The first part of my day was hilarious, if...surprising. My team really did buy/aquire a pony tail (I'll leave it to your imagination regarding how one...'wears' it.) and a riding crop. I had to laugh. I mean, I bring it upon myself with this blog, right?
And then everything went rapidly downhill because we've been given a case that's all gone pretty wrong. We've inherited it because the Super isn't happy with the investigation. It's a horrible case, and it's secondhand so all the evidence isn't as we'd like it - no chance to visit crime scenes, none of that. Anyway, don't want to think about it.
So, leading on from my first paragraph, Anon Without A Name said... "If you care to talk about it at some point, I'd be interested to know what impact you think that blogging so openly about your life has had on you."
Well, 'toys' aside, I think it's been mainly good. Not really the impact of other people finding things out like that - which is fair game. But the way you've all helped me find out about myself.
I won't say it's been easy all the time. Back in April...well. I nearly jacked it all in. Mind you, at the time I thought John was going to give me the heave-ho, so there wouldn't have been much point continuing. It's one thing making massive relationship-ending mistakes to someone's face. Quite another to do it all over the internet in front of an audience of however many. So...well, I think in some ways it did help, because you all gave me a lot of good advice, and you were all cheering us on to sort it all out, which was really nice, and gave me the confidence I was seriously lacking at the time.
But obviously you didn't know the full situation at the time, and reading people saying I obviously still had latent feelings for Bryan... I can't even describe how that made me feel. Not that any of you could possibly have known any of what you do now, so it was fair comment at the time. Just very hard to take, sitting alone in a hotel room fairly sure I was about to be dumped via a comment box.
So...overall, this blog's been good. A bit like therapy, I suppose, in some ways. You've all helped me a lot. And it's really great to be able to share the wonderful turns my life has taken over the past year. I mean, if I didn't enjoy it, I wouldn't do it.
I know Nicky appreciates it too - she says she learns way more about what I'm doing from here than she ever would from a phonecall!