13 March 2012

Jam Jar Jimjams...

To the tune of 'We Are The Champions'...
 
I've got my jam,
And some toast too,
Spread the butter on thick,
Cos breakfast time's due,
Kettle is boiling,
Ready for a brew,
Now slather jam on all over,
On the toast and on you

We are the Badgers, my friends,
And we'll keep on blogging 'til the end
We are the Badgers,
We are the Badgers,
No time for trolls,
'Cause we are the Badgers, of the blogs.

I've got jimjams on,
And stand in them tall,
You bought me hugs and love and everything that goes with it,
We thank you all,
There's crumbs in the bed now,
But what do I care?
I've got jamjar jimjams on,
Don't mind if you stare.

We are the Badgers, my friends,
And we'll keep on blogging 'til the end
We are the Badgers,
We are the Badgers,
No time for trolls,
'Cause we are the Badgers, of the blogs.

190 comments:

Anonymous said...

That is the funniest thing I've seen all day :-)

I'm getting funny looks for laughing so hard!!

Anony

lupe said...

OMG you guys... XD

John H. D. Watson said...

Ha! Brilliant.

Calliope said...

Oh My God. *nearly expires from holding in gales of laughter*

Fabulous! *applause* Bravo! You even managed to work in the "jamjar jimjams."

Greg Lestrade said...

Working in JamJar JimJams wasn't as hard as keeping a straight face when typing 'tall' ;)

John H. D. Watson said...

keeping a straight face when typing 'tall' ;)

Lies! He was snickering all the way through.

Greg Lestrade said...

Might write more when I'm on nights...keep me out of trouble.

John H. D. Watson said...

But no accompanying drawings, right?

REReader said...

*mad giggling*

(Not perfectly sure this qualifies as keeping out of trouble.)

Also, I think this deserves John's "Jammy Badgers" tag.

Greg Lestrade said...

Drawings may well appear...

It has its own tag, RR.

John H. D. Watson said...

...As long as they're not of me rocking out with anything out.

Greg Lestrade said...

...I can't be held responsible for anything that may be revealed by your kilt.

Anon Without A Name said...

Brilliant, Lestrade :-)

John - what would be wrong with accompanying drawings?

Rock out with your Brock out

... well, quite.

John H. D. Watson said...

Why would I be wearing a kilt???

REReader said...

(No tags show on the mobile version. I'll check it out later... :))

REReader said...

Why would I be wearing a kilt???

As per Mycroft's YouTube find, the Jammy Badgers band decided to wear kilts. I think.

Greg Lestrade said...

Err..no, this bit of The Jammy Badgers decided that, as Danger had modelled a kilt and bagpipes before (without letting me see, I might add! Because I was hard at work!) then Danger should wear a kilt, and play bagpipes for the band.

Greg Lestrade said...

Nameless - I like my tags to be obscure, yet descriptive :)

Cranky Bookwyrm said...

As always, I'm impressed at the artistic talent of y'all. John needs to give you a pat on the back, or the (im)moral equivalent.

John H. D. Watson said...

I don't recall agreeing to bagpipes or a kilt...

Anonymous said...

It didn't need your agreement John it was just decided ;-)

Anony

Small Hobbit said...

This is amazing Lestallion - you take one of my favourite Queen songs and write awesome words to it and manage to include the jamjar jimjams. And the tag is brilliant :)

Greg Lestrade said...

Anony - exactly. It was decided by popular vote. :)

John H. D. Watson said...

And how do you plan on getting me into said kilt without my cooperation...?

REReader said...

...

(John--you might want to lock up your wardrobe. Just in case.)

Anonymous said...

That I think is a challenge that Greg can rise to ;-)

or he may just go for persuasion I'm sure he could come up with something you want!!

Anony

Greg Lestrade said...

I'd never do anything nasty or violent or force you into a kilt or anything :(

But on the night of The Jammy Badgers' debut gig, the only trousers in this household will be on my legs. And your entire wardrobe will be full of kilts.

I mean, kilt or no kilt, I'd be happy either way... but you might feel a little exposed with nothing at all on, and only your bagpipes to preserve your modesty (as much as bagpipes and modesty can go together)

REReader said...

(...which is just what I thought... :D)

Anonymous said...

'Kilt or no kilt I'd be happy either way'

I knew you'd coem up with something Greg ;-)

Anony

Anon Without A Name said...

John - I don't recall that you exactly agreed to bagpipes and a kilt in Scotland that time - and yet...

Desert Wanderer said...

Lestrade, that is brillaint. Way to set the bar high. :P

John H. D. Watson said...

only your bagpipes to preserve your modesty

...........

...............

I can do nothing but laugh. Which probably means you win.

Desert Wanderer said...

And if Lestrade wins, we all win! Hooray!

Our bouncer is going to be more popular than the members of the band.

Greg Lestrade said...

Hey, he's not a bouncer (for a start, he'd attract people, not repel them!) he's our bagpipeist. bagpiper? Whatever one calls a Dangerous Doc who plays the bagpipes.

John H. D. Watson said...

Everyone seems to be ignoring the fact that I can't actually play the bagpipes...

Greg Lestrade said...

Yep!

None of us ar claiming to be experts at anything. The Jammy Badgers is more a big....well, jamming session :)

Anonymous said...

I'm not sure that your inability to play will stnd out to be honest John we are going to be a very funny set making some very funny sounds I'm sure. I think the kilt is for distraction purposes to be honest ;-)

Anony

Desert Wanderer said...

So? That just makes you the Milli Vanilli of bagpiping!

Plus, you're super cute, so it won't matter. <3 <3 <3

Anon Without A Name said...

John, you'll be a hot man in a kilt, no-one's going to be listening :-)

Greg Lestrade said...

Listen to the lovely people! You just snort when I say these things...

(And don't stand too close to the edge of the stage in your kilt. Front row/mosh pit audience members will see more of your charms than you may want...)

John H. D. Watson said...

I snort when you say I'm 'super cute' because you try to do Carla's voice when you say it.

Greg Lestrade said...

Anony up there was clearly also imitating Carla with those italics. I'm sure Carla frequently manages to speak in italics.

I can call you ADORBS! instead?

Desert Wanderer said...

I was going for teenage valley girl, yes. Hence the three hearts. ;)

REReader said...

I think everyone in the band should play the bagpipes. It would make a wonderful YouTube--you might even go viral!

Anonymous said...

You want us all to play bagpipes RR do we have to all wear kilts to or is that just John?

Anony

REReader said...

(Wearing kilts of course. Unicycles optional.)

Greg Lestrade said...

I'm really sorry, I've been trying every since bagpipes came up not to think this way...but now there is group bagpiping being mentioned.

And I'm sure Urban Dictionary can tell any of you who want to know the sorts of images going through my mind.

I'm sorry. I just can't help but know these things.

Anonymous said...

Glad something is optional!! I'm sure I said yesterday that I couldn't ride a unicycle so thankyou for not making me ;-)

Anony

REReader said...

*not googling*

Anonymous said...

Thanks for that Greg. Yes I know 'if Lestrade says it don't google it' but I've never been one for the rules ;-)

Anony

REReader said...

Not to worry, Anony--people falling off unicycles does not a viral video make. :D

Greg Lestrade said...

Anony - You can Google it. You just need to be prepared to wish you hadn't, I reckon.

I can only blame my knowledge on SoHo, really.

John H. D. Watson said...

...Right. No group bagpiping. New house rule.

Anonymous said...

I just did hence my comment about being naughty and not following the rules ;-)

every day's a school day around you Mr Lestrade!!

Anony

Anonymous said...

seriously I just drowned my computer in milk John!

Anony

Small Hobbit said...

Right, that's one more thing I could have managed to live without knowing.

I think you need a tag that says "just because I mention it you don't need to google it".

REReader said...

Speaking of not being able to not think of something...

The title of this blog does not make my mind go here or even here, but here.

Desert Wanderer said...

Ow, Lestrade. I think you broke my brain. :(

REReader said...

(The second link should have gone here: http://i72.photobucket.com/albums/i196/lashopaholic/bigstockphoto_Together_1892559.jpg

I don't know why it didn't.)

Greg Lestrade said...

SH, DW, people said they liked my blog being an education... I can only teach what I know!

John H. D. Watson said...

At least it's not glass jars in inappropriate places.

REReader said...

Ha!

Alas, that is not where my mind goes. *shakes head at self*

Anonymous said...

How can one person know as many of these things as you do Greg ;-)

It's no wonder you get headaches a brain big enough to contain all the weird things it does must be running out of space inside your skull!!

Anony

Greg Lestrade said...

Quite!

Cmon, I'll let you take me to bed and show me your sporran.

Greg Lestrade said...

That was meant to address John.

Not that I don't think your sporran is lovely too, I'm sure.

John H. D. Watson said...

Promise me that's the first time you've used that line...

Greg Lestrade said...

I have asked a man in a kilt to show me what was in his sporran before...

Sadly he didn't really partake in innuendo.

(mobile phone, wallet and house keys, for those of you who want to know)

John H. D. Watson said...

Ha! Perfect.

REReader said...

Sweet dreams, laddies. :)

H. Savinien said...

*sniggers* Well started on the lyrics, Lestrade!

And, while I do not at all condone the forcing of people into clothes with which they are not okay, I do have a pattern for sewing a kilt. Just throwing that out there.

CzechReader said...

Now this is a way to start the morning! I spend yesterday writing and come back to this (and RR's matching hair and kilts)... :-D

Awesome!

Anon Without A Name said...

I asked a bloke to show me his sporran once. A disappointing experience. Even though it was a New Year's eve, it wasn't that bloody cold.

...Right. No group bagpiping. New house rule.

Nicely specific house rule, John :-)

CzechReader said...

Okay, guys, I think we need to cover this armadillo song. With bagpipes.

Small Hobbit said...

I think that should be the bonus track for our album.

AftSO said...

That song is totally making my morning. (Was up until 2, up at 7:30. Less rest, _definitely_ more wicked, maybe I'll sleep more tonight?)

Maz said...

OMG I didn't check to see if you'd posted last night so now there is coffee dribbling down my chin and um, perhaps my dress neckline isn't quite high enough to catch it before, well. Anyway. I need to go clean up.

Should we start listing House Rules? House Rule 1: John is always innocent. House Rule 2: Lestrade is never innocent. House Rule 3: No group bagpiping allowed. House Rule 4: ?

(Captcha says "sinned." Well, duh. :D )

Greg Lestrade said...

4.? I think number 1 should be that its all John's fault!

But I assume someone will soon suggest that if I say it, it shouldn't be Googled... That could be 5.

Anonymous said...

Where would we dare to pin the list if we wrote it down Maz? ;-)

Do you not think we should abolish the no google rule Greg? no one ever follows it and we all just end up getting sent to the naughty porch ;-)

Anony

Greg Lestrade said...

RR follows it, frequently!

The rest of you are just gluttons for punishment. :)

Maz said...

Well, it doesn't say "can't" be Googled, anony, just "shouldn't" which yeah, I take that as a given! :D

Anonymous said...

There is nothing like telling people they shouldn't do something for making them want to do it especially if they have never matured past about 15 ;-)

I like to take every opportunity for education Greg whether I like what I find out or not!

Anony

Maz said...

Also - yeah, where WOULD we pin such a list? I have no idea! And I bet it would get longer every day, the way conversations run here!

Greg Lestrade said...

It shouldn't be a rule. People should just be prepared to wish they hadnt googled it.

REReader said...

RR follows it, frequently!

I do, having learned through experience.... O_O

I think all these "rules" lack a certain rule-ness. I mean, at least three of them don't involve anyone doing or not-doing anything! (I'd say they were house rules-of-thumb, but I just know someone is going to find that hysterically funny in a way I and Sherlock will need to have explained, so I shall refrain. *sigh*)

REReader said...

Maz, I think we would need Mrs T to make a book for us, like the one she has for Sherlock. :)

Desert Wanderer said...

Just cyange the rule to "If Lestrade said it, and you Google it, don't blame Lestrade" ? Or, "Google at your own risk"?

Small Hobbit said...

I thought one of the rules was "Lestrade is always to blame"?

Anon Without A Name said...

I thought "it's always John's fault"?

Isn't one of the house rules "no time machines"?

Greg Lestrade said...

That may be a rule over the road on the other blog, but here it's quite the opposite :)

John H. D. Watson said...

Depends which house you're talking about. If it's our flat, then definitely no time machines.

John H. D. Watson said...

Oh, and rule #1 I'm pretty sure should be...never google camel spiders.

Anonymous said...

I'm with you on the camel spiders John!!

What about. no one is to blame for anything, especially Greg and John ;-)

I don't like the time machine rule :-( some days a time machine would be the most useful thing.

Anony

REReader said...

All time machines need to be built OUTSIDE the flat! You never know what might get sucked into a time warp inside. (Not that you know what might get sucked into a time warp outside, but it's less likely to be something you want to use in this part of time.) :)

Greg Lestrade said...

There are worse things I can think to Google. But I'm not putting them on here, because I really wouldn't want any of you seeing them! (and if you really wanted to, you'll find a way anyway).

I think the rule was 'no time machines in the living room', wasn't it?

RR - I think it would be stolen within about 30 seconds of being outside.

John H. D. Watson said...

Oh no, I'm sure I specified the entire flat. Otherwise Mycroft could just build it in his room, and I'm not having that.

Greg Lestrade said...

My mistake. So you did.

Mycroft, the flat downstairs that security have is fine, though. Or Mrs Hudson's, if she doesn't mind.

Anonymous said...

Unless you somehow got a new job as everyones dad Greg you are in no way responsible for what we chose to google whatever you might write on your own blog ;-)

Is tomorrow your day off? you got much planned for the morning before your ride with John?

Anony

REReader said...

I think it would be stolen within about 30 seconds of being outside.

You'd think, but that only works for stuff you want stolen. (Of course, I suspect John would, in fact, want a time machine stolen, in which case...)

Greg Lestrade said...

RR - I can assure you, anything not tied down gets stolen. And most stuff that is tied down. Or bolted. Especially if it's made of metal.

Anony - I HAVE to run tomorrow morning, because my 'run lots' plan is...well, doing pretty badly so far. Not sure where I'll go yet though.

REReader said...

L, if only we could count on that, the NYC subways would not need that "If you see something, say something" motto they have plastered all over the place--all bombs would be carried off as soon as they were put down! (Now, anything left in a locked lobby as decoration--very obviously fake plants, ugly posters on the walls, hideous industrial seating--all that disappears overnight.)

Anonymous said...

Thats a bit like I HAVE to swim tomorrow I guess but atleast I know where I'm going, 25 metres one way 25 metres the other way ;-)

Exercise is a great way to clear out the cobwebs, hope you enjoy wherever you go :-)

Anony

Greg Lestrade said...

Do people actually say anything?

We have the same sort of thing here, given the constant threat of terrorism, but despite the tube having been targeted a number of times, no one ever does say anything. There was a little upturn in people reporting bags after the most recent bombings, but now it's back to normal.

Street level though, everything goes.

REReader said...

I've reported shopping bags left on platforms to toll booth personnel a few times. They just looked confused, though--I don't think they even called it in.

Small Hobbit said...

My son once had a bag left on his bus. When he carefully opened it was just a schoolkids forgotten PE kit.

Greg Lestrade said...

To be honest, 7/7 showed that abandoned bags aren't the only risk - not like in the old IRA days.

REReader said...

Yeah. I've got off trains a few times because someone was making me nervous that way--but they don't want you to report that. (And that's as someone who's been riding subways my entire life--it takes someone being VERY strange for me to even notice, much less react to.)

Anonymous said...

There was a bomb scare at a school I know of, the police were busy somewhere and advised that the teachers look round the school and see if they could see a bomb! I'm not sure what a bomb would look like in a building full of bags and coats!!

I think we are all guilty of staying away from suspicious things and hoping for the best possibly because that is easier than thinking the threat might actually be real, but it's not really a good thing, or the responsible thing to do.

Anony

Greg Lestrade said...

I've never felt nervous on the tube. Despite spending half my time as a PC evacuating various bits of London, and being on one of the teams investigating after the bombings.

I'm fairly certain anyone that intent on action wouldn't be drawing attention to themself.

Desert Wanderer said...

So, the first time I went on a train to King's Cross, I was eating an apple, but couldn't find a bin to throw it away in. So, I wandered the platforms for a bit, looking around and ended up lost in some far-off part of the station. One of the transit cops (?) told me "Oh, just set it down anywhere. We don't have bins after the bombings."

It was so awkward because I was terrified that it was a trap and I'd get arrested, and I didn't even really properly speak the language yet, and I'd seen that one cop tackle a dude only a month previous. I'm sure I looked ridiculous, standing there, trying not to look conspicuously non-British with my apple core and to gather the courage to nonchalantly drop it on the ground or the tracks or something.

Took me much longer than it should have to think to find the guys who were collecting trash and drop it in one of their bags...

Greg Lestrade said...

Hah, yeah. Some people get really nervous when thay say 'Where are the bins?' and get the answer 'We don't have any, because people put bombs in them'. But once you've explained it a few hundred times, you can't be bothered to dress it up!

If you chuck stuff on the tracks, the rats and mice deal with it fairly quickly :)

And it could have been a regular Met officer, but more likely BTP - British Transport Police.

REReader said...

I'm fairly certain anyone that intent on action wouldn't be drawing attention to themself.

Yes, absolutely. It wasn't that sort of thing at all. More...they way they were checking their bags.

Greg Lestrade said...

In a similar-yet different vein, you can all have a Lestrade Public Service Announcement.

If you see a sign that says 'Beware, pickpockets operate in this area' (or similar), what do you do?

90% of people immediately put their hand to the pocket containing their wallet and/or phone - or whatever the most valuable thing they have is.

Pickpockets stand by these signs, clock you, and then know which pocket to go for.

Don't do it :)

Anonymous said...

My hand always starts to move when I read a sign like that but I normally manage to stop myself in time. It's amazing how well criminals can use crime prevention strategies against us isn't it!!

Anony

REReader said...

Ha! Makes perfect sense. :)

(What I do is sneer. At least in winter, I keep my wallet inside my coat--they make these nice, small, flat wallets with shoulder straps, like this one.)

Greg Lestrade said...

Anony - I don't think we should have signs like it. If you don't know pickpockets work the Underground, you probably shouldn't be out without an adult :)

Anonymous said...

That is very true :-) I know you are probably sure who put's them up but it has crossed my mind sometimes whether the criminals put them up themselves ;-)

Anony

Anon Without A Name said...

I remember being surprised last year to notice that the local train station now has bins - well, transparent bin bags suspended from hoops. First time I'd seen a bin in a train station in decades.

Oddly, I've never felt nervous on the tube.

Greg Lestrade said...

Yup, bins are making a come back, owing to 'the changing nature of the threat'.

I like the tube, despite having seen enough bodies down there to last more than a lifetime. I like the sounds and the smells.

And should go to bed to finish celebrating the 14th :)

John H. D. Watson said...

The steak was delicious, by the way, in case anyone was wondering.

Desert Wanderer said...

Yes, because the steak is exactly where our minds went...

Greg Lestrade said...

Dessert will be equally delightful, I'm sure...

Anonymous said...

I've only been interested in the steak DW so I'm glad you enjoyed it as much as Greg did John.

I hope you both enjoy dessert more though ;-)

Anony

John H. D. Watson said...

L - I have no doubt. :)

KHolly said...

I like the sounds and the smells.
Ugh, the smells are what I hate most about the metro.

I recently watch a guy enter the crowded train and set down the box he was carrying on a seat and then take a step or two away making it look like it wasn't his. I definitely decided that if he got off without it I would be exiting as well and finding someone to tell. But he took it when he left; just some heavy stuff he was bringing home from the office I suppose. Funny what occurs to you though. He didn't "look suspicious" he looked like a middle aged office worker, but that doesn't mean anything.

I work for an urban university and several times this year we've gotten email blasts from campus police about suspicious persons with guns being seen on or near campus and when they describe the ones with guns 80% of the time it's middle aged office worker. I am convinced the city is teeming with spies.

REReader said...

KHolly, I don't know about spies, but suspicious persons with guns near a university is nothing to ignore. Just one year after I graduated college, my university was targeted multiple times by a sniper--several students were shot, and one woman driving past was killed. I knew a couple of the students that were shot, in fact, as I had worked in the dorm office there for several years on work-study. (They never caught the sniper, by the way, just put it down to anti-Semitism.)

starbright said...

Speaking of things left on the subway...

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/tor/149525172.html

Desert Wanderer said...

Oh. Oh, dear. *imagines hundreds of crickets on a subway*

I can't breathe I'm laughing so hard. The people! Those poor crickets must be so confused...

(Hi, are you new, starbright? :) )

starbright said...

Heheh. It's the "unless you are angry and covered in crickets" that kills me.

Not new, just kinda quiet. :)

KHolly said...

RR: they take it very seriously, hence the email blasts. It's never turned out to be targeting us though, just near us. And I'm joking about the spies of course, but only sort of considering the number of people I've met who deftly dodge questions of where they work.

REReader said...

KHolly--It's something that only happens elsewhere. Until it isn't.

(Might be people who don't have jobs anymore.)

Desert Wanderer said...

Not new, just kinda quiet. :)

Awww. Now I feel bad for not remembering. :(

Hi, anyway. How've you been?

starbright said...

Don't feel bad - when I say quiet, I mean like...three comments ever lol. I would've been quite easy to miss. :)

Piplover said...

The first time I went on the tube with my sister, she told me to just drop my cup anywhere. I didn't believe her at first, until I saw other people do it.

Then it was my turn to explain to my family to just drop their stuff. It felt very weird.

Anonymous said...

Starbright - Welcome to our merry band of... um, well, commenters is probably the most neutral way to put it. ;) The craiglist link gave me a much needed laugh.

All - Days 2 and 3 of the new job have gone very well. In the mornings, I untangle paperwork and put stamps on products. In the afternoons, I'm frantically logging +12 years worth of broken merchandise into an Excel WS. We are now up to +700 rows, and I foresee that we may exceed +2000 entries by the time we're done. (I wish I was exaggerating. The team I'm working with is buried in a large, double-door cabinet of paper...)

Greg - (re: rubbish bins) That explains so much. I spent a good 20 minutes wandering around the Houses of Parliament, looking for a place to throw my apple core away and wondering how London could possibly not have bins and not have absolute chaos come the Summer Games. ... They're probably back because of the Summer Games.

~A from NW

Cranky Bookwyrm said...

AfNW, Yay for your job going well! And O_O for all that paper.

I'm still trying to come up with a response for the missing rubbish bins.

Desert Wanderer said...

Hooray, AfNW! Sounds very, very busy though. Are your coworkers nice?

Greg Lestrade said...

A - they've been coming back for years - clear bags, hanging, no bins you can't see into. And they're definitely not coming back for the games - wouldnt be surprised if they went altogether again before then, there is such a high terrorist threat.

I'm really glad your job is going well!

Anonymous said...

AfNW I'm so glad the job is going so well :-) hope your colleagues are lovely and that you continue to enjoy the job :-)

Greg what are you doing up at this time on your day off? You're supposed to be relaxing and storing up sleep ready for weekend aren't you? Hope you have a great run and an even better ride ;-)

Anony

Greg Lestrade said...

Anony - Sherlock doesn't allow for lie ins. Was up making him scrambled eggs on toast.

Going for a run once John's at work and Shortstuff is at school. But it's really misty out. Hope I don't get lost...

Anonymous said...

Ah the small person problem I see ;-)

Try not to get lost, I'm sure we could form quite a search party to come and find you though ;-)

Anony

Desert Wanderer said...

Fresh out of breadcrums, Lestrade? You could make mini pancakes and drop them behind you...

Small Hobbit said...

DW - and how long do you suppose mini pancakes/breadcrumbs would last with the all the pigeons around?

Well, I'm off to London for a couple of days, so you lot be good. Or, probably more appropriately, "if you can't be good, be careful".

Desert Wanderer said...

Ah, there you reach.the second part of my plan. Have Sherlock with a map, riding a Dog o War, follow the pancakes. Et voila, instant map. Plus, I bet sherlocks really good at directions. And Lestrade can get home from harrods, I'm sure.

Greg Lestrade said...

If I lose my way I shall ask a friendly policeman.

Might try 8 miles today... (might not make it)

Desert Wanderer said...

Try the sere-haired ones. I've heard they're the nicest kind.

Might try 8 miles today... (might not make it)

And I was so excited I did 3.5 last night. You're bad for my running morale. :P

REReader said...

I'm pretty sure I could never bring myself to just drop garbage on platforms--and I know I could never drop it on tracks, NY has had far too much trouble with track fires caused by garbage! I'd do what I do in a car--wrap it in a tissue and bring it home to throw out.

Have a good run, L!

Anonymous said...

8 miles!!

You put the rest of us to shame Greg! Enjoy the fresh air :-)

Anony

Greg Lestrade said...

RR - is only say it was okay to chuck things like Apple cores on the track, never litter. And yes, it is encouraged to take litter home with you.

Don't think we have track fires. Probably because of the way the tube works.

And after all your kind words, I font manage 8. Between 6 and 7 and I felt like I might die. So walked the rest.

Anonymous said...

well what a let down ;-)

We'd all rather you walked a bit than you collapsed somewhere hidden in the mist :-)

Anony

AftSO said...

Good morning! Scrambled eggs on toast sounds great L, what a nice idea! *goes off to make some*

Greg Lestrade said...

Scrambled eggs was the result of very hard bargaining on both sides. We started with eggs Benedict vs. Toast. This seemed a reasonable middle ground, in the end.

REReader said...

L--Yes, you said apple cores, because the rats would eat them. *shivers* I see more than enough rats on subway platforms and tracks already, so I remembered that! But cups were mentioned, so that's what I was thinking of. (And of course, we still have garbage cans all over the place here, often overflowing and equally often ignored. And dangerous electrical rails that set trash on fire, and sometimes electrocute people who jump down onto those tracks for dropped cell phones or keys.)

Scrambled eggs and toast sounds like a fair compromise--more than fair, actually. :)

Running 6+ and walking the rest sounds like a decent compromise (with your body) too.

I hope you and John have a fun ride!

Mazarin said...

You're doing better than most, though! I couldn't manage one, I don't think. No, I know I couldn't. Don't know I could even walk that far unless absolutely necessary. (That is so sad now that I've written it out like that. *determines to use ellipital trainer more*)

John - glad to hear your...er, steak, etc. was good last night. We sort of half-celebrated - we had chicken. ;)

Greg Lestrade said...

I think all underground systems run on a live third rail. Or at least, I can't think of another way they could run. Some people die every year from electrocution on the tube, but most are hit by trains. I've never heard of fires here caused by the live rails, but then I wouldn't have reason to. Most famous fire here was caused by a cigarette end, so that's not an issue any more.

I think the way the trains push the air around the tube system the rubbish all get blown around and out of the tunnels, i imagine there are teams who collect it or something.

You've got to be pretty stupid to jump onto the tracks for anything, really.

John H. D. Watson said...

Tube fluffers: http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2009/01/down-in-tube-station-after-midnight.html

Greg Lestrade said...

I knew the fluffers cleaned for...well, fluff! I suppose they must do litter too.

Speaking of fluffers...it was entirely Johns fault I didn't run all 8 miles. He wore me out, with all that steak cooking yesterday.

John H. D. Watson said...

It is not my fault! It's just the way you are - you put so much of yourself into everything you do. An admirable trait.

REReader said...

That's a very interesting story, John! I know there's no such job on the NY subways because the trains run 24/7--the electricity to the rails is only off during blackouts and a very, very few other emergencies. (I vaguely remember hearing that when the system was shut down for the-hurricane-that-wasn't, it was the first time that was ever done, but I couldn't swear to it.)

L--Anyone who jumps onto the tracks for any reason other than to save a life IS an idiot. But as they say, God must love idiots, he made such a lot of them. :)

Greg Lestrade said...

Danger - I'd agree that I put a large part of myself into everything I do. But that would sound like bragging...

REReader said...

(Footnote: obviously they do turn off electricity to sections of track for repair work--but not the whole system, and not as part of a regular schedule.)

Anonymous said...

How is bashful winning the poll Greg? ;-)

Anony

Greg Lestrade said...

You'd think it made more sense to close sections for a cleaning schedule than at random when stuff caught fire...

REReader said...

Ha. Anony--good question! ;)

L--They do clean the tracks, more now than they used to, but not by hand, I don't think, and DEFINITELY not by shutting down the tracks. Trains gotta run!

Greg Lestrade said...

Doesn't it have a lot of tracks side by side quite often, though? So they could shut one, but run trains next to the closed one? I mean, they must do something to clean it/work on it if the trains still run. I remember some places it felt like you could see 5 or 6 lines.

REReader said...

No more than 4 in any one place, that I know of (not counting different levels)--one local and one express in either direction. (If there are different trains on different levels, they go different places, or along different avenues, except for those convergences.) so on weekends they can shut down some sections of the express lines and they do--but they can't shut down the local tracks without making the local stops inaccessible.

Normally, workers clean and repair while the trains are running-- they have to be trained how to deal with the live rails, and stop every 10 or 15 minutes for trains to go by. And just this January they experimented with shutting down ONE LINE for four days to do all cleaning and repair at once, and you should have heard the shrieking--in fact, I'm surprised you didn't! (They plan to do it again for other lines, but not regularly, and it is wildly unpopular. And in fairness, in parts of the city there simply are no other public transportation options, and how are people supposed to get to work?)

Greg Lestrade said...

Ah. That can't happen here because trains run ever 1-3 minutes, and the tunnels are only a few inches bigger than the trains. You couldn't get out of the way.

They run bus services that call at all stations when a line is closed. People hate it, but what can you do?
It is bad, given how expensive the tube can be, that the service isn't better.

John H. D. Watson said...

But that would sound like bragging...

That's why I said it for you. ;)

Greg Lestrade said...

You're too good to me :)

I think I was quite calm with you driving earlier... you enjoy it?

John H. D. Watson said...

Yeah, I did! It was great, really nice. Glad to hear it was a bit easier for you too. You can drive next time, promise.

Greg Lestrade said...

My mind was thinking about those large parts of me that I put into things. Distracting, having you AND the stripe between my thighs...

Anony - I have Jo idea! I voted grumpy.

Greg Lestrade said...

Striple. Not stripe.

John H. D. Watson said...

Fortunately, my mind was, of course, solely focused on the traffic.

Anonymous said...

Never grumpy Mr and even less bashful ;-) I'm sticking with happy whatever the poll result is!

Anony

REReader said...

Striple?

Greg Lestrade said...

The bike.

dw said...

Lestallion's motorstallion

REReader said...

Ah. Thank you both. :)

Greg Lestrade said...

I really want to know what else you thought I had between my legs now...

REReader said...

If I'd had a thought, would I have needed to ask? *innocent face*

Ria said...

I'm not sure I believe your innocent act anymore, RR. I think you're secretly smuttier than the rest of us put together :D

In other news, I just bought a book that I thought you all might enjoy. It's called "You Can Stick It" and it's full of stickers that look like they might realistically belong on various things, like books or cash machines or elevators, but they actually say wonderfully snarky things. For instance, for books, "He dies at the end," "makes the film of the book look good"; or for lifts, "Fitted with anti-death plunge mechanism," "Escape hatch locked for security purposes"; and cash machines, "Speak your PIN clearly into the microphone," "All banknotes printed on the premises," among other things. I have grand plans.

Greg Lestrade said...

RR - someone like DW would have had lots of ideas, and been wanting to know which one it was.

Ria - they sound brilliant!

REReader said...

In this case I decided to defer all ideas. :)

Ria--Where did you find that? Awesome!

DesertWanderer said...

" someone like DW would have had lots of ideas,"

Oh really? Such as? I'm sure I have no idea what you mean...

Greg Lestrade said...

I couldn't begin to imagine, DW. You just seem the type for ideas.

Although not so much the type for innocence...

Desert Wanderer said...

I am just as innocent as you are, Lestrade. :)

REReader said...

Would that make me as innocent as the Doc, DW? :)

Greg Lestrade said...

That, DW, I can believe.

Anonymous said...

I'm not sure there are any innocent people around here! Some just hide their thoughts better than others ;-)

Anony

REReader said...

Whatever y'all like. *bats eyelashes*

Anonymous said...

Daily report: We've past +1040 entries and the rest are in sorted piles with labels. \O/ Now all we have to do is figure out what to do with the unlabelled items. Um...

My boss is fantastic and my coworkers are friendly. They're all very patient with me as I learn on the job. The honeymoon period isn't over yet, but I can see myself at this company for the next two or three years.

Greg - I hope your night shifts are boring, yet fruitful. =)

~A from NW

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