22 April 2011

Just a quickie...

...Because Danger and I are going out on a date. Yes, you read that right, I'm not working, not stuck in the office, not working at home, Sherlock and Mycroft are in the care of Nicky and Mark...and we are going out.

I'm slightly wary about the film we're going to see...not because I don't think it'll be brilliant, I do! But because I fear it might put Danger off motorbikes. We're off to see the 3D movie for the Isle of Man TT - TT3D: Closer to the edge

Essentially, it's a sort of motorbike porn. It's fast bikes, it's the most exciting race in the world. And it's in 3D.

A nice break from...well, everything else.

And some of you have noticed I've got a new poll up. Some of you, it seems, are sadists who think I should wear a tie. ("Why do you do that?" "What?" "Go out like that. You look as if you've forgotten to finish dressing." "What?" "Without a tie. A gentleman should always carry a handkerchief and wear a tie. I don't suppose you have a handkerchief, either." "Uh...") Guess which part of that conversation was me, and which was Mycroft. Hint: Mycroft uses words of more than one syllable.

It's 26 degrees, and ties are pointless. Why would I wear one? 

45 comments:

annoyedwabbit said...

I should think, if anything, that movie will make Danger rather more keen on motorbikes.

Ties are optional, but handkerchiefs are useful! You should always have a handkerchief. They make excellent emergency hand towels, pot holders, bandages... Though I imagine that Mycroft is thinking of monogrammed linen handkerchiefs, not the sort of utilitarian things I carry.

Des said...

I'm on your side. A tie would cramp your style. Have fun on your date!

Greg Lestrade said...

Annoyed - I'd like to think so. But the news that more than 200 riders have died racing the TT might not go down so well.

Des - Not sure I have any style, and thanks! I just want to see John in the silly 3D glasses, really.

John H. D. Watson said...

It is not going to put me off motorbikes! You haven't got secret ambitions to be in that race, have you?

Greg Lestrade said...

You find me a biker who doesn't dream about riding the TT.

John H. D. Watson said...

Well, that would certainly be an interesting holiday.

Lindsay said...

Have a blast, the both of you!

As for ties, I'm with you. They are evil. I am glad I don't have to wear them, although I'm inclined to think that my gender's necessary evil of pantyhose is even worse...ugh. Actually, be glad you're not a woman. Ties are nothing compared to the pressure of constantly being told by superiors and colleagues that you need to be wearing makeup, appropriate jewelry, and styled hair to be appropriately dressed to go before a jury.

I say if a jury is going to fail to convict because I'm not tarted up enough, then the justice system is a farce and to hell with the whole thing.

I wore jeans every day of my life until about 2006. How the hell did I end up in a profession where I have to wear a suit every day? It's enough to make me want to run out and get more tattoos, I tell you.

Paula said...

I'm with Mycroft. I love men with tie and handkerchief. Completes the look.

Enjoy your date, both of you.

Anon Without A Name said...

Yay for date night :-) Interesting choice of film; by which I mean it's hardly snogging in the back row material, but then the price of cinema tickets these days, who goes to the cinema to snog anymore? (I think my age is showing :-p)

Ties - if you asked most blokes if they would be prepared to drape garishly-patterned swathes of fabric, secured with complex decorative knots, around their necks, I'm sure most of them would refuse on principle. In the right circumstances, they can look good, but as daily wear, no. Anyway, you have an excellent excuse: you chase down nasty scotes for a living, some of whom would be quite happy to try to strangle you with your own tie. So not wearing one is just common sense :-)

Also, the mark of a true gentleman is in his actions, not his apparel.

Greg Lestrade said...

I've been told I can make the smartest clothes look scruffy. I am glad I'm not a woman, yes. And court is actually one of the few times I do wear a tie (unless I forget). Mainly I think they're impractical when you do a job in which a lot of people would like to strangle you.

Danger - We could go and watch? I could at least ride the course (when it's just a normal road) say I've been there.

Lawless said...

Enjoy your date; it sounds like you both could use the break, Lestrade especially.

Eh, open-necked shirts look silly to me with a sport coat or suit jacket, but to each his or her own. If you're not comfortable wearing a tie, don't wear one. They can may also be a little too formal-looking, especially when you're out in the field.

I doubt the movie will scare Danger off now that he's been on a motorbike.

P.S. - Why is it called a motorbike and not a motorcycle? Is that another difference between British and American English?

X said...

I think ties are incredibly sexy, but voted no because it may not be wise to give a perp something with which to strangle you. ;) Sorry, Mycroft; I am otherwise on your side.

Lindsay, that is indeed perfectly ridiculous. As a girl as well, I do enjoy dressing up, but will do so in trousers, waistcoat and tie as often as pencil skirt and blouse. That could be a way to beat the double standard??

Have a lovely date, boys; you've both earned the evening off. ;)

John H. D. Watson said...

L - am also glad you're not a woman. And yes, we could go watch, sure. Sounds like a good time.

Bronwyn said...

I do enjoy the aesthetics of a well-turned out man, I will admit. And I'm hugely pleased that my students are required to wear ties every day because there's nothing that hammers home a point like grabbing the knot of a tie and yanking some jerk of a sixteen year old down to eye level to have a conversation about why their behavior is inappropriate.

But since I haven't worn stockings myself in three years, I see no reason why you should have to put yourself through tie-wearing.

Toodle!
Bronwyn

Lupe said...

You might look awesome in a skinny tie. :D Then again, if it's too hot, why bother? Wait until the weather cools down again. Then you could pull a Joel McHale look! http://tinyurl.com/3eks8dk http://tinyurl.com/3jfvary

Greg Lestrade said...

Also, the mark of a true gentleman is in his actions, not his apparel.

Which is why I'm now taking Danger to a very friendly gay pub for a much-needed pint.

Which reminds me - one day I'll explain to Mycroft the dangers of the ill-chosen handkerchief...but not until he's much older.

Polaris said...

Voted for yes before I looked at the comments - I have at thing for ties - but regretting it a bit now -- X has a point about it giving criminals something to choke you with. Then again, it might also give Danger something to hold on to. Or use for other purposes.

John H. D. Watson said...

L - you can explain it to me too at some point. The Dangerous Handkerchiefs sounds like a viable band name, but other than that I can't think what you're talking about.

The film was fascinating and slightly terrifying, but since I don't think we'll be zipping around tight turns at over 100mph with a load of other lunatics all around us, I have not been put off motorbikes for life.

Greg Lestrade said...

Danger - maybe, when you're older, too.

And no, never. Only an idiot would ever want to go that fast...

Nicky - we're not really abandoning you for the entire night. Not quite. We'll be home after one drink. Although I'm desperately trying to pretend to myself that I haven't got work in the morning.

John H. D. Watson said...

...I'm not sure I want to know now. You looked far too amused when you typed that.

And no, never. Only an idiot would ever want to go that fast...

Not surrounded by other lunatics also going that fast, that's all I'm saying. I'm quite aware you feel the need for speed.

Greg Lestrade said...

Hmm...my memory is pretty crap, but I think we'd need a mid blue hanky and an olivey green one...and that's just for starters. I won't say anything else, because I'm sure people could Google whatever I say and find out all our secrets.

And I fear I'm showing my age badly here. I'm going to shut up.


Need for speed within the national limit, you mean, of course.

John H. D. Watson said...

Oh yes. That's what I mean, of course.

You're trying to tempt me to google that, don't think I don't know your nefarious plans.

Greg Lestrade said...

As if. Heed your own advice: 'If Lestrade says it, don't Google it'.

I notice Mycroft has taken pity on me and shortened my name back to initials.

Anonymous said...

John, I think Lestrade is referring to the old practice of hanging coloured hankies from pockets/belts in the gay community, to signify what each person, uh, 'enjoyed'.

Mid blue would signify 'cop' or 'uniform'. Olive green is 'military'. Depending what side you wore them would mean 'top' or 'bottom'. You could of course wear more than one. Depending on your other likes.

It all pretty much died out in the 80s in the UK, I think, when AIDs put a stop to a lot of the more casual pick-ups that went on.

Glad you seem to be enjoying your night out.

Anon Without A Name said...

Mid blue and olive green? Awww, bless :-p

Glad that you guys had a fun evening. The initals suit you :-)

And can we get some appreciation for all the commenters who didn't make cheap jokes about the title of this blog post?

John H. D. Watson said...

You're marginally too late, Anon - I looked on Wikipedia.

And Lestrade! No wonder you were trying to grab my phone! It does not say that bue one means you're a cop, it says uniform fetish! Of which there is none, thank you! I've never even seen you in uniform.

Greg Lestrade said...

I wasn't trying to grab your phone, I was trying to grab you...well, okay, maybe the phone a bit. But then I worried someone would think that I was trying to mug you, really would call the police, and I'd find out if the uniform thing was accurate (it used to mean 'cop', honestly! When I was a lad...)

And you were interested enough in the bloody photo on here, so methinks there is interest in the uniform...

Nameless Anon - I did think everyone was being very restrained. And then you blew it. So to speak.

John H. D. Watson said...

And you were interested enough in the bloody photo on here

Not because of that!

God, some of these are a bit terrifying. And some are just...really oddly specific.

Greg Lestrade said...

It did all get a bit ridiculous. And honestly, apart from in the odd leather bar/club, I haven't seen anyone use them for years - not since I worked in a bar. Probably because no one could remember what they meant any more.

So if I told you that I had to wear full dress uniform for the royal wedding day, you wouldn't be in the slightest bit interested, at all?

John H. D. Watson said...

I would think you're lying to wind me up. There's no way you'd do it unless they made you, and they can't shut down the entire police force for one wedding - even this one.

John H. D. Watson said...

Also some of these are quite a small difference in color for quite a LARGE difference in definition.

Greg Lestrade said...

Huh. He knows me too well, dear readers.

Apparently I might be in charge of a small group of 'spotters' in the cried. Because I have 'relevant experience'.

Still, it's a day out of the office.

Speaking of which, i'm due back there in...5 hours. Bugger.

Night all.

Greg Lestrade said...

Crowd. Not cried.

and yes. Most men I know can't tell maroon apart from deep red, let alone apricot from orange. Especially in a dark club.

Don't worry. You and I can rely on that old fashioned practice of 'talking'.

Anon Without A Name said...

Restraints and blowing. There's colours for those, isn't there?

Definitely do not envy you being stuck in crowds of royal wedding fans :-(

John - I thought the same about the colour variations. There's some of those you really wouldn't want to get mixed up 0_0

John H. D. Watson said...

You and I can rely on that old fashioned practice of 'talking'.

That's a relief, given the only handkerchief you own is...er, well, I won't say. Talking's good.

Anonymous said...

I hadn't voted for ligature in the earlier poll because I don't have the upper body strength or the height to really pull that off, but I definitely voted against tie in this poll because it seems like you'd be making things a little too convenient for some of the folks you run into on your job.

Glad you had a nice date night. You definitely needed it.

Elizabeth said...

I admit I'm only using the Wikipedia guide, but my first reaction to all this is that you'll need to add a chamoise handkerchief to the med blue and olive.

Also, does Mycroft wear a tie? And has he bothered John about wearing one?

Greg Lestrade said...

Nameless Anon - No one could steal a sneaky snog in the back row when forced to wear those glasses. Every time I glanced at Danger I just laughed. Excellent documentary, though. And I will be using your final line on Mycroft. (Who is a true gentleman in both actions and apparel).

Lawless - we use motorcycle or motorbike. The latter more - I imagine just because it's shorter? I'd just call it a bike, really.

Polaris - Then again, it might also give Danger something to hold on to. Or use for other purposes. I really don't know what you could mean. (I do own ties...I just choose not to wear them around my neck.)

Greg Lestrade said...

Danger - That's a relief, given the only handkerchief you own is...er, well, I won't say. Talking's good.

I don't even know what colour my handkerchief is. I swear you know more about all my own clothing than I do.

I will try and finish early tonight...but after taking last night off (which was fantastic, by the way, even if it's taken two double espresso's to bring me to life this morning), I doubt I'll get away much before 7, if I'm realistic.

Nicky said...

Orio, you can't survive on caffeine alone. John - tell him, can't you? He should at least listen to you as a medical man, if not as a concerned boyfriend!

But having said that, I'm so glad the two of you got out last night, and spent some time together. Orio - you needed both the break from work AND to spend some time with John. John, you needed a break from work too, and some time with Orio when he wasn't unconscious. It was our pleasure to look after the boys.

Orio, we're goin home on Monday, we've decided. So if you do want to talk...well, I'm here until then. And it might do you good. But I'm always on the other end of the phone, too, don't forget.

Anonymous said...

Danger, the blue hankerchief might not mean His uniform. You do still have your old RAMC one don't you? Could it be a subtle hint at trying to get a look at it?

John H. D. Watson said...

John - tell him, can't you?

Change the habits of a lifetime in just a few months? Heh. I probably can't, no, although I will say (in case you've any doubt, L) that yes, it is in fact bad to subsist on stimulants. But I am the one who kept him out so late so I don't really have any grounds to object.

L - it's sort of grey, but I think it may have been white at one point. I've been assuming it's yours, but maybe it came from the same place as the spotted socks.

John H. D. Watson said...

Anon - I don't think my uniform is likely to inspire...well, anything really.

Anonymous said...

Not sure anyone quite believes that. A picture of some sort would be necessary to prove it...

Greg Lestrade said...

Anon - the thought of him in uniform inspires all sorts of things. The thought of him out of uniform is even better, though.

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