2 December 2013

Oblivious to all of us, The child that grows inside

If anyone's missing any tinsel, we've got it. Yeah, and the entire tinsel supply for every shop in the UK. And abroad.

John caught me having a sniff earlier. There's tinsel that smells, and tinsel that doesn't...obviously the stuff that does is best! (We have some of each.)

I have spent this afternoon teaching Sherlock to plait with tinsel. Nicky, all those hours plaiting your hair for school weren't wasted!

I think it has something to do with our wreath-to-be for our door. But who knows. Maybe we just need to be combining three into one or we'll never use it all.


I am removing John from these mean streets next weekend. Bit of a bike ride, some champagne, some relaxing, some...never you mind, and, eventually, sadly, I'll have to bring him back to finally ramp up to Christmas!

I'm always beset by worries that places won't be good enough. But with John, I'm...well, just the fact we're there together is what matters. Which still amazes me. I mean, that...anything can feel like that. Taken me a long time to realise that I've always judged myself very harshly because I wanted to get there first, before someone else did. Didn't...well, I didn't even know people like him existed, or I'd've tried to find one sooner ;)


Mycroft has asked if I'd like to escape the Christmas chaos at some point and go floating again. We've both been given half price floats, so...I probably will. They say it's more relaxing the second time, so, well, we'll see. I'd probably pay double to lock myself in a room alone by the end of Christmas, so half price is definitely a bargain!


Nights were...well, nights. First one was fairly boring. Following someone around. We learnt things about him. But...well, not as useful as it could have been. We'll see. It's given us things to think about.

Last night started with paperwork, ended with a dead body. (Not because of the paperwork.)


Received a text from Sal earlier. "See on the news your love-child hasn't fallen far from the tree." This is because they have this crazy idea in the office that Tom Daley looks like me, and is my love child (I must have missed the act that led to that). Anyway, he's far better looking than I am!


John bought me a lovely shirt today. Not for work, just casual. Makes me look almost presentable.

79 comments:

pandabob said...

A bit of time away for you and John sounds like a great idea :-) It's lovely to see how well you fit together and how you work at making each other feel special. :-)

I thought of you when I saw the Tom Daley thing ;-) its great to see the internet giving people the chance to say what they want to without the media getting in the way!

Greg Lestrade said...

It is good that he can use his own words. But sad that he felt he had to, before the press got their claws in.

John H. D. Watson said...

Wherever we go will be wonderful. :)

He does look a bit like you...

You didn't need to smell the tinsel, surely our whole flat smells of tinsel at this point!

pandabob said...

That's true. The day that it really just doesn't matter is the day I look forward to :-)

REReader said...

You can't have too much sparkle!

Nor too many gifts "just because." :)

Greg Lestrade said...

Danger - only some tinsel smells! Whole flat will no doubt soon smell of tree and tinsel and things slowly burning... ;)

AnonyBob - at least he's had lots of support, unlike years ago, when the papers would have hung drawn and quartered him, and he wouldn't even have seen the support if it was there at all.

Sherlock said...

John said we could cut a HUGE wreath out of cardboard and then stick things onto it I want to do that.

John H. D. Watson said...

I'm afraid I did say that.

Greg Lestrade said...

Hah, well, the door is only so big...

John H. D. Watson said...

True. At least that's some limitation.

Greg Lestrade said...

And when the door is open, we do still need to get through it.

Plus it can't hang down too low, or the dogs will eat it.

REReader said...

You can put a LOT of things on a door-width-sized wreath!

Greg Lestrade said...

I have no doubt our wreath will be...very festive, and welcoming.

Or, you know, bizarre and slightly terrifying.

One or the other.

John H. D. Watson said...

All of the above.

I said we could make one for his mum as well...

Greg Lestrade said...

You are one sharp doc - he gets all the fun, we get rid of some of the tinsel mountain!

And it's only right and proper that Mrs H's wreath is slightly terrifying. She wouldn't want to be bothered by carol singers or other undesirables.

John H. D. Watson said...

She probably has people for that, but the wreath can't hurt. Much.

Small Hobbit said...

We had a cardboard wreath, wrapped in tinsel, with decorations attached, that my daughter made. We hung it on our front door for years.

Greg Lestrade said...

On the contrary, I imagine Sherlock could manufacture a lethal wreath!! ;)

Greg Lestrade said...

If you're all being quiet because you're stuck on what to buy me for Christmas, don't be! Like I said, bag of nuts and a satsuma and I'm happy ;)

John H. D. Watson said...

Marmite nuts?

rsf said...

I am now imagining a cardboard wreath of such magnificence that you have to step through it to get through the doorway.

What does tinsel smell like? I mean, when it smells. Because I've missed out on that phenomenon.

REReader said...

Perhaps a jumper with little light bulbs? ;D

Good question, rsf! My acquaintance with tinsel has been at a distance. (However, I do know the scent of an oil light burning out!)

Greg Lestrade said...

Marmite nuts and I'm ecstatic! Although there's a certain pleasure from nuts requiring nutcrackers...

Danger, I am off Friday, sat, sun and Mon. I think Sherlock's school Christmas Fayre is Sat isn't it?

John H. D. Watson said...

It is. Mrs N was just asking about you and your guitar...

Greg Lestrade said...

Did you tell her we're very happy together, thanks?

John H. D. Watson said...

Ha. More or less.

Kestrel337 said...

I seem to remember tinsel smelling like hot metal, dust, and that humid ozone smell that comes right before a summer storm. The smell always reminded me of hanging out in my dad's workshop with the windows open. I've not heard of scented tinsel. Sounds kind of nice, though.

Greg Lestrade said...

Dare I ask why she was actually asking?

John H. D. Watson said...

I'm not completely clear on that. Caroling was mentioned, but I don't think she meant to send you out with a troop of small children, wandering and strumming your lute, I mean guitar. Probably. Anyway, she said she'd email you.

Greg Lestrade said...

Right. Carols. I do only know rude or silly versions...

You okay? Still covered in tinsel? Made a wreath the size of the M25?

John H. D. Watson said...

The wreath is...growing. It may be alive by dinner time.

Greg Lestrade said...

night of the living killer wreath? It's not a were-wreath is it?

Need anything? Apart from an escape plan and some shears?

Small Hobbit said...

It's been so quiet this evening I'm starting to worry that the wreath has consumed everything in its path and parts of the 'net.

Greg Lestrade said...

the wreath isn't done yet, but has had a trial fit on the door. It...just about fits. The degus have helped by chewing one edge of the card. Still, all the family should be part of it, right?

Greg Lestrade said...

Ha! SH - it almost has ;)

But now the Great Creator of All Things must go to bed. Wreath manufacture will start anew tomorrow. He said he's going to make more bits in art club tomorrow night, unless they're doing a Christmas project anyway.

Greg Lestrade said...

John fell asleep during the news.

I may have slightly decorated him with tinsel and baubles.

I don't know if I should stay here and wait for him to wake up, so I get to see his face, or run away. Far away.

REReader said...

Have you got glare-proof goggles handy? ;D

John H. D. Watson said...

why is there a red bauble hanging from my ear

Greg Lestrade said...

bauble? Huh? No idea what you're talking about.

John H. D. Watson said...

and the sheer amount of tinsel in my hair...

Greg Lestrade said...

I kept putting it on. You kept not waking up...

John H. D. Watson said...

But I'm awake now and you're not holding still to let me return the favour...

Greg Lestrade said...

Well...that's life.

I'm clearly not as easily adornable as you. Or adorable.

John H. D. Watson said...

Ha. I like this new definition of life.

I'll just have to be sneakier.

Greg Lestrade said...

When I wake up in the morning I do not want to have to call the fire brigade to be cut free from an entire tinsel cocoon...

John H. D. Watson said...

I'll keep it above the eyebrows :)

Greg Lestrade said...

well, try not to obscure my halo with it then ;)

I really must go to bed. With all my Were-Florists senses tingling for the tinsel attack...

John H. D. Watson said...

Is it your turn or mine to write more? I forgot again.

Bed would be good, yes.

Greg Lestrade said...

errr....mine? I think? Becuase you were all clever with flowers and things in the last chapter.

John H. D. Watson said...

Oh good, all right.

Olli said...

I figured that Tom would be the perfect age to be your love child, but then again, he's a hearty 19 years old, so possibly not.

I finally got around to watching his YouTube video. Imagine coming out--via Internet?!?--before you hit twenty. Some of us are twice that age and haven't managed to get entirely out of the closet. My heart just swells for that boy--don't know if it's out of pride, or some sort of protectiveness, or just a sense of the world having changed.

Anyway, I don't follow sports and didn't know his name last month. Now I am overcome with the desire to beat up anyone who looks at that kid funny. Ah, Internet, how you change us.

Joolz said...

Good morning all. How many decorations had to be removed before you could both get out of bed today. ;)

Have fun finishing your monster wreath later Sherlock.

Have a great day guys. :)

Greg Lestrade said...

I escaped bed with only the baubles I have naturally. My bike helmet was stuffed with tinsel though, and my boots, and my gloves had big bows attached and there was a robin sitting on my jacket...

Anonymous said...

I have a mental image of you putting on your helmet while it was still full of tinsel. It making me smile even though I'm sure you took the tinsel out like a sensible person.

Also, I found this article in The Economist. Posting because it seems to be marginally more well-thought-out than most "2 Nations Divided By a Common Language" lists out there.
http://www.economist.com/blogs/johnson/2011/05/euphemistically_speaking

Hope you guys are having a good day.

Ella

REReader said...

The tinsel was clearly meant for socks and a scarf--I'm sure you looked very festive! ;D

Ella, that list is terrifyingly confusing! Those on the UK sude--Is it all (or even mostly) accurate from the British side? Because the "what is understood" side certainly is!

Kestrel337 said...

RR, I suspect living where I do is why I didn't find the list confusing at all. If 'benign passive aggression' can be considered a thing, it's a thing in Minnesota.

REReader said...

Heh. And in New York, "passive aggression" means no one hit you!

Greg Lestrade said...

Pretty accurate.

In the police 'with respect' definitely means 'you're being such a dick I'm forced to adress it, not ignore it like I usually do.'

Unknown said...

um, yeah, what Olli said. Looking forward to the day when someone's private life is actually not anybody else's business.
Ella, thanks for the link to the article, that was great! I think I might be starting a file for British-American translation, I seem to collect these... this one seems particularly useful!
It also reminds me of something Garrison Keillor said on Prairie Home Companion many years ago, he was doing something like that, only on speaking Minnesotan. There were several expressions, but the one I remember was "That's different." meaning: how utterly bizarre and weird! Kestrel, you may have more of those... :)
S

Olli said...

Ella, thanks for the link! I'm American and from a town known for its plain speaking (or, possibly, its lack of tact). Some of the phrases in the article made me chortle and I could imagine the tone of understatement that would lead one to the actual meaning ("QUITE good"/"quite GOOD"). Others just seemed to defy logic.

This is casting every recent conversation I've had with my British sister-in-law in a different light. Of course, she's been on US soil for years, so by the time I have come around to her actual meanings, she'll probably have become resigned to hitting me over the head with what she wants me to know.

John H. D. Watson said...

What the British say: "Perhaps you would like to think about...."/"I would suggest..." /"It would be nice if..."

I have heard people call in air support with the phrase 'It would be lovely if you could join us...'

Greg Lestrade said...

We're just a polite country. Extra polite when being incredibly insulting. Or extra understated.

That's why when we arrest people we tend to say things like 'would you mind coming with us down the station?' Meaning 'you're nicked, maybe never see the light of day again'.

Anonymous said...

(facepalm) As an outsider: are you certain that you're not speaking this way just to make us paranoid? Or, "It would be lovely if you could tell us more about that."

-Olli (who can't manage more than one Gmail account)

Anonymous said...

It's 7 degrees here. Which in Celsius converts to "really bloody cold." Or, if I was talking about this to a Brit, "a tad bit nippy"?

Ella

Greg Lestrade said...

Yeah, bit nippy. John would probably say it's brass monkeys. I'd say it was taters.

People in Newcastle may consider putting on a shirt over their t shirt. ;)

rsf said...

I wonder if a lot of folks from Newcastle settled in Maine. Because 7 degrees F is about when a friend of mine from Portland begins to consider finding her winter hat.

Anon Without A Name said...

Extra polite when being incredibly insulting.

When I'm sending an email, "I'm disappointed to note that..." = "OMFG I can't believe you ignored every rule, everything we've ever talked about and done that. I'm absolutely furious and am considering taking formal action." :-)

Greg Lestrade said...

Nameless - "No, no, it's a lovely...colour on you!" means "You PAID for that outfit? Actual money? No one forced you to put it on with a gun to your head?"

(I'm lucky I'm not going out with a woman, right?) (Now feel free to tell me you feel my comment could be construed as insulting to women, by some people ;) )

John H. D. Watson said...

Ha. You never say that about my Christmas jumpers though... It goes more like 'My eyes, my eyes!'

Greg Lestrade said...

Exactly! You're man enough to take it. It's only my opinion... I just happen to think it's a very good one! ;)

John H. D. Watson said...

Fortunately, I know you are wrong, and my jumpers are festive and fantastic. Although probably not appropriate for crime scenes...I may need to remember that.

REReader said...

(I'm lucky I'm not going out with a woman, right?)

I think you'd be safe with that comment--either version--since it would clearly just mean you know nothing about women's fashions.

Just never suggest we look fat in that outfit. :D

Greg Lestrade said...

Danger - I don't know, blood and vomit is frequently present at crime scenes - they'll just think you didn't manage to avoid it all, got a bit on your jumper ;)

RR - happily fashion has nothing to do with style. I might not know anything about fashion, but I think I'm pretty good on style.

REReader said...

They are indeed totally independent of each other, and style is what lasts. :)

Unknown said...

Ella, here we say "brisk!" when it gets chilly. Anyone else learn the song about the Logger Lover when they were growing up, about how as it gets colder and colder he eventually buttons up his vest?
I think it got up in the 40s (F) today, which now feels balmy, where a few short weeks ago it was nippy. I suppose I'm adjusting as I do every year, however reluctantly, to the inexorable change.
"That's not what I would have chosen" = abject horror.
"everyone's entitled to my opinion" ... actually isn't that subtle. :) But I use it when I know I'm being opinionated and in danger of overbearing, so as to invite disagreement.
S

Kestrel337 said...

Yes, "well, that's DIFFerent" is pretty much "what were you thinking" in Minnesotan. "Slippery, especially on bridges and exit ramps" means there's been freezing rain for several hours (like today). "A little lunch" involves a full sized dinner plate, with coffee after. And a lot of older women seem to think that prefacing it with "Sweety, you know I love you" gives them a pass on whatever judgemental thing they are about to say.

REReader said...

I have friends from the Southern US for whom "Well, bless her heart" is how they say, "She has the brains of an earthworm."

Unknown said...

"Different" turned up in the comments to the article (the comments are hilarious, worth every page)
>What the Minnesotans say: "Well, that's different."
>What the Minnesotans mean: "That's bad. Take it back to New York where it belongs."
>What is understood: "Gee, isn't it great that we can celebrate our differences."
I like Kholly's translation too. :D
S

Kira said...

Love the 'well bless her heart'.... in schools we often talk about 'little treasures', you can guess which kids we mean!

When I was behind a bar we always noted phrases beginning with 'Mate' or 'Look mate'... they generally meant, find the bouncer now!!

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