26 April 2011

To John

John? I don't know how to get in touch with you - the Boss is being a stubborn idiot again, won't give me your number. Are you free? He looks terrible, but he won't go home. Can you come down here, make him go? Honestly, I wouldn't do this but he looks like he's at deaths door. Sort of grey. all wrapped up like he's cold. Keeps disappearing off, to the toilet, I think. (Luckily he never signs off this thing.) Insists he's ok. I'd think he had the hangover from hell, but I know he was here until all hours last night. I think he just doesn't want to leave the case. But I think he'll keel over if he stays much longer. I hope he listens to you as a doctor, if not a boyfriend.

If you don't answer this in the next thirty minutes I'm going to either drive him home myself or get one of the lads to do it.

Sally

104 comments:

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Danger, I'm okay, you don't need to come and fetch me like a sick kid in school.

I mean, I do feel a bit rough, but I think I just ate something dodgy. I might go home in a bit, back to mine. Yu don't need to worry.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

And stop hacking my blog, Sergeant.

Sally said...

Not hacking if you leave it signed in.

He's looking worse by the minute John. If it was anyone else I would be surprised they're still upright, let alone staying in work.

John H. D. Watson said...

...Define what a bit rough means in this case, please. Because Sally doesn't strike me as someone who worries unnecessarily. And the last time I heard you say you felt a bit rough was after a getting your head cracked by a door.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Just...a bit sick. Few stomach cramps. Like I said, probably just ate something bad.

Not as death's door.

John H. D. Watson said...

Nothing else? Vomiting? Food poisoning can be pretty serious, you know.

Sally said...

I think he's got a bit of a temperature or fever. But he won't let me touch him, because he knows I'm right and I'll tell you.

John H. D. Watson said...

Right. I'll come and at least have a look. Don't let him keel over before I get there.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Love the doctor patient confidentiality.

Threw up a bit ago. Upset stomach. You seriously don't need to make a trip down here.

John H. D. Watson said...

Maybe not, but it's hardly going to be the end of the world if I've had a trip for nothing, is it? Anyway, I'm already in a cab.

Sally said...

Just realised the most worrying symptom yet. His coffee I made him this morning is on his desk, cold. Never known the boss to leave coffee. He just drinks it cold.

John H. D. Watson said...

...Are you quite sure he's still alive?

Sally said...

Not right now, no. He's disappeared again. Get front desk to call me when you arrive, not him.

John H. D. Watson said...

Right. Traffic's light, it shouldn't be too long now.

Nicky said...

Is he okay, John?

John H. D. Watson said...

Well, no, not really.I'm taking him home though, don't worry. He'll be fine in a few days.

kholly said...

Saying it's something you ate isn't going to make anyone feel better. My very first job out of school, on my 3rd day, my boss got food poisoning and ended up in the hospital for 3 days.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I'm okay, Nicky. Just a bit shaky, bit sick. I'm sure I'll be fine tomorrow.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I'm sure it's not serious, Kholly. Dunno what it could be. Danger's okay, and I only ate what he ate last night. Didn't feel like anything today.

He's got me stuffed on the sofa with blankets now, cos it's bloody freezing.

John H. D. Watson said...

No, you are bloody freezing, because you've got a fever.

Paula said...

Get well soon, Lestrade!

PS: Well done, Sally. ;)

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

When you and Sherlock get back from school, please don't let him jump on me. While i'm pretty sure there's nothing left in my body to come out, I don't want to find out via the application of excited 5yr old.

Elizabeth said...

Kudos to Sergeant Donovan for raising the alarm. I hope you're feeling better soon, Lestrade.

John H. D. Watson said...

No jumping, I promise. You might think about going to bed though. You could use the sleep.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Right now I feel more like throwing up than sleeping. Don't think the two go together well.

Nicky said...

Yes, thank you, Sally!

And you, John. It's nice to know he's in good hands. And with someone who doesn't take his 'i'm fine' bollocks at face value.

Greg, ask John, because i'm no doctor, but i'm pretty sure food poisoning doesn't usually involve a fever.

Big hugs to you. Feel better soon. And get some rest!

John H. D. Watson said...

Nicky - it can, with some types, but given what he's been eating (mainly what we've been eating plus coffee) my money's on the unpleasantness he was wading around in yesterday.

John H. D. Watson said...

And yes, thank you, Sally. He absolutely shouldn't be at work like this. He'd end up in hospital. He's in bed now, sipping water through a bendy straw, which I think it about what he's up to.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I've felt steadly worse since she got hold of you. Coincidence? I thinkers not. Work is good disteaction from feeling like shit.

Lawless said...

Lestrade - Listen to your doctor!

Get well soon.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Nicky, should be you clearkng up after me, not John., number of times I sorted you out when. We were kids. You had a lucky escape vavk to bristol yesterday.

Icm so bord of pukin now. Do I have to keep drjnking if it just makes me sivck?

Lindsay said...

I've got to say, your shit typing is extremely worrying, if nothing else. Glad you're under competent medical supervision.

Remember when you get to the stage of feeling well enough to back to work but not actually BEING well enough to go back to work, that it's best to take an extra day off now to recover fully. Far better than relapsing and spending the next two weeks feeling like crap.

Hope you feel better soon.

John H. D. Watson said...

Everything's going to make you sick right now, love, sorry. Liquids good, dehydration bad. I'll be back in a minute, just checking out now.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Lindsay - john won't let me have the laptop and my phone is hrd to read an type on.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Lindsay - john won't let me have the laptop and my phone is hrd to read an type on.

Anonymous said...

Stop trying to type, you ridiculous man!

When my kids are that sick the pediatrician says just a tablespoon or so of water every half hour until it starts staying down. I don't know if the same advice holds for an adult, though.

Hope no one else catches it, but probably no one else in the household is quite so worn down as you are. Bet Danger's going to have to tie you to the bed to keep you from getting up before you're really ready to go back to work again...I don't envy him for the next few days.

Or you, of course. Feel better.

John H. D. Watson said...

I won't let you have the laptop because you need to rest, by which I do not mean looking things up on Wikipedia for your case. I'm surprised you can focus enough to even think about it.

I've got you some electrolyte drink, which might go down better, and Mrs Hudson is making beef tea, which I admit sounds worrying but I think it's just broth.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I don't ever want to eat or drink anything again ever.

John H. D. Watson said...

I know. But I think you'd rather try than go to hospital and get an I.V. put in, yes?

Sherlock said...

Can I watch if Lestrade needs an IV? Mycroft says it's to put medicine and things straight in his blood. Is it? I want to see one.

John H. D. Watson said...

In this case it would be for rehydration rather than medicine, but yes, that's right. And we're not going to let it get that far, because he's going to keep drinking. Although possibly not beef tea.

Anonymous said...

Haha I was about to ask about Sherlock since I always did freak out when the adults were sick and I was a little kid but he seems to be having fun lol

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Only thing worse thB pukin is having nothing left to throw up but still trying.. feel like ive been given a proper kicking

Elizabeth said...

How on earth were you coping at all at work? Besides scaring everyone by not having your coffee, obviously.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

And a blanket

John H. D. Watson said...

And a blanket, check. How do feel about chamomile tea?

Sherlock said...

Lestrade looks like a zombie. I looked in through the door when John went in. But he's under a lot of duvets so it's hard to see if he's a real zombie. John says he's terrible.

John H. D. Watson said...

Anon - I think Sherlock's just way too excited that he'll be staying home from work tomorrow to be worried.

Elizabeth - I have no idea. I've seen soldiers as sick as he is literally whimpering for their mums, and he's still typing on his phone.

Ann E. said...

I don't want to worry anyone, but are you sure this is food poisoning? No one else in the household seems to have trouble -- have you been eating dodgy things somewhere else?

It just seems that in your line of work, with as many tensions as have gone on lately, it may be better to be safe than sorry. Is there any way to check?

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Danger thinks its bcause I was in the thames yesterday with a decompsed leg.

river does get a bit nasty after rain like on Saturday. But it wasnt liek i was drinking it.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

chamomile smells funny

Anonymous said...

The death threats have got me worried about poisoning. You haven't drunk any really odd-tasting coffee in the past day or so, have you??

Anon Without A Name said...

Dear god, Lestrade, put the bloody phone down! And I hope you feel better soon.

And yes, Sherlock does seem to be quite happily excited, doesn't he? Still, I imagine the Thames even without a decomposed leg is more than enough to cause all sorts of unpleasantness. The Thames with a decomposing leg sounds like a recipe for disaster.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Danger makes coffee oddly weak coffee at the yard s crap all the time.

I got cramp. what stops cramp?

Sally said...

Good luck to you, John. He sounds like the world's worst patient.

And we don't want him back until he definitely can't spread around whatever he's got, thanks.

Anon Without A Name said...

Lestrade - hot water bottle is good for cramps.

John - as amusing as Lestrade's posts are, take the phone off the poor man before he writes something hideously embarrassing?

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

hot water bottles good. i'm still cold.

Don't take my phone. need it.

Paula said...

I wasn't worried about poison, I just thought that maybe he wasn't able to endure the result of his latest poll...

John H. D. Watson said...

Hot water bottle, yes. What do you need your phone for exactly? Apart from harassing the internet for advice on cramps?

I don't think he's been poisoned - I talked to Sally and she says it's not their style. They're more the bullet-between-the-eyes sort. I'll keep an eye on him though, don't worry.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I;d like a bulet between the eys now.

getting your attention, playing angry birds (blame Sally) watching youtube about the albanian Mafia and receicing the uplifting get well soon messsages on here, whchi are making me feel so much better.

calling for help when you look like you might forcefeed me more of MrS Hs cow broth

John H. D. Watson said...

Re: cow broth, etc - it's better than vomiting bile, trust me. You can keep your phone unless (suspect until) your fever gets over 38. After that you probably won't want a record of what you're writing on the internet.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

there cantbe anything left in my body bewteen my mouth an dmy arse. possibly noteven organs.

stillcold. put on a biohaazrd suit and hug me?

Kira said...

I got very ill from water when my parents house nearly flooded one New Years. Do not want to think about how nasty Thames must be if backflow from small village gave me cryptosporidium!

SLEEP is the only cure!!

That and bad telly when you begin to feel better!

K
xoxo

Sherlock said...

Lestrade, if you have bile can I have some?

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

wlecome to it, S.

John H. D. Watson said...

No one is having any of Lestrade's bodily fluids. I'm not chancing either of you picking this up.

Mycroft said...

When I was ill one of our nannies crushed up some ice for me, to melt in my mouth, so I didn't have to drink. I could crush up some ice cubes for you, Lestrade, if you wanted?

John H. D. Watson said...

L - yes to the hugs and also more cow broth in a bit. They make electrolyte ice lollies for sick kids, does that sound any less horrifying?

John H. D. Watson said...

Mycroft - that might be a better idea than mine actually. The taste of those things might be a bit much for him right now.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

taste of the cow is horrible. too salty.

nothign doesnkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkgggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

sorry, leant on phone.

Des said...

If the colours and movement won't make you more sick, my dad's foolproof cure for any illness is cartoons, preferably whatever you liked when you were small.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Danger why doesny my bodyknwo there's nothing left to come out. Medical scence shoudl work on it.
my stomach muscles are dead

John H. D. Watson said...

Contrary to popular opinion, bodies just aren't that smart a lot of the time.

Bronwyn said...

I swear by ice water with fresh ginger grated in or ginger tea. Though, a personal favorite is fresh ginger and mint shredded into lemon tea, but I think that one's really just me. But ginger always helps me out.

Also, personally, I've found it much less unpleasant to vomit up at least something vaguely solid - if only so I felt like the vomiting was doing more than trying to pull my spine out through my navel.

Feel better, Lestrade.

Oh and Sherlock, you don't want any of the bile he's heaving up now. If you want bile, you can usually get it out of chicken livers. Though, really, gizzards are far more interesting to dissect.

Toodle,
Bronwyn

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

my body feels stupid asa box of rocks right now

Bron - stuck n catch22. drinknig, puking, Danger telling me I have to.

opened eyes just now to find Sehrlock staring at me like im a nintrsting thing under a mcriospo cm mcroscope. thing.

John H. D. Watson said...

Congratulations, your fever's up past 38, which means you have two options.

A) Sleep
B) Bath followed by sleep

I've got the boys tucked up and I'll be with you shortly (without cow broth this time, I promise).

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

which will make me better?

Anon Without A Name said...

Awww, poor Lestrade. I'd offer hugs, but...

Are you sure Sherlock didn't conduct some sort of experiment on you? He does seem awfully interested :-p

(I can only imagine how fascinating a puking, groaning, shivering adult must be to an intelligent, inquisitive child)

John H. D. Watson said...

Neither, but the bath will probably help temporarily. You'll be warmer at least, and I can change the sheets.

John H. D. Watson said...

...Don't take your phone in the bath.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

ok

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

your too good to me

John H. D. Watson said...

I'm not really - I know my bedside manner's pretty crap and overly efficient - but I do love you, and I promise you'll be better in a day or two. And you'll almost certainly feel better in the morning than you do right now, which is a good reason for going to sleep.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

it's not. it's nice. yo're good.

best doc I've ever had. promise.

John H. D. Watson said...

And that's when I worried he was hallucinating.

He's asleep, at least for now, and so are the boys, and I'm going to have some tea and sit down. It will be the best tea ever. Good night, internet.

Lindsay said...

Sleep well, John. :) God knows you deserve it.

John H. D. Watson said...

Thanks. :)

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Guess I'm not going to work today.

Feel like I've been hit by. A bus

kholly said...

I'm quite certain you shouldn't be awake yet. Roll over and go back to sleep.

And feel better soon.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Trying. Too hot, toocold, and body still attenpting to rid self f essential organs at reguar intervals

Am mailing the pope to order Danger a sainthood.

Auto thingy chages sainthood to manhood. Nt sure that's the popes dept.

annoyedwabbit said...

While I'm glad to see your typing is slightly more coherent, I'm going to echo kholly and tell you to go back to sleep.

Bronwyn said...

I'm with kholly on this one. Though I vote for the careful brushing of teeth and then going to bed. Because nothing is worse than morning-after-puke-mouth.

Sleep. Let John and the boys baby you.

Toodle,
Bronwyn

Bronwyn said...

If you're really desperate you can try my brother's favorite. He lays on his belly with his head and arms off the bed and dangling over a bucket. I don't know why it works but for him being upside down and on his stomach makes the upchucking stop. Not so much for me, but then I don't like the blood rushing to my head either.

Luck!
Bronwyn

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Will sleep more.
Danger is sleping.Looks lovely.

Thjnk I can hearvShrrlock though.

annoyedwabbit said...

I hereby retract my previous statement regarding the coherency of your typing. For god's sake, go back to bed. Clearly you need more than five hours of sleep.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I will sleep more.

Got uo because Sherlock went into meltdown that I was off work and he had to go to school. Watched them eat breakfast. Drank some of that stuff John bought.

That didn't go so well.

John's walking them to school now. I'm on the laptop, hence better typing.

John still needs a sainthood.

No part of my body doesn,t ache. Am going back to bed with my companions - drink and a bucket.

Sally said...

Well John's performed one miracle - keeping you away from here.

Everything's fine here, running smoothly. Dimmock is keeping an eye on the team, but mainly everyone already knows what they're doing, and I can sort them all out. Stay off as long as you need to (by which I mean as long as John tells you you need to, and not as long as you think you need to).

I won't even ask why I got an email from you at half three this morning.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

I was awake. Did you ook? Was I right?

Hondstly couldb't have come in. Feel weak as a kitten. And djzzy and pounding head. Plus still pukign. Lovely. Even I'm nt that stupid.

Sally said...

Yes I 'ooked'.

Yes, you were right. But it could have waited. Someone's on it.

You admitting you feel bad is actually quite worrying. Everyone here sends their best.

No, you can't have any files sent over. And don't say you weren't going to ask. I know you.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Just want to eat or drink soemthing without my body forcefuly rejecting it.

Dont see howfiles could do me any hram.

Bronwyn said...

You can't sit up long enough to spell properly. God alone knows what you'd do to your case notes. Sleep and drink fluids and feel better.

Toodle,
Bronwyn

kholly said...

Look on the bright side, if it lasts long enough it'll get you out of wedding duty.

Greg 'Orio' M F Lestrade said...

Bronwyn - no worse than Hammock willdo. Dimmock I mean

Kholly - Danger and Sslly have stopped wdding duty

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