locals would be allowed to stay...

1 November 2011

At first I was afraid...

Right. Well, at least I wasn't met with a stony silence on my requests post. Not that I ever worried about such a thing...

In answer to, er, Nameless's(?) question, you can just ask a question once and I'll try to remember/check back. But equally, don't feel like you're nagging if you want to ask again because you think I've forgotten. Right?

So today, because it's topical, I thought I'd go with:

Lupe said...

In the spirit of Halloween and All Saint's Day and Día de muertos, what about a scary story? Something weird or could-be supernatural that's happened to you? :D Have you ever been inside a haunted house? Have you ever seen a ghost or something that could be a ghost? :3 Or maybe a local tale from your home town? :D Please? *v*