14 June 2012

Scared to confess

"Deep in my heart I'm concealing things that I'm longing to say. Scared to confess what I'm feeling - frightened you'll slip away."

Day Ten: One confession.

Confess: To disclose (something damaging or inconvenient to oneself)

Been thinking about this one for the last few days. Knowing it was coming. And I wasn't really sure I had anything I wanted or needed to confess. No childhood misdeeds, or pranks I was never caught for at school. No skeletons, really - stupid to have, in this job. No dark deeds of adulthood that have been gnawing away at me.

So you're getting something that's been in the back of my mind more recently. Something I've wondered about saying out loud before, but never have.


 It was number four. And you don't need to be paranoid. We can talk about it. Now I've written this, I think I'll actually feel a lot better if you know.






For the rest of you, I disappeared earlier because I wasn't dealing with the whole idea of getting my back sorted very well, and, if I'm honest, some of the comments made me feel as if I was being whiny and pathetic. So I just went and sat in the park until I was dealing with things better, and John called, which helped.

96 comments:

Sherlock said...

That's a stupid confession I thought maybe you might have murdered someone but only someone who deserved it. If you're at home tomorrow we can go to the park and have cake or ice cream and a milkshake and we can try to find more turtles because I'm really good at finding them better than John.

Anon Without A Name said...

I'm so sorry if I made you feel worse about how you're dealing with your back problem; that absolutely wasn't my intention, but I can see now that it probably looked that way.

Sorry.

John H. D. Watson said...

I did think it might be, assuming I was on the list at all. We can talk about it, yeah. Here, or when Sherlock's in bed, or-- whatever you want really.

Sherlock - you are indeed better at finding them than I am.

pandabob said...

I don't understand the confession but then I think I might not be supposed to.

I don't know if me suggesting John come with you to the osteopath was the wrong thing to do I'm sorry if it was. I really meant it when I said I could understand you not really feeling comfortable going and I just thought John being with you would maybe help you feel more comfortable.

I'm sorry for anything I said that caused you upset I would never want to do that.

Anonybob

REReader said...

I most sincerely hope I didn't make you feel bad, L--I was only trying to make you smile a little. I know from experience that it's never fun having someone handle a part of you that already hurts.

(I did wonder if #4 might be about John, but we weren't asking, so I didn't want to guess--fair play and all that.)

Greg Lestrade said...

Sherlock - you also come home with half the park still attached to your clothes and a good deal of pond in your shoes. John doesn't. And he still sees turtles. I think perhaps he just knows the right tool for the job. And you, Sherlock, are the best turtle-finding tool he has.

Nameless - No, it was...a combination of things. Anyway, appointment tomorrow, meeting John straight after as he should have cured the sick of London by the time I'm done.

John... I won't. For a variety of reasons. I think it's a little bit like the urge you get to jump over a cliff just because you're standing at the top. Or something.

John H. D. Watson said...

I know that feeling well. I think you'd have a difficult time of it anyway.

Greg Lestrade said...

ANonyBob - no, it wasn't. And I thought about it. But in some ways needing to explain why at 46 you need your boyfriend there to hold your hand is sort of worse than just lying there and concentrating on not puking on her feet or something. And I do sort of know her, which half makes it better. But last saw her many years ago...which sort of makes it worse.

pandabob said...

I hope you're ok Greg and I mean really ok.

good luck with your appointment and I'm glad John will be there after :-) have you planned yourselves a nice child free treat? (I know a bad back precludes a lot of the best things ;-) )

REReader said...

Oh, no, it was me. I can't apologize enough, L, I swear I never meant to do that...

Anonymous said...

Greg, you've had an awful lot of people leave you in your life it's not to be wondered at if you find yourself wondering what you're going to do that will get this person to leave you, it would almost be weirder if this didn't run through your mind. It's not a lack of trust, I'm sure, it's the new thing warring with horrid experience.

Anon Without A Name said...

OK, Lestrade. A tip from the days when I was at the chiropractor's a dozen times a year: if you're feeling really tense (and it sounds like you will be), and you need to relax your muscles to allow some spinal manipulation, wiggle your toes. Sounds daft, but focusing on wiggling your toes means you can't focus of keeping everything else clenched.

I hope you and John manage to talk, and maybe both find bit of peace of mind. That feeling you mention, of being tempted at the top of a cliff, is disconcertingly familiar.

If you're going to meet John, sounds like the p3erfect opportunity to treat yourself to something nice for having gritted your teeth and gone to the appointment :-)

Greg Lestrade said...

It wasn't anyone. It was a culmination of things.

Danger - I sort of never understood it, until I started dealing with a lot of violence, through the job. So...I know I can't apply this to everyone - to you, maybe - but I can try and explain it. Probably. And I expect you already know anyway, but...it'll help me to know you know.

So, growing up with a lot of violence, it means you don't have any control. And even as an adult, you still don't, I suppose, although you've got more, sort of, options, I suppose.

Anyway, the one thing I could always do - the only thing - was work out where someone's breaking point was. What would tip them over. I could read the signs, and knew exactly what to say and do, and then, that way, it's like a pressure cooker. I could do that, I could pick my time, my place, and get them angry and then they'd let off that steam. So I did. And then I had that little bit of control. It would still happen, but I controlled it, not them.

Didn't always work, but it helped.

So...yeah, maybe you don't have that in you. But sometimes you seem to worry you do. So then I worry I don't know when it might appear. Even though...well, I sort of do, a bit, now.

I've no idea if that makes any sense.

ryo said...

Lestrade,

I avoid going to the doctor too. In fact, a month or so ago, my back went into spasm (to the point that I could barely move at all) and I never went to the doctor for it. Just figured it'd get better on its own and eventually it did. That's not to say I made the right decision, but it wasn't wrong either.

I wonder if some of your number 4 urges are because, in the past, it hasn't been safe to do that much at all. Knowing where the line is might help you feel more secure (at least subconsciously). I think it's great that you are opening up the topic for discussion with John regardless.

That's something I really admire about y'all's relationship -- you take the time and make the effort to talk about difficult things.

ryo
(who never sees turtles in real life)

Greg Lestrade said...

Ryo - well, happily with the Doc I can usually avoid it!

I've tried to explain a bit about what my school report said was my 'apparent need to push boundaries in a destructive manner'... or somesuch.

And I didn't even know we had turtles in London until John was in my life...with Sherlock-the-turtle-hunter on our side.

Anonymous said...

I'd never considered this until recently Greg but spotting the signs of someone about to do something not too bad and tipping them into it before it builds into them doing something far worse is a skill you perfect when living with people who do things like that and not knowing how to spot the signs is pretty scary and can have pretty horrid results.

I can fully understand part of your mind wanting to know where the line comes so you can be prepared for it but I am as sure as I possible can be that John would never do you harm and that you would never do him harm so I hope that one day your mind may be at rest with it.

I will not be putting my name to this for reasons of my own.

ryo said...

Yeah, L, our posts were like two ships passing in the night. Can I borrow John and the boys for a week? Just for turtles? :)

ryo
(who is really, really going to go and start studying for that exam now)

Greg Lestrade said...

Anon - yeah, I'm as sure as I can be too. Or I wouldn't have let John in on the 'secret', so to speak. It doesn't work as well when the person knows they're being manipulated.

And honestly, I never really realised what Iwas doing until I saw other people doing it, on call-outs and stuff, and did training on dealing with domestic violence.

John H. D. Watson said...

So...yeah, maybe you don't have that in you. But sometimes you seem to worry you do. So then I worry I don't know when it might appear. Even though...well, I sort of do, a bit, now.

I'm sorry if I've made you worry. I think the things I worry about are more...being taken by surprise. Acting before I have time to think, not out of anger but out of instinct.

It wasn't always like that. I had a really appalling temper when I was younger, but...seeing some of the things I've seen... I don't know, I lost that, somewhere along the way. Lost a lot of things, but that was one of the more positive changes.

I don't know if any of that helps, or if anything would help, but I thought I should say it.

Greg Lestrade said...

I think what's mainly helped is seeing you 'in action', and it's only ever been to protect people, like the boys, or me.

And you didn't make me worry any more than I'd worry about anyone, really. Well, maybe sometimes, but less and less as time passes.

It does help. I love you.

John H. D. Watson said...

I love you too.

Anonymous said...

I never realised what I was doing till I got it wrong once!

I'm so glad you have John and you feel confident enough in him and in yourself that you can let him in on the most important of your defences.

John H. D. Watson said...

And when I think about it, I wonder if that explains some of Sherlock's behaviour during the first few weeks I was with them. Not that anyone hit him - I can't even imagine what Mrs H would've done to them - but he watched a lot of people leave.

Greg Lestrade said...

He definitely tests us. And was definitely testing you. And still does, every now and again. But I think that's part of growing up, because boundaries do change.

Whereas Mycroft was keeping you at arms length in the absolute politest way possible.

John H. D. Watson said...

Yeah. Everyone has their own defences, I suppose.

pandabob said...

before children will let you close they first have to push you as far away as they can manage and see that you always come back again especially when they are quite used to people leaving. That's why foster parents and people who adopt older children, or become such an important part of older childrens lives like you and Greg have, have such a hard job and are an inspiration when they get it right :-)

Greg Lestrade said...

I think it's a lot more alarming when people don't seem to have any!

So, dare to give me a backrub before bed? I don't want to get you in trouble with the osteo tomorrow when she asks which butcher tried his healing hands on me before she got her pro mitts on the job...

And Sherlock said there's some sort of meeting at the start of school tomorrow?

Greg Lestrade said...

(don't seem to have any defenses, I meant. AnonyBob got in there inbetween us...)

pandabob said...

I promise not to do that again ;-)

John H. D. Watson said...

I'll be very gentle.

Yeah, we're supposed to stay for ten minutes or so after school starts. Not sure what it's about. Are you coming with us?

Greg Lestrade said...

Sherlock told me I was going, so I must be :)

Then I'll walk you to work, then I'm free until my appointment.

John H. D. Watson said...

Ha. Well, you wouldn't have much luck sleeping in with him wanting you up. That sounds lovely.

Greg Lestrade said...

Mmm. Bed?

Tomorrow afternoon sort of depends how fragile I feel... could turn backflips all the way down Oxford Street. Might fancy going and floating in the pool. May have to insist you take me to bed. We shall see.

You...haven't confessed yet. Will I now have to wait until you're at work to read yours?

John H. D. Watson said...

Er...you might. I still don't know what to say, honestly. Of what I've thought of, one seems much too heavy for...anything. And the other isn't really very confession-y.

Bed would be nice.

Greg Lestrade said...

I can wait. Thanks for being so understanding about mine.

Im glad I told you.

John H. D. Watson said...

I'm glad you did too. Thank you.

Anonymous said...

If it's any help, even this late, I didn't think you were being whiny and pathetic, L. I was more concerned that you were being unnecessarily stoic, because that route hasn't worked very well at all for me.

I don't know what to confess to. Maybe being really really angry at the world right now, and yet totally ineffective at making a difference? Except that may not really be true. I had a seven year old kid with a hospital wristband on come into my library today after stealing some candy from the shop next door, and then ended up calling the police when I couldn't get ahold of his mother. He wound up leaving in an ambulance, because his mother wouldn't come for him, and she's going to wind up getting a mental evaluation. Almost two hours, with me sitting and playing Caillou games with him on the internet and watching Chuck E Cheese videos, and I don't know if I'll ever see him again or know what happens to him. But for that little space of time, he trusted me. And I feel like turning him over to the EMTs and DYS was a betrayal, but what else is there?

rsf

maz said...

Oh, RSF, I'm so sorry. You did the very best you could do, and hopefully things get straightened out with his mom and it works out so that he's protected and well cared for. But yes, heartbreaking to be a part of.

One confession. Eeep. Hokay.

I say and do those things deliberately. Because you're thoughtless and cruel sometimes, and you need to feel what its like on the other side. Not the best strategy, but I can't figure out what else to do to get through to you.

REReader said...

That's a horrible place to find yourself in, RSF--but I think you did make a difference. You made a child happy for a few hours, and you cared. That's lighting a candle, and it's important.

imachar said...

I hope everyone is sleeping well and you have a productive trip to the osteo tomorrow, Greg. And can I just second ( third? Fourth ? Sorry, a little toasted right now) the comments about respect for people who do a good job with kids that come to them later in life - that takes a measure of compassion and patience that I'm not sure I have...

And rsf you did a really good thing today, anyone who can give neglected kids a safe space, even for a while has done a truly righteous thing in my book.

As for my confession, I thought about this really hard, and I only have one really deep confession, something I've never really admitted to anyone else - although I know my husband knows...but

I don't miss my Dad....I didn't cry when he died, I haven't since and I don't miss him. It makes me feel, not guilty exactly, but not normal either. He wasn't a bad parent, he didn't hit me ( my brothers, yes, but not me) but he was gone almost all my life, and then I emigrated and I don't really feel like ever knew him.

Anyway, that's all ten days...just n time since I'll be out of touch for a couple of days...flying to Scotland to pick up my Mum and bring her over for a few week

Anonymous said...

Not as brave as you, L, so this'll have to be anon.

I am very terribly lonely, and I'm terrified choosing what I want means I'll be lonely for the rest of my life.

Anonymous said...

Another anon one

I'm going to die alone and part of me wants that to happen sooner rather than later

Greg Lestrade said...

RSF - sounds like you did everything you could for that kid. I hope the other people he now meets are as good to him as you were, and he can get his life stabilised again.

Anons - I hope your confessions make you feel slightly better? Not sure if we can do anything to help, but I'm sure we'll try.

Sherlock is very excited about our meeting at school. Hypothesising everything from school trips to CERN, sports day, news that 'his' pond is about to be turned into the largest body of open water in England... A day off, to go to the park... Well, you name it, he's thought about it.

Small Hobbit said...

RSF, you did a lot more for that kid than many would have done, and in the end you did the only thing you could to ensure that he was taken care of.

Imacher, I can understand how you feel. I don't miss my dad either - like you I'd been living away from home for many years and we had nothing much in common.

Anons, I think you're very brave to admit to something like this.

I hope the school meeting does mean something exciting, rather than a change in school uniform!

And L, best wishes for the osteopath.

Anon Without A Name said...

I hope the meeting is interesting - but not too interesting!

Hope the osteo session goes OK Lestrade, and that you and John have a good afternoon together.

I'm still thinking on my confession...

pandabob said...

I hope you're both OK anon's if there's anything we can do let us know and please look at this link :-)

http://pandabob1.tumblr.com/post/24903633459

I hope the school meeting was interesting and offered something exciting for Sherlock :-)

Good luck with your appointment Greg I hope it goes better than expected and that you and John have a nice afternoon together :-)

Greg Lestrade said...

So, yeah, exciting is one way to put it.

They got told that from now on, every Friday afternoon they'd spend with their new teacher for next year, to get used to it.

Sherlock is in meltdown. John's had to leave now to get to work, so Sherlock is now alternating between sobbing on my chest and hitting me and declaring he'll never go back to school ever and hates us all.

Some of the other kids are equally distraught.

I hope Mrs T takes it as a compliment...

pandabob said...

Oh poor Sherlock :-( I hope he's calmed down a bit now. Change is always a bit scary and Mrs T has been so good for him but hopefully a couple of afternoons with his next teacher will reassure him that they will care for him and stretch his mind just as well as Mrs T. :-)

Anonymous said...

You pick the best days to take off work don't you Greg? I strongly commiserate with both you and Sherlock. I can completely see it from his point of view, that sort of change is unsettling at best and he knows that lots of people don't 'get' him and how does he know that his new teacher won't be one of those people. Plus it's been an unsettled couple of weeks for him.

And this is certainly one of those times when being a grown up sucks and when being a good parent sucks, a worse parent would just take him home.

Lancs. Anon

Greg Lestrade said...

Well...i'm glad i am off, so i could stay there for a bit. I've left now, to get to my appointment.

I can honestly say it's worse not being there, knowing how upset he is. John didn't wNt to leave, either. He's probably had it worse, just thinking about it. At least I felt like I was sort of doing something.

Anyway, Mrs T's done this year on year, so now they're all drawing out their feelings about this. Well, Sherlock was refusing...and then I think was drawing someone being eaten by a monster. But it'll all help the teachers know what to do, Im sure.

And I've promised Sherlock John and I will go in early before the end of school and meet his new teacher and be there for a bit before home time.

Wolf-were said...

Didn't you say it was a pretty small school--do the classes share lunch/recess times? If so, Sherlock, maybe you could see her then.

REReader said...

Oh, dear, that's not at all what Sherlock had in mind. I'm so glad you were off today so that one of you could be there for him--I'm sure most of his classmates weren't so lucky. And I bet John is infinitely more happy that you were able to be there--would have been so much worse to have had to leave Sherlock like that if you hadn't been. Here's hoping he gets on with his new teacher in the end--at least in this school he'll have someone who has been well-briefed on what to expect.

And best of luck with your osteopath appointment!

Anonymous said...

Sherlock, love, I know it's hard to leave a teacher that you know and trust, and I'm glad that you will have time to learn to know and trust your new teacher before you start the next school year. I'm a little jealous actually. All through school I never had a chance to know who my new teacher would be, and I always went the first day in the fall with my stomach full of butterflies. I think the school is smart to have you meet the new teacher now, and silly to have made a big fat deal out of the announcement, so that you were waiting and thinking of nice surprises before you found out. That's like expecting ice cream and getting spinach for dessert. You know it's good for you but it isn't nearly as nice.

rsf (who has to go to work now, but will come back later)

Anonymous said...

This is completely of topic, but I hear that song and sought of you two :
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fVKPrQv1H8I
(careful with the young ones, some rude words)
I hope it makes you guys smiles after a stressful day.

Greg Lestrade said...

To be fair, I don't think the school did make a big deal of it. They just asked if parents could stay for a few minutes. And Sherlock has always known that Mrs T only taught the 4-6 year olds, no matter how much he wanted that to change just for him.

Hopefully the next few weeks will mean he finds out his new teacher is just as good as Mrs T.

And I survived osteo. She said she never felt anyone so tense. No shit.

pandabob said...

does your back feel any better?

I'm glad you got through it ok :-)

It's hard for schools to know what to do for the best with giving information like class changes out but I think having the adults there when the children are told about it is proably the right way to go, certainly for Sherlock :-)

Greg Lestrade said...

It does feel a little better. She certainly made a lot of things crunch. Feels a lot looser. And also sorted out a few other little aches and pains. Going back next week, now I've been brave enough once...

pandabob said...

good on ya :-) glad it feels a bit better.

Enjoy your afternoon, I hope Sherlock has had a good experience with his new teacher :-)

Anonymous said...

Parents being asked to wait after school can be a big deal when you're six. Any change in the routine is portentous. And Sherlock only has two years worth of data, unless Mrs. T has a lot of pictures of previous classes, and in those two years Mrs. T has stayed with his class, so I can see where he might have had hopes she would stay with his class. I've had a small person confide in tones of discovery that teachers don't grow like librarians do, though, so I've given up on thinking I can't be surprised by what kids assume is true or not.

Ah, well, I can tell I'm tired and cranky this morning because I'm being magniloquent again. Glad osteo got survived. I hope it helped.

rsf

REReader said...

Glad your back feels a bit better, L. And I hope next time will be less tense for you.

Sherlock, I hope you are feeling a bit better about the new teacher now that you've met her or him--especially keeping in mind that that person isn't exactly your teacher yet, but just someone you're getting to know a bit. They might even know some interesting things, and be a good person to know.

And Sherlock, my mother teaches first grade, which means she has new students every year. But quite often students from last year or even earlier years --sometimes from many years earlier!-- come over to her at recess or after school and talk to her and it always makes her very happy. (I know because she always tells me about it, it makes her feel so good.) And that is because as far as feelings go they will always be her students, and she will always be their teacher. So in that way you will always be Mrs T's student, and she will always be your teacher and she will always be happy to see you.

John H. D. Watson said...

It was hard leaving him there, but also maybe for the best. I don't think he ever would've calmed down with both of us there.

REReader said...

That sounds entirely likely, John.

How was he doing with the new teacher this afternoon?

John H. D. Watson said...

Ah...not great. Hopefully he'll get more used to the idea.

Kholly said...

I suppose it's the down side to having the same teacher for a few years. I went into school knowing it would be a different teacher every year. It wasn't an issue, it just was.

Greg Lestrade said...

Don't think he calmed down with me there. Just got worn out and changed tack.

He was glaring mutinously at his new teacher and sitting with his arms crossed kicking the desk when we got there.

Now he's glaring mutinously at us and throwing stones into a pond.

REReader said...

I'm sorry to hear it, but not entirely surprised-- I suspect he needs to wear the sharp edges off the idea first, maybe by talking about it? And hopefully the new teacher will prove adept at easing the transition. Does she or he seem nice?

ryo said...

How many Fridays will he have with the new teacher? The school has the right idea here of letting them get to know the new teacher before they have them all of the time. Tough dealing with the adjustment in the meantime, though.

Good luck with the back, too!

ryo

Anon Without A Name said...

Ooh, poor Sherlock. It must be difficult for him, given how much time and effort Mrs T puts into trying to smooth the way for him.

But my primary school was like Kholly's - a different teacher every year, so it was never unexpected, and we never got introduced to them in advance (although often we knew who they were from seeing them around school). I'm sure Sherlock will adjust to the idea slowly, which is presumably the whole point of the exercise.

I'm really glad the osteo appointment helped, Lestrade, and that you're going back next week. Wiggle your toes next time ;-)

Did the two of you manage to get any quality time alone today?

Greg Lestrade said...

Like I said, he and we have known this was going to happen. I think he was in denial though.

Nameless - I did wiggle my toes a bit! I just kept clenching them up too.

pandabob said...

You couldn't have done more to prepare him for the change than you have Greg and his reaction to it would have been the same whenever it became real so giving him time to get used to it before it's a perminant thing is the best that could be done really.

I hope he is able to calm down enough and talk about it enough for the rest of the weekend to be full of fun :-)

(in case anyone remembered my worry about pandacubs friend coming for birthday tea today, her mum was grateful for the distraction and she came and had a great time :-) her mummy is still holding on to the baby (34 weeks) so that's good to.)

REReader said...

In all fairness to Sherlock, it's one thing knowing something is going to happen in the distant future (and "next year" is very distant future when you're six) and being suddenly confronted with it now. Especially if it's something you don't want to have happen.

And I have to think it's easier to deal with a new teacher bit by bit than all at once, which is why I assume they worked out this way of introducing the reality of it. (And definitely better near the end of the year than at the beginning, what with having the whole summer holiday for it to sink in over.)

Greg Lestrade said...

Yeah, that's why they do it. They know a lot of the kids have difficulties with change to their routines.

And Sherlock already knows his new teacher in as much as it's a small school so everyone sort of knows everyone else. Just needs to get used to the idea of not seeing Mrs T all day every day.

We haven't quite got over the 'never going to school again' stage yet.

pandabob said...

I hope quiet blogs indicate sharing a lovely dinner and enjoying a nice evening together, maybe watching the football :-)

pandabob said...

I swear that wasn't there when I started writing that ;-)

REReader said...

There's the whole weekend yet. Hopefully some of the most jaggedy and sharp edges will have worn off the idea of not seeing Mrs T all day every day by then.

(Especially since there's still Monday through Thursday of seeing Mrs T all day every day for the next several weeks and it would be a shame to miss that.)

Do you all have any special plans for the weekend? And how's the back feeling now, L?

REReader said...

(FYI--I repeated your phrase because I really liked it, not for snarkiness or anything like that.)

Greg Lestrade said...

Back feels like I've had an armful of 6 year old for half the day.

Sherlock's got 5 weeks of Friday-afternoons to get used to the idea.

REReader said...

I'm sorry your back is feeling it now. He's so lucky to have you (and John).

5 weeks is a good length of time--just about long enough to establish a new routine. (Interestingly, in Jewish law, if you can't remember if you've done something or not--like say a seasonal prayer, or done some ritual--the rule is if you've been doing it for 30 days or more, you assume you've done it, because that's how long it takes to make things automatic. :) )

It makes sense that they'd have worked out the best way to do this, since it makes a LOT of sense that many extra bright children would react strongly to having their routines upset. I hope you all manage a nice, relaxed (or exciting) weekend despite it all.

Anon Without A Name said...

In a few weeks Sherlock'll have probably forgotten that he had problem :-)

I did wiggle my toes a bit!

Excellent :-) Really, I'm really impressed that you went along and did it, and that you're going back. Maybe next time, a bit more wiggling, a bit less clenching?

(Note: advice holds for other situations too ;-p)

Did you see the game?

Greg Lestrade said...

She's very...I don't know. Professional sounds obvious. Forthright, I suppose. Which I generally appreciate, but thought might also be...difficult. There are questions she could have asked which I didn't want to answer. Especially given last time I saw her was before I started having issues with this sort of thing.

But apart from commenting on my nipple rings and my general air of being relaxed as a coiled spring, it was okay.

Anonymous said...

Should Sherlock's glare be considered scarier than his pockets, I wonder?

I'm going to have to try the toe wiggling thing next time I visit the PT. Can't hurt, might help. And might be sooner than I want because I'm going to go sailing tonight, if at all possible and I know I'm asking for trouble. But it's been too long, and I've forgotten everything I know.

rsf

Anon Without A Name said...

OK. Sounds like there's a whole conversation there that you're not actually having, Lestrade. Which is fine, obviously, but it does sound like this whole situation is maybe more difficult and complex for you than, well, I realised, for one.

Anon Without A Name said...

Right, confession time: Given the rare opportunity to spend time with a large chunk of my family this weekend, I have deliberately chosen to avoid seeing them on Sunday, so that I don't run the risk of having to share communal Father's Day sentimentality.

Not sure if this makes me a very private person, or a cold, heartless cow, but either way the result's the same.

Greg Lestrade said...

RSF - Have fun sailing.

Nameless - sorry, didn't mean to be cryptic. It is difficult, but like most things, the thoughts about what could happen were far worse than it turned out. And next time I see her I'm sure I will be able to relax more.


All of you - seriously? Grumpy DI and Nanny Glare are neck and neck??

Desert Wanderer said...

Here's the thing, Lestrade. If we've done something to earn a Nanny!Glare, it's gonna piss you off at us for making Doc annoyed. And if we've earned the Grumpy!DI routine, Doc will be pissed off that we annoyed you. So, they're really one and the same.

They do say the family that glares together, cares together. Or something.

Small Hobbit said...

We like to treat you both equally ;)

Anonymous said...

Neck and neck, and yet Sherlock's pockets are still in the lead, while the glow in the dark hounds (what DOES Mycroft feed them?!) are lagging.

I think the DI and Nanny should just go ahead and start necking and leave the grumping and glaring to Sherlock.

rsf

pandabob said...

You're a canny scary thing when you're in a grump Greg! but not close to as scary as that thing behind me apparently ;-)

I don't think you've been cryptic but I think it's been clear that it was something you didn't want to do for many reasons, some of which you didn't really want to discuss with us, and that is why I personally was very happy for you that you did it, it helped and you decided to do it again :-)

Anon Without A Name said...

Like Anonybob, I don't think you were being cryptic; I suppose I just realised that it was a rather more difficult and complex subject for you than I had thought.

And don't blame me! I voted for the contents of Sherlock's pockets (I tend to ignore glaring and grumpiness :-p)

REReader said...

And I voted for that thing behind me, because the unknown is usually scarier than the known. :)

Greg Lestrade said...

I think the DI and Nanny should just go ahead and start necking

This was the reason I didn't use the phrase 'level pegging'...

Desert Wanderer said...

And yet you managed to slip it in there anyway. Though I'm not surprised. You do have some experience in the matter.

REReader said...

I din't even know what that means (although I can make a good guess at a secondary meaning, from the context... ;D).

Shabbat shalom--I hope you all manage to have a good and happy and pain-free weekend!

Greg Lestrade said...

Experience slipping things places? The only thing slipping anywhere for me right now is my discs, I assure you.

Going to drag my tired old carcass to bed. And hope a lovely doctor joins me.

Desert Wanderer said...

Probably for the best. Wouldn't want to slip something out while slipping something in. Hope your night is peaceful and pain-free.

ro said...

I have to vote for "the thing behind me". We've got a cute little mouse loose in our house, which is too canny to get caught in the ethical mouse trap. It's funny, but when I see it move out of the corner of my eye I completely freeze and feel all wiggy, even though I know what it is, and even though if I see it in front of me I'm not freaked out at all. It's only when I see it out of the corner of my eye. All of a sudden it could be anything, including a glow-in-the-dark, dog-sized rat-creature.

Glad the osteo visit helped, Lestrade. I've got my visit next week. My osteo *always* comments on how rigid my muscles are, no matter which bit he is working on. He's got me doing the wriggling-of-toes bit, too, because I think I *am* relaxing, when I'm really impersonating a plank.

Poor Sherlock, I hope he cheers up for the weekend. I'm positive he'll find the new teacher isn't so bad when he gets to know him/her.

Have a nice rest, guys!

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