15 October 2011

If you can't stand the heat...

I'm speechless. Literally. Well, slightly getting over it now, but when we got back to the flat, I was speechless.

Everything seemed normal. Well, looking back on it, Mrs Hudson greeting us in the hallway was...unexpected. And her following us up to flat was unusual, but I suppose we just thought she was pleased we were back...




And then, we dumped our bags in the sitting room, because obviously before anything else happens John is going to have to make a pot of tea. And something's different. Something's...brighter. The sitting room seems, weirdly, more spacious.

Turning around, there it is...our kitchen. Or rather, NOT our kitchen. A kitchen which in no way resembles ours. It's clean and white and new and beautiful.

Whilst we've been away, Mrs Holmes has arranged to have our old, dark, 70s kitchen ripped out, and replaced by this new, clean, bright, white-and-grey and...and well, I think I dropped everything I was holding and walked toward it, zombie like. Maybe drooling a bit.

And it's real. And...yeah, well words still aren't exactly my strong point. but it's real. I can see it from here. It's...well, it's everything I've already said. White, easy-wipe-clean cupboards, and the top ones with frosted glass. And grey worktops, and still all our old appliances, because they were fine, but now...the walls are white, too, not dark green, and somehow, even though there are more cupboards, it seems so big, and there's a new sort of table/worktop, and it's got wheels, and the floor's new, and light wood, and everything's just amazing. And now instead of the old strip light and the window which seemed to let in a sad amount of light, we've got lights under the top cupboards as well as the ceiling, and because it's all shiny and light it seems so bright and...and it's going to take me weeks to stop thinking I've walked into the wrong flat.

And John says I have to point out there is a drawer just for pastry cutters.

I'm going to spend quite a lot of tomorrow just sitting in it and staring. Maybe I'll even dare to cook something. Sherlock has opened every cupboard and drawer since he got back, and has already planned about a million things to cook.

When Mrs Holmes dropped Sherlock back she just smiled politely as I managed not to form complete sentences and John stepped in to thank her properly.

184 comments:

John H. D. Watson said...

He also kissed one of the cupboards. Thought you all should know.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I would have hugged it, but it's stuck to the wall...

John H. D. Watson said...

As long as there was no tongue I shall try not to be too jealous.

It really is amazing though. I wasn't expecting...anything like this. Ever.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

There was no tongue!

There's a wine rack - a small one, but still. And...and...no, and I can't believe it. It seems like it should belong in some posh designer flat.

Mrs Holmes, you're...amazing. And scheming. But in an amazing way. We'll invite you round to consume some of the baked goods Sherlock is planning to make.

John H. D. Watson said...

Some of the few thousand...

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

That's why we'll need help.

I can't believe how much bigger it seems! Now everything's got a home, and it's all light and clean and...big.

John H. D. Watson said...

Heh. You look like you want to clap your hands and bounce with glee like Sherlock.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Yeah, you know when you went to the toilet, before?...there may have been bouncing. And possibly hand clapping. And spinning around on the spot.

Possibly.

But given the smile that's threatening to split your face in half, you can't blame me.

John H. D. Watson said...

Well. It's beautiful. Much nicer than anything I've had before. And you and Sherlock look so happy, how can I help it?

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

It makes the whole flat seem bigger. And more spacious. And really highlights our slightly scary wallpaper!

And now you can cook in comfort...

John H. D. Watson said...

With my jolly big wok?

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

precisely. And you know, I could help you out with your jolly big wok if you wanted... the offer is there. Always.

John H. D. Watson said...

Are you suggesting some late night cookery?

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I am ready and willing any time of the day, Danger, you know me. Always happy to lend a hand.

Becca said...

I am in awe of your new kitchen! I always took kitchens for granted, and then I moved into an apartment with an unusable and nonfunctional one. Suffice it to say that there was only one drawer, five inches wide, and it got worse from there.

kholly said...

Wow, I'm not even much of a cook and I'm somewhat jealous.

Actually I think I'm most jealous of John who not only gets a new kitchen but also someone inside of it who enjoys cooking as well as helping him with his wok.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Yeah, the old one was...functional. But badly designed, and dark. The new one is like...nothing I've ever had before.

And Danger, you can choose what we have for tonight. I'll just stand her and run my hand over this worktop. And the new sink. And the cupboard handles. And...stuff.

X said...

That's brilliant! What a surprise gift. Mrs. Holmes, you're lovely. :)

I love the mental image of you spinning with glee and clapping, L! Glad that th gobsmacked-ness you alluded to in your comment before was for something so great. Though, certainly, I will say you two deserve such a nice surprise with all the hard work and love and cooking you're putting into looking after the boys. <3

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

It is brilliant. She left a card on the new table, saying nice things about watching Sherlock cook when we were in the fort.

I can't wait for Mycroft to come back and see it.

John H. D. Watson said...

L - just remember, no tongue!

Hm...maybe some kind of stir fry thing?

Anon Without A Name said...

Blimey, Lestrade, the way you're going on it's a good job it's got wipe-clean surfaces :-p

I think it's rather sweet of Mrs Holmes (not a word I normally associate with her); maybe, after the well-intentioned but perhaps slightly misguided offer of money, this is her way of properly welcoming you to the family?

Also, I agree with KHolly :-)

Elizabeth said...

...............So someone else has thought of WonderBum. True, it's a joke video, but...I really hope that the woman you were talking to hasn't seen it, Lestrade.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Danger, stir fry? You are just desperate to get your wok out!

Nameless - yeah, we sort of thought the same. And this is far, far better than money, because we can all enjoy it and it just makes the flat so much nicer for all of us.

X said...

Hahah! Thanks for sharing, Elizabeth! John, is that the real reason you wouldn't loan L a pair of your boxers? They were too Wonderbum-iful?

L, I'm sure after observing Sherlock cooking in the fort, Mrs H knew that wipe clean surfaces were very important indeeeeeed.

X said...

Also, kholly, I'm with you. I could burn a salad in terms of my cooking "skills."

John H. D. Watson said...

L - on the contrary, I want to see what you can do with your wok.

Elizabeth - ...I don't even know what to say to that video. I also hope she hadn't seen it!

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I'm fairly sure you've seen my wok in action enough to know what I'm capable of...steaming hot and satisfying, right?

Come on, we'll see what's in the cupboards. If we can find where everything is.

John H. D. Watson said...

You and your wok are indeed smoking hot.

Right, let's go rifle through your drawers.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

our drawers.

(technically Mrs Holmes' or Mrs Hudson's drawers - but let's not go there.)

John H. D. Watson said...

You realise that means you keep your wok in their drawers...

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

It's not my wok!

And it's in a cupboard. Although personally I prefer to keep mine hanging free.

John H. D. Watson said...

Does that mean you...rock out with your wok out?

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I..am lost for words. Again.

I think you're hanging around with someone who makes too many bad, smutty jokes or something. You used to be such a nice boy.

John H. D. Watson said...

I probably shouldn't be as proud of myself as I am right now. Really. At all.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Hang on. I'll be back to cook just as soon as I've called your Mum... let's see, ah, under Mum&Dad in your phone.

And I've locked the door, so don't try and stop me.

John H. D. Watson said...

Don't you dare!

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

it's ringing...

John H. D. Watson said...

I will break the door down if I have to!

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

shh, it's hard for her to hear me with that banging

John H. D. Watson said...

Lestrade!

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

No, the fact it was champagne doesn't make his drunkeness any better, Mrs W. And that sort of innuendo about the 'family' kitchen really isn't nice.

John H. D. Watson said...

You are not really calling her. I don't believe it.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

and he never even told you he'd been an underwear model? really? He seems so proud, though.

John H. D. Watson said...

If you're not out of there in two minutes, I'm going for pizza.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Well, lovely chatting - yes, I'm sure you do need time to think about what to do. But I'm sure you know best. I'll tell him to expect your call later in the week. Byeee!

John H. D. Watson said...

I don't believe it for a second. You're not that mean. And you're scared of my mum.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

all these things you have to ponder, Danger. Was I wearing boxers? Have I called you Mum?

Not scared of her now. But you should be...she sounded stern.

John H. D. Watson said...

If you did actually call her, I hope you're prepared to be boxerless for the foreseeable future.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I keep spares at work.

You could call her, check. "Scuse me, Mum, did Lestrade just call you and tell you I was being smutty and scandalous in our new kitchen and that I'd once been an underwear model...?"

John H. D. Watson said...

Or I could just check my phone and see if you've dialed out at all.

...You called Sally?? I hope you didn't tell her about your wok.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

It's not my wok.

You don't want to know why I called Sally. Not yet.

Anyway, I called your Mum off my phone, having got the number from yours.

John H. D. Watson said...

...Why did you call Sally?

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Would you believe 'to report you for crimes against humour' and 'to invite her to tea'?

John H. D. Watson said...

I have no trouble believe the first one, even though it's completely your fault.

How can you make inviting her to tea sound like a euphemism?

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I'll add 'false accusations against a police officer'. And I didn't make it sound like that! That's your smutty little ears hearing it like that. Or...given it's written down, your smutty eyes reading it like that.

Seriously...I was hoping they'd have called to say I didn't need to go back to Italy.

John H. D. Watson said...

Did they?

I do not have smutty eyes!

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

You must have. The feelings I get when your gaze falls upon me are certainly smutty, anyway. They're like...smut lasers.

No. Which means...I think I'll have to go on Tuesday. But I'll just go stupidly early and return stupidly late. Hopefully.

John H. D. Watson said...

Jetting to Italy for a day ought to be more glamorous.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Yeah, it should. Can't imagine much less glamourous than flying, spending all day at an inquest, and flying back though.

John H. D. Watson said...

At least it won't take long.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Yeah. And you can have a nice dinner cooked for me when I get back :)

John H. D. Watson said...

I will.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

right. going to try to persuade Sherlock it's bedtime. Past bedtime. And that the fridge can't cope with many more pictures stuck to it. And that the blackboard is for messages for each other, and if it's full of pictures then we can't fit messages on it.

John H. D. Watson said...

Hm...good luck...

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

i might need reinforcements.

John H. D. Watson said...

Be there in a second. What, you've forgotten how to do the voices?

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

he's just very awake. And hasn't stopped talking yet.

I'm going to start refusing to do voices if you keep on. Make you do all story duties instead.

John H. D. Watson said...

But you're so good at it!

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Mm. Flattery will get you nowhere.

Anyway, as I said, I haven't done any of the talking yet. And because he's been with his Mum, I'm only understanding about one in every 6 words he says anyway.

John H. D. Watson said...

Heh. I'll see what I can do.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Whatever he's on, I want some. How many six year olds are still going a million miles an hour at nearly 11pm?

John H. D. Watson said...

Well, he's had a very exciting time. And wants to tell us allllll about it.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Well, well done for pointing out to him that we all needed sleep if we were going to bake...everything, tomorrow.

John H. D. Watson said...

I definitely need sleep to watch you both bake your little hearts out.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

You're helping

you can be chief of the icing department

John H. D. Watson said...

I think I can handle that.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I know you said 'no' to Sherlock when he asked...but can I sleep in the kitchen? To make sure it's still there in the morning?

And to guide you when you go into tea-making autopilot and head to the wrong place for everything.

John H. D. Watson said...

Hmm. You're sure there's nothing I can do to entice you into sleeping in an actual bed?

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

there might be something...

John H. D. Watson said...

Well, I'm in bed. Where you sleep is of course up to you.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I'm just giving your jolly big wok a clean. I'd hate you to wake up tomorrow and realise you'd gone to sleep with a dirty wok.

it's not a good example to set.

John H. D. Watson said...

Oh my god... Do you feel your Lord of Innuendo title is slipping? Is that what this is? I promise you it's not!

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I'm just trying to keep our brand new kitchen tidy!

Honestly, you and your smutty mind.

John H. D. Watson said...

Lestrade! Stop ogling your cupboards and come to bed!

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Coming, darling.

I assure you, my cupboard love is only for...well, the cupboards.

John H. D. Watson said...

And their shapely handles.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I prefer your shapely handles.

But they wouldn't be suitable to have in the kitchen to open doors...

Come here. I'll show you exactly what the Lord of Innuendo has which could be slipping anywhere...

John H. D. Watson said...

That's better.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

better than?

John H. D. Watson said...

Declaring your undying to love to the kitchen while I was in bed by myself!

Rider said...

Better than cleaning the wok that can't appreciate it instead of the one that can?

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I'm not cheating on you with our new kitchen.

I don't lust over our hob nearly as much as your...

or that wok as much as your...

John H. D. Watson said...

Ha. I believe you, m'lord. Come on, put the phone away.

Ria said...

First class innuendo, gentlemen. I heartily approve. Congrats on your shiny new kitchen! I'm envious.

Good night, all. Won't be commenting much for the next couple days because I'm on vacation in New Orleans! Seems like it's a good week to be away from home.

REReader said...

Well, I've got home and caught up, and it certainly sounds like a memorably wonderful time was had by all--and that coming home was very nearly as great, which is totally awesome. I mean, NEW KITCHEN, woo hoo! (And I adore tipsy love posting much. Not to mention general glee and merriment. And innuendo. :) )

Sherlock, I hope you'll share some of what you did with your Mummy with us!

As for my holiday--we got to eat three entire rainless meals in the sukkah (well, it did start mizzling during dessert of one of them, but we stuck it out!), were totally rained out for one, and for two of the meals we had to give up and parade back into the house when we saw all those raindrops dancing in our soup plates. And of course a parade of people carrying soup plates is pretty entertaining. (Okay, we're easily entertained!)

kholly said...

You know it occurs to me that this is a rather impressive demonstration of how remarkably powerful Mrs. H is. How long were you gone? I mean maybe she had all the measurements already and so could have the design work done ahead without your knowing, but the last person I know to have a kitchen gutted and remade the workers were in for like 3 weeks and then after there was endless fiddling to get everything right. An entire kitchen in just a few days? She's the most powerful woman in the country.

X said...

ReReader, I'm glad to hear that you got some rainless meals in. It started pouring here in Southern Ontario Tuesday morning and hasn't let up since. Went from 28C and sunny last Saturday to -2C today. Blah. But as the weather turned bad, I was wondering how things were treating you. Sorry some of the meals were called on account of rain, though the soup plate procession does sound fun.

L, I can't believe you threatened to call his mum, when youve clearly been the corrupting influence here. ;) I'm sure Sally will back us up on that one! Glad that you've managed to prise yourself away from the kitchen and get some ...sleep. Etc.

And aw, poor Sherlock with so many stories to tell and so few hours! I imagine he crashed pretty hard once you got him to slow down enough to consider sleep? I know my niece (who is admittedly younger, at 4), does that -- the trick is to get her to stay still long enough for her body to catch up to the fact that she's tired.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Kholly - its really just the cupboards that have been changed. And the worktops, so nothing too superhuman. But it makes a massive difference.

Does anyone want to come round for tea? We have a European cake mountain to get through. I think I'll be taking some to work. And Sherlock some to school. And Danger will be selling it from the front step.

REReader said...

It's tempting!

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I'm just waiting for Anthea to use the power of thought to kill me for such a serious security breach as inviting the whole internet over for tea.

REReader said...

:D

Well, you didn't get so carried away with delight as to give us an address, so I think she'll understand. Especially if you bring some goodies to her and Mycroft the next time you go visit him...

Anon Without A Name said...

Which would be a shame, because I was just thinking I could do with some nice homebaked cake (and I'm feeling too lazy to do any baking). Maybe you could post some out to us all?

(Hah - my captcha was "torypeni", which makes me think it's got the inside scoop on the next sex scandal to hit the tabloids)

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Fairly sure that if I start entering our address into here the laptop would slam shut on my fingers or something.

REReader said...

No, no, they like you! It would probably just come out as something else.

(As if you would.)

Maybe you'd be better off setting up the cake equivalent of a lemonade stand. Hey, Famous Amis got rich selling cookies, it could work for you!

REReader said...

AmOs. Famous Amos. Stupid virtual keyboard!

John H. D. Watson said...

He's going to be even busier after he retires. Flower shop, bake shop, writing career...

REReader said...

It's good to have options! He'll just have to pick one that you two will enjoy the most, hmm? ;)

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I'm not going to retire. Ever.

REReader said...

Switch careers, then? Or just moonlight. (Or, you know, not. And just play with on the side. Seems you're already doing that last!)

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I firmly believe that when I die NSY will put a robot arm on my cold dead body and still have me in the corner, signing of case files and risk assessments.

REReader said...

Oh, no! No, surely by then--in 70 or 80 years--they'll just upload your brain into a computer and have it deal with all crime-solving by itself...

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

ha! I don't think it's my brain they want (very low standards if it is)- and unlike Danger, it's not even my body! It's just the rank and the fact that anybody signing their life away who isn't you is a great asset!

(signing off, by the way, obviously. Not of.)

REReader said...

Now, now. If you don't believe me, ask John. :)

(And I read it as "off", not "of"!)

Anon Without A Name said...

Heh, now I'm imagining one robot arm signing off paperwork, one writing new instalments of Back To the Fuchsia.

Would you have a jolly big robot wok, too?

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Danger's the one with the jolly big wok.

Also, it's Danger's turn on Back to the Fuchsia.

I'm stuck in that awkward zone of sugar/caffeine high and being utterly knackered all at once.

REReader said...

Has Sherlock run you that ragged already?!

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

John kept me up late. Sherlock woke me up very, very early. Holding an egg. And I don't mean one still in it's shell...it wasn't a situation that allowed for five minutes more sleep.

REReader said...

They say being a self-starter is a very positive character trait.

(Bahahahahahahaha!)

REReader said...

Also, clearly an early night is called for. On all counts.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

yup, I think so.

Anon Without A Name said...

I'm sure you could think of some other robotic appendage that would be useful. Do Lords of Innuendo carry sceptres?

And I don't mean one still in it's shell

*gigglesnort*

I'm now baking cakes. Well, two loaves of banana bread, to be exact. I'm hold you entirely responsible for this uncharacteristic outbreak of domesticity, Gregory Lestrade.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Why is everything my fault??

They sound good, though.

Yes, this morning was quite..special. I was very very fast asleep, when there was a thud, the door opening to admit some very bright light and Sherlock, then, instead of his usual leap onto the bed, a patter of feet, and him saying 'Lestrade, I need your help with baking!'

So obviously I groaned something incomprehensible about earliness. And he said 'Now!', but not in a demanding way - in a 'help!' sort of way. So I opened my eyes to find his cupped hands, filled with egg, about an inch from my face/

'The egg didn't work properly!'

And John doing a really bad job of pretending to still be asleep...

(Danger, we need to change the sheets. Those weird stains are egg. I assure you.)

REReader said...

Heeheeheehee!

But really--it's good that Sherlock knows to ask for help when he needs it, and that he knows when he needs it.

And very EXCELLENTLY good that he got you up before turning on a fire, even in an oven.

Desert Wanderer said...

Shame on you, John! Playing possum like that. How long after he was out of the room did it take you to start laughing?


(I probably would have did hid, too...)

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

RR - he knows very well that he mustn't climb on anything or do the oven on his own. But he does occasionally try to 'help' by getting things ready, still, and he can reach the eggs in the fridge.

DW - what makes you think I was out of the room before he started laughing? That or he was having a slight fit in his sleep...

John H. D. Watson said...

Laughing? What? I was definitely absolutely asleep...

I will change the sheets though.

REReader said...

The price of expertise.

And as I said, excellently good. And hey, helpful is good!

(I'm sure you were just having a very amusing dream, John...)

Sherlock said...

I am helpful and the egg wasn't my fault it broke wrong and I caught it but then I didn't have hands left to do anything so i got Lestrade.

Lestrade and John are being silly now. John was changing the bed clothes and Lestrade's wrapped a sheet all over him and isn't letting him go so John's trapped and looks a bit like a ghost.

REReader said...

I agree, Sherlock--helpful is good, and I'm sure it's quite helpful to have all the ingredients set out and ready to go. And eggs are like that. When I break eggs, I usually have to fish out bits of at least one eggshell, or my cakes would all be crunchy, and not in a good way!

Maybe you should take a picture of John and Lestrade being silly...

REReader said...

And now I am off to Brooklyn for a sukkah party at my other sister's house. Back in 4 hours or so--have a good evening, all!

Sherlock said...

Lestrade does eggs with one hand but I tried it and it doesn't work.

I have to go to bed now but I hope you have a good sukkah party. I don't see why they make you not eat one day and then when you have a nice celebration when you can eat then you're not allowed a computer. I don't think I'd like either of those things but thank you for telling me about them because it's interesting.

Anon Without A Name said...

Lestrade, not everything is your fault. Just unexpected outbreaks of domesticity. Oh, smut and innuendo as well, of course :-)

Sherlock - it sounds like you were being extremely helpful; and I'm very impressed that you managed to catch the egg. Maybe you could ask Lestrade to show how you can crack eggs so they're more likely end up in the bowl rather than you needing to catch them? I remember he said that he cracks eggs one-handed, which lots of grown-ups (including me) can't do.

John - you're a bad man. A very bad man :-p

Small Hobbit said...

Lestrade, not everything is your fault, just most things clearly. And the egg must have been because you can break them with one hand (so can I, but it does result in a lot of egg on the floor) and Sherlock was only trying to copy you.

John H. D. Watson said...

I can't break them in one hand either. It's probably not a skill I'll acquire, but Sherlock seems determined.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

You could easily acquire it. As could Sherlock, when age provides him with larger hands.

Let's all stop focussing on fault, and turn our attentions to there words of truth written by Nameless:

John - you're a bad man. A very bad man

Yup.

John H. D. Watson said...

And you called me a nice boy just yesterday. So fickle.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

You're a nice bad boy.

John H. D. Watson said...

Ha. I think that's you.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I'm a nice good boy. I must be, I gave our elderly neighbours baked goods.

You, on the other hand stayed in bed whilst I got covered in egg whilst only wearing my boxers at 5am. Not nice. Mean. I may have to punish you.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Or just call your mum again...

John H. D. Watson said...

You're the domestic deity around here! Getting covered in egg is definitely your job, not mine.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

You're a domestic deity in training.

Come on, bed, you can make it up to me.

John H. D. Watson said...

Only if you promise not to call my mum.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Might be too late for that...

Ha. I promise.

It's cold, isn't it? My feet are freezing. Come and be my Danger-shaped hottie in bed.

John H. D. Watson said...

And you've found one more way to make me yelp. Christ, they're like ice.

REReader said...

Sherlock--

Lestrade does eggs with one hand but I tried it and it doesn't work.

I've seen that done on tv, but I can't do it either. My sister-in-law can break eggs with one hand, but since she (and my brother and their son) lives in Israel and I live in New York, she hasn't been able to teach me yet. Maybe some day!

I have to go to bed now but I hope you have a good sukkah party.

I had a very nice sukkah party! It's always nice to spend time with my sisters and their families, even though it gets kind of loud and excited. Or maybe because it gets loud and excited. :) Also the food was really good!

I don't see why they make you not eat one day and then when you have a nice celebration when you can eat then you're not allowed a computer. I don't think I'd like either of those things

You put that very well. Of course, on Yom Kippur, when we can't eat, we also can't use the computer--or turn lights on or off, or use money, or use the telephone, or watch tv or listen to radio or any kind of recorded music or travel anywhere--even walk very far--or write, or draw, or a whole lot of other things. It's because on all Torah holidays--holidays that are set in the Torah (Old Testament), as opposed to holidays that were set later by the Rabbis--we can't do "work", and the same is true for Shabbat, which is from sundown Friday to full dark on Saturday. And the "work" that we are not allowed to do isn't regular work, as in things you do that are hard or that you get paid for. The Torah uses an unusual word for this kind of work, and that word is really only used in two contexts--in connection with Shabbat and holidays, and in connection with building the Tabernacle. So the way we understand it is that the 39 categories of work the Rabbis identified as being involved in building the Tabernacle and the things used in it are the categories of work we can't do on Shabbat.

Now, until I was in my late 20s, I felt pretty much the way you said--I didn't like it very much. I mean, so many things I like to do to relax or enjoy myself I couldn't do on the one day a week I didn't have to help around the house or do homework or run around taking care of things, which seemed very unfair. I eventually realized that the only reason I didn't have to help around the house or do homework--and later work work--and run around doing errands and stuff was BECAUSE it was Shabbat. And also, as I got older, I started to really like not being able to do all those things. Because it means that I have a day every week where I can be quiet, and read and think and not fuss and not be bothered. Ask John and Lestrade--your mother, too--how they'd feel about having a whole day every week just to be quiet and and unreachable unless someone wanted to go to the effort of coming over in person. I think they'll think that would be a very nice idea--a special gift, even.

thank you for telling me about them because it's interesting.

You are very, very welcome. If you have more questions ever, ask, and I'll answer as soon as I see the questions.

REReader said...

And sorry if I'm hijacking the thread again. If you'd rather I cut it out, just tell me, I promise I won't be at all offended. Maybe you could work out a way for Sherlock to contact me with questions other than here. Or maybe he won't have any more questions. (It's possible!)

Hope you are all having a good night's sleep before resuming your routines tomorrow! (If I dare use the word "routine". It seems not perfectly applicable, somehow...)

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Danger - you did a wonderful job of warming me up though. You are hot stuff.

RR - absolutely not! You're giving me an education as well as Sherlock. And probably a few other people! It's great.

REReader said...

:)

Tink said...

Greg: What was the name of the Chinese herbal stuff you took again? I, uh, possibly may have a tickle in my throat.

RR: Keep it going here hon! There's too much interesting stuff to learn for you to move it.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Tink - Nin jiom pei pa koa. I think.

RR - one day a week when you can't do anything does indeed sound very special. I can't imagine Sherlock will agree, but I can definitely see the appeal.

REReader said...

Well, as I told Sherlock, it took me until I was well into my twenties before I even began to see the appeal myself. Ditto the appeal of naps, which is something else there is time for on Shabbat.

Mmmmm, naps.

Tink said...

Greg: I'll see if I can find some somewhere. The headache that's coming with the tickling sucks enough that I'm probably going to go to sleep despite my slightly messed up sleep schedule. Take care my friend!

RR: You only realise the value of naps once puberty kicks in I think. Night m'dear!

REReader said...

Tink--I was a late bloomer, it's true--but not THAT late!

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

RR - I think I meant more that I doubt Sherlock would see the appeal of John and I having a day a week when we couldn't do anything, but I think yiur answer still stands :)

Tink - hope you feel better soon.

Mycroft said...

Lestrade, if you really do have too much cake to eat, then you could drop some off at school. We're allowed things like that, and some people's families have already sent parcels.

But only if it's no trouble and you've got enough.

Can you take a picture of the new kitchen to show me, too, if you do come up? Thank you.

Mycroft said...

I forgot to say, I've only got a very short time free between dinner and evening study time, but you can always leave it at my house. Only if it really isn't any trouble though.

REReader said...

Ha! Yeah, Lestrade, I doubt Sherlock would like it much either way.

Excellent idea about the cake, Mycroft--teenagers can put away any amount of cake and still look for more. (At least, this was certainly true of my male relatives. :) )

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

No, It's fine. We have way too much. And I won't be around tomorrow, so there's definitely spare cake and biscuits. If John can pack some up I'll courier to you. What time?

Mycroft said...

Between 7.45 and 8 would be best. Thank you. I'm sure everyone will appreciate it.

kholly said...

I am certain you are having no trouble making friends Mycroft. On the other hand, home baked goods will definitely make you popular for the evening. And a nice way to sneak in a hug from Lestrade when he drops them off.

John H. D. Watson said...

L - It's all packed up. I don't think I realised just how much there was. I sent some to school with Sherlock as well, and we've still got some left.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I think we outdid production of most commercial bakeries.

Having a nice day? Did you get a chance to fetch my suit from the cleaners?

John H. D. Watson said...

Yeah, we've just been to get it, on the way home now. Is that for Italy?

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Yeah. Make an attempt to look half professional, whatever they end up thinking of me.

John H. D. Watson said...

I'm can't imagine they'll think you're anything but professional and very good at your job. As long as you remember not to use outdated teenage slang.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Mm. Given the way it ended up, I can't pretend I'm not a bit nervous.

Fio's going to help me with understanding the medical and legal jargon.

Has Mycroft phoned you? He texted to say he would because there's a book somewhere in his room he wants me to pick up too.

John H. D. Watson said...

But there's no question of them blaming you for any of it surely? You did everything you could.

There are four books and a jumper and some bit off one of his computers. So far...

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

No, nothing like that. Although I wouldn't be surprised if they found the police response in general a bit lacking - because it was. It's just the whole cross examination, justifying your actions, and I don't know if he had family who might go or anything. And you know, you always question yourself in hindsight anyway, when it goes wrong, so...yeah. bad enough doing these here, where I know how it all works.

Shall we ask to borrow a truck? Sounds like I migration need one...

John H. D. Watson said...

Ah, of course. Not pleasant. I'm glad you've got Fio to walk you through it a bit. I'll still come if you want moral support.

Heh. Migration.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

It'll be okay. Anyway, what'd we do with Shortstuff?

Well it does sound like he's gathering enough stuff for migration.

John H. D. Watson said...

If it's only one day, Mrs Hudson could watch him after school.

There's a pair of shoes now too.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I might not have mentioned I'll be leaving the flat about half three tomorrow morning. Gatwick for 4, 2 hour check in, fly just after 6...

And you'd be bored rigid.

We will come to Italy though. Promise. I mean, go to Italy.

John H. D. Watson said...

It just gets less and less glamorous, doesn't it? All, just saying.

How's work?

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

All what?
Work is a mountain of paperwork everyone decided could wait for my return, and a lot of detectives eating cake and getting icing on files and crumbs in keyboards. So not too bad, if a bit tedious.

John H. D. Watson said...

I...have no idea what I meant when I typed that. Huh.

Heh. Cute.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Hey, there's only one detective you need to find 'cute' around here.

It would be great to have you there - don't think I don't appreciate it. But you wouldn't even understand what was being said. It would be horrible. I'm not even sure you'd be allowed in. And...well, you don't need to relive the bloke's last hours any more than I do.

Sally says she sends compliments to the chief of icing. Or I think that's what she said. Her mouth was full of pink cupcake.

John H. D. Watson said...

Can't help it. Tell them they have a lot in common with Sherlock's class right now. They were all getting icing and crumbs on everything when I went to pick him up.

Ha. Tell her she's very welcome, not that I had much to do with it.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I should get Mrs T down here sorting my lot out. Only fair, after I had to teach hers...

John H. D. Watson said...

I bet she could do it, too.

John H. D. Watson said...

...And she'd make them nap after lunch. Ha.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I think half of them do anyway, some days.

Tink said...

Greg: Hey, woke up with a migraine, and the tickle had developed into a cough, but I'm all doped up with meds and I took a rather exorbitantly long hot shower and I think I've managed to knuckle everything under by force. I hope going to Italy for the day does not suck.

Sally: So which was your favourite baked good?

John: We'll keep you company while Greg's in the air!

REReader said...

There are four books and a jumper and some bit off one of his computers. So far...

Bike, Mycroft, not a minivan! :)

.And she'd make them nap after lunch.

I imagine it would do them all a world of good.

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