28 August 2011

Just like Mamma used to make...

In the sea just pipped outdoor swimming pool to the post in the last poll.

Apologies to all you who don't like swimming at all. I should've thought of that.


Today was D day. M Day, rather. We went to see my mother. Escorted, for safety, by Nicky. (Nicky - 'I've told her we're coming, and she's to be on her best behaviour'. Mum - 'It was only the one, to steady my nerves.' One bottle, I presume.)

Okay, she wasn't utterly pissed, but she wasn't exactly sober either. Which probably shouldn't have bothered me as much as I let it.

A lot of things probably shouldn't bother me as much as I let them.



Anyway, she seemed to like John, Mycroft and Sherlock. And, as you'd expect, Mycroft was incredibly polite and well mannered. Sherlock was...Sherlock. ('You smell like alcohol').

So we sat down, and it started okay, her asking questions, everyone drinking tea. Sherlock eating chocolate biscuits.

Then the kids went off to explore, because her house is pretty small and there were a lot of us (and dogs). So she took the opportunity to explain to me how disappointed she was Id 'given up' on my marriage, and how John was 'a very nice man', but clearly out of my league. And what was I even doing with these boys who were too bright, too posh and too good for the likes of me.

Things went on in a similar vein until it was a choice between raid her booze cupboard and nick her fags, like I would have done 30 years ago, or go and find out what the kids were doing. So I walked out. Which was grown up of me. And left John to face it all on his own. I know, I know, brave, aren't I?

As it turned out, Sherlock was just on his way in (presumably for more chocolate).

From what I gather, Sherlock then heard what she was saying to Nicky about me and decided he needed to give her his version of events. Quite loudly. And with his own...particular brand of straight forward honesty. But you'd have to ask John about that.

Anyway, at least she seemed to like them...even if they are out of my class.

As for the rest of the day, we had a lovely morning out at Clifton, and a great lunch in a pub with a big garden for the dogs to roam about in. And now we're all relaxing. Well, Mycroft and Carla are up in her room, doing computer-related things. Sherlock is playing a computer game with Paul, and we've cracked open a bottle of wine.I need it, to get over Arsenal's performance today.

54 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh Greg... *hugs* I'm so sorry that your own mother said that to you. I hope your heart understands that none of that (the "giving up" and what you "deserve") is true. You're great for John and the boys. You're happy and safe and loved. I just ... *hugs*

-A from NW

innie said...

So she took the opportunity to explain to me how disappointed she was Id 'given up' on my marriage, and how John was 'a very nice man', but clearly out of my league. And what was I even doing with these boys who were too bright, too posh and too good for the likes of me. Lovely as it would have been to have her be delighted at the odd and wonderful turns your life has taken recently, I want to make sure that you're clear on something: not one of those things is HER decision to make. Bryan was terrible for you and a bad person - you've done what you need to be free of him. John and the boys love you and want to be with you as much as they can - witness the "he's moving in!" celebrations. And we all think you're someone to look up to, not least for being able to balance a demanding family with a highly responsible job.

You've had to be the grown-up for so long - I'm sorry you had to do it again today, but at least it's done. Let John cuddle you and take Sherlock's words to heart.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Thanks.

I don't know. When I was little she'd tell me all the things she wanted to achieve in my life. All the things she didn't have.

And now I'm getting them she doesn't want me to have them.

I suppose it's hard for her to take, after the life she's had. I half think I should go back and see her on my own. But I don't want either of us to say things we'll regret.

mazarin221b said...

Well, that sucks. It seems that no matter how old you get, your parents issues can still get to you. I completely dodged a call from my mom just this morning. Let's just say that your mom and my mom have quite a bit in common, except I am her only child.

And, while a bit...not good for a 5 year old to speak his mind to adults like that on a regular basis, I'd take Sherlock's spirited defense for what it is - a declaration of his loyalty and love for you.

Sherlock said...

She'll forget about Bryan now because I got that picture of him and ripped it into small pieces and buried the pieces and Mycroft helped so don't just blame me.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Sherlock! That was...well, you shouldn't take other people's things. I arrest people for that. Right? So...don't do it again.

And Mycroft, I do people as accessories to a crime, too.

Mycroft said...

I'm not sorry. I don't think I'd be sorry even if we were arrested.

Lupe said...

*hugs*

And now I'm getting them she doesn't want me to have them.

I suppose it's hard for her to take, after the life she's had. I half think I should go back and see her on my own. But I don't want either of us to say things we'll regret.


That is very sad. Maybe not now, but with time, perhaps, you'll be able to talk to her. *hugs* Cheer up, Lestrade! You're awesome and your adorable boyfriend and kids clearly know, appreciate and treasure that. :)

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I'm not sorry either...and I know you won't transfer this one act to other situations. But Sherlock might. So...yeah, well, like I said to Sherlock, just don't do it again.

But thanks, both of you, because...well, for all that you can't choose your family, I'm bloody glad you've chosen me to be your friend.

John H. D. Watson said...

For what it's worth, I thought you did very well. You kept calm, and going out to be with the kids was probably the best choice.

You do know it's not true, right? Any of what she said?

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Yeah. Thanks.

John H. D. Watson said...

Good. I love you.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Love you too.

And sorry. I wanted...I don't know what I wanted. The impossible, I suspect.

Made you feel any better about me meeting yours?

John H. D. Watson said...

She might come round. A bit at least.

Not as such.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Didn't know if it would make it better or worse. Or a bit of both.

She might indeed come round. I might even decide I want to speak to her again to find out if she has.

innie said...

I admit it, I laughed when I read Sherlock's defiant confession and Mycroft's addendum. These boys are willing to go to the mat for you, L. You've got a family.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Yeah, they're all pretty special.

And I look forward to the conversation John will have with Sherlock about destroying other people's property tomorrow...

John H. D. Watson said...

Innie - I might have laughed a bit too. Discreetly.

L - neither really. Harry's right unfortunately. My mum's likely to feel similarly, but in the opposite direction. Maybe she and your mum should get together, cancel each other out.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I fail to see how anyone can think their son, who's a Doctor isn't good enough for a school-drop-out copper.

All I care about is you being happy with me. And as long as that's the case, everyone else can go hang.

Trills said...

You're BRILLIANT, Lestrade. Forget her. John agrees with me. Sherlock and Mycroft agrees with me. The whole internet agrees with me.

You deserve whole parades and we just won't invite her.

Anonymous said...

Greg - You hit the nail right on the head. And I'm glad it sounds like everyone is rallying around you to cheer you up.

Sherlock, Mycroft - Not that I'm encouraging a repeat of your behavior with the picture, but...well done, the two of you.

-A from NW

John H. D. Watson said...

All I care about is you being happy with me. And as long as that's the case, everyone else can go hang.

Good. Me too.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Sorry.

I'll try and cheer up.

Anything we want to do tomorrow? Before we go? Should take the dogs for a run before we pack them back in the car

John H. D. Watson said...

Yeah, that'd be good. In the park? What time do you want to leave? And should we stop on the way home to pick up Mycroft's school things or is that a bit much for one day?

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I think 2 and 3 depend what time we can persuade Carla to let Mycroft go.

I'm not sure the uniform shop will open on a bank holiday though. It seems far too old-fashioned...

John H. D. Watson said...

Heh. He set up Skype on her computer, did you know? Everyone at school's going to think he has a girlfriend, and an Older Woman at that.

Point. I'll call them in the morning. We could just wait and leave after lunch.

X said...

While it definitely is not appropriate behaviour in typical circumstances... Well done both of you, Mycroft and Sherlock, for destroying that picture. That made me laugh outright.

But listen to John and Greg and don't do it again ;)

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Yeah, she told me. With a very wide smile on her face.

I'm hoping it'll be good for him to have someone to talk to about it all who's roughly his age. Not us old farts. From what Nicky says, it'll definitely be good for Carla and her academic career, by the sound of it.

Want to head to bed? Can't imagine Sherlock will want to leave tomorrow, or let me go to work the next day. Or let Mycroft prepare for school. Or let you have any peace.

John H. D. Watson said...

I'm so glad they're getting along well.

Mmm, bed. Yes. There's something about having all four kids together that multiplies their power to wear me out.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

You're worn out?? I climbed a f'ing TREE today!

John H. D. Watson said...

Ha! Was it a big one? You never showed me. Oh, did anyone take pictures??

Rider said...

Ha! Was it a big one? did anyone take pictures

Seems like another chapter of Greg the Florist is due...

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I don't know. All I can say is that it seemed a good idea at the time. And then rapidly seemed like not-such-a-good-idea when I remembered I wasn't ten anymore. It was very big. I didn't get to the top.

One of the kids may have pictures.

None of them climbed the tree. It just didn't stack up to playing on the Wii. There's no bloody 'wii-trii climbing' game, is there? Kids these days....

John H. D. Watson said...

Wii-trii... If there's not, there should be. Maybe Mycroft can make one.

Rider - I knew someone was going to say that!

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Come to bed.

I'm not sure I want you to take pictures, but I can show you and you can decide for yourself if it's a big one.

John H. D. Watson said...

Right, coming.

It's all right, the ones I got in the shower are enough.

Tink said...

As you may have noticed before, I make no bones about it, you two are perfect for each other! You guys are strong on your own and even stronger together. Then with the boys added, it's just superglue added on top.

I'm glad you guys enjoyed the trip to Nicky's (even if it did tire you out)! Even though meeting Greg's mum might not have been as good as you hoped, it didn't go as bad as you feared either! And bonus added getting rid of That Photograph! :D

(Boys, you realise this means you may have to send her a picture [duly authorised by Greg] to replace it... Stealing and defacement of property is a bad thing. Next time ask...)

And yes, this means I came through the hurricane all right! A few branches down but otherwise no real damage done.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Enough to make me very worried whenever Sherlock nicks your phone, yes.

Glad to hear you're okay, Tink.

John H. D. Watson said...

All right, all right. It's possible I deleted them a while ago. It was making me a bit worried too.

kholly said...

Another survivor of the hurricane checking in. Power just came back so that was less than 24 hours. I'll call it a success.

L - I'd say sorry about your day, but it seems like the subsequent out pouring of reassurance by everyone from those you love to us random strangers has already got you back into a good place. I'm glad about that.

Elizabeth said...

I'm sorry it didn't go as hoped, Lestrade. But I'm glad that you've got wonderful people to hug everything a little better.

Psst... Sherlock and Mycroft... Your grand theft photo? Like a boss.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Had a pretty sleepless night. Just couldn't stop thinking about what she said.

I just want to shake her and ask her why she can't see I'm happy. Or if she can, why she can't be happy for me.

Anyway, just makes me appreciate John, the boys, Nicky and her lot and all of you all the more. So thanks.

Sherlock said...

Elizabeth, now I know what Bryan looks like if I ever see him I will kick him, too.

Lestrade's Mummy was silly if she doesn't know Bryan is mean and horrible and John's nice and buys ice cream.

Small Hobbit said...

L - I'm really sorry you slept badly. Over the last few years I've come to realise that comments like those your mother has made reflect rather more on the person who makes the comments than the one receiving them. It sounds as if she can't accept you're happy because it's not the sort of happiness she understands. And maybe she envies you having found something she's never had.

As was said earlier, the best thing to do is walk away. She's your mother, so I know you want to be close, but every time you go back, like a moth to a flame, you'll get burnt and unfortunately there's nothing you can do about it.

We rarely see my in-laws for the same reasons. Mother-in-law has two grandsons who are wonderful accountants, whilst my 23 year old drives coaches. And there was the occasion when she said of my son's fiancée "she doesn't come from the council estate, does she?" - guess where I grew up!

Hope you all enjoy today.

Hugs to you all

Anon Without A Name said...

Lestrade, I'm sorry that she managed to get in your head last night. Maybe you can snooze in the car on the way home? At least it sounds as if you all enjoyed visiting Nicky and her family. It's particularly lovely to see Mycroft and Carla getting on so well.

(And bloody hell, if that's how your Mum is with you, then no wonder that you struggle so much with the self-worth issues. Blimey. Is it wrong of me to want to know what Sherlock said to her?)

Sherlock - I'm not sure it's a good idea to kick mean people, as tempting as it may be. And yes, it sounds like Lestrade's mum is being silly; but sometimes it's hard not to be silly where family are concerned - it's easy to forget that people you've know their whole life grow up and change. And maybe, if she didn't know just how mean Bryan was, and if she's had people like Bryan in her own life, and thought they were nice, and maybe blamed herself when they turned out to be mean and nasty like Bryan did with Lestrade, well, maybe she thinks that's what happened with Lestrade. It's very silly of her if she does, but maybe that's what happened. I think it's very good of you to try to explain to her that she was wrong about that.

Sherlock said...

Lestrade's driving. And he's quiet and he's biting his fingernails and he does that when he thinks and wants to smoke.

And John's being extra happy and trying to cheer him up.

I think Lestrade should be allowed to stay home from work for the rest of the holidays so he can have fun with us and come to the park because that makes him happy. But John says he has to go to work because it's important.

So we're going to bake him brownies when he's at work to be nice to him and make him smile.

Lindsay said...

Sherlock- I think that's an excellent idea. Sometimes trying to make someone you love smile is the best thing you can do for them when they're having a hard time.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Nameless - It is brilliant to see Mycroft and Carla getting along so well. I'd never have guessed they'd strike up such a good friendship. And good Mycroft will have someone else to talk to (via Skype) when he's at school.

And no, she doesn't know what Bryan did. At all. Which is obviously why she still thinks he's 'nice'. I just...I don't want her to know I made the same mistakes she did. It wouldn't help. I think she'll get used to John and the boys. Maybe she's just worried about me moving in with them so soon. I don't know.

Anon Without A Name said...

Sherlock - That's a lovely thing to do; I wish I had someone baking brownies for me when I'm at work.

Lestrade - it's perfectly reasonable that you want to retain some privacy. It's a real shame that your Mum doesn't feel able to take on trust that you know what you're doing, but I'm sure that (unacceptable behaviour notwithstanding) she is concerned for your welfare.

Tl;dr: Families, OMG.

Pere said...

I think if the last option in your poll changed to 'Cheer up, you sweet brave person', we'd all vote on it. :)

You're a brilliant DI and giver-of-bike-rides and person-John-kisses.

hsavinien said...

Sounds like a bit of stressful time. Regarding your poll: Blood doesn't make a family. It can, but it's also the people you find for yourself.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Pere - nearly half of you voted for it anyway! Feel far more like a miserable bastard than anything else right now. But thanks :)

Hsavinien - yeah, I'm very lucky to have John and the boys, as well as Nicky.

Small Hobbit said...

But over half of us have voted for "can't live with, can't live without" - you're really not alone there.

And as Pere said the other half of us would have voted for it because we don't believe you're a miserable bastard whatever you may think.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Thanks. You lot do wonders for a bloke's ego.

Just feeling like I was doing really well, now work's getting its own back and I've barely seen the boys since we got back.

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